by lil.lady.03 45 Replies latest jw experiences
Just want to say that notverylikely's answer to you is priceless.
The ego has been fed, thanks :)
I bust into tears all the time. I get headaches and so sick to my stomach. My bf said no religion should cause someone so much pain. I agree.
I saw an old friend about a week ago. He said I looked better than he had ever seen me. My headaches, tiredness, all gone.
@ Yknot. No.
Honestly as I look back at my life I don't think I have ever been whole-hearted and soul devoted. I admit, I never even read a whole magazine cover to cover. (I just look at the pictures. LOL) Our family studies were hit and miss, and I always said I preferred to study on my own. I just did the leesons to get the jist and went to meeteings because it was a routine. I never dugg deeper. I had at times been a little more zealous and aux pioneered, but I never have been full throttle.
I do consider myself a spiritual person, but I feel like I'm out growing being a witness. the quote notverylikely posted by
Oliver Wendell Holmes, " The mind, once expanded to the dimensions of larger ideas, never returns to its original size."
I think that is true. that is what learning is about. That includes any subject in life.
I'm at a cross roads but I know I wanna take the forbidden path. Like Neo, I have the choice of two pills. Just gotta do it.
Maybe you should ask your JW friend (the one with the baby) to join this website too - ?
lil.lady, you have a PM
@ notverylikely.
Thanks. I know I have been making myself sick and my body can't take it anymore. I don't like the feeling. Its too draining and very unhealthy. I basically got to a point two months ago, I said STOP! That's when I was like no more BS. I have to make up my mind and stick to it and be strong.
I always think of situations to tell the elders in case they call, 'oh I been depressed. I haven't been doing to well.'
But I'm like NO. I'm happy. I feel happier. And its not just becasue of my BF. I really feel no pressure these last few months. If feels like when the sun is burning off the gloomy fog that's been around all morning. everything is so bright and so clear!
Yet it is strange feeling because I'm not supposed to feel happy without being a witness. Only witnesses are truely happy.
(AHHHHH!!! What a mind f*ck)
Do you know what that feeling is called lil.lady?
FREEDOM!!!
@ brotherdan.
Excuse my newness. What is a PM?
@ brotherdan.
Excuse my newness. What is a PM?
Personal or Private message. Go to the top right of the page and click on the envelope.
Hi Lil and welcome.
Your b/f sounds lovely, don't lose him. The commitee meetings where they ask you intimate questions are abuse and you do not have to put yourself through it at all. Do some reading, research W/tower literature especially the really old stuff. Most of us on here did that and you can see for yourself how they change history etc, as and when it suits them. Basically they shoot themselves in the foot over and over.
Don't confuse God and Christ with the W/tower, they are not the same. The Watchtower is built on lies and deception and it is possible to have a faith once you leave. Don't be scared, they have no power or authority over you......but please be aware they will if you let them.
You are very distressed, but I have seen others come on here and they have srvived.
Be strong and don't ever feel alone because there is always someone to talk to on here day or night.
Let this be your journey, we only come this way once....... make it mean something.
