Marking - How would you know if you were marked?

by Lady Lee 35 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Georgiegirl
    Georgiegirl

    Let's see....cause the entire KH (including family) stopped speaking to me. One person only showed true kindness and love and made sure I always had someone to sit with and to speak too. Made very single f*ing meeting for a year, too. Worst year of my life. No talk, just vicious gossip. That very dear courageous friend...

  • clarity
    clarity

    Georgiegirl ..... don't you just love forever..someone who has the guts, decency and love..

    to STAND UP for you!

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I guess I shouldn't be surprised but this is all so petty. marking people because you don't approve of their behavior even when you don't know what that behavior is except that it isn't bad enough for it to be proven

    utterly ridiculous and yet they do it to people and just never see how damaging it is.

    well you are OUT now thank goodness

  • freedomisntfree
    freedomisntfree

    I was told I was marked in an elders meeting and they just said the matter concerning (my name here) has been dealt with after a a public needs talk obviously directed at me. o the love

  • Dagney
    Dagney

    I thought the elders were supposed to give a talk to the congo and tell them a person was marked, somehow, and without names.

    As for me, a former friend, city overseer/elder told his family that I was marked, as well as a relative. My relative told my sister who had to tell me. Mind you, I NEVER contacted my former friends, or sought association...so it was a needless action.

    Then I faced him at a gathering they had for my family due to a death, I was included and he fawned over me like he didn't do a thing. I ignored him. Interestingly, his wife, a good woman, stood at my side with her arm around me, and held me during the prayer. I felt like she was making a statement to her husband. **sigh** They are nuckin futs. Needless drama.

    Interestingly, it's a few years later, recently I heard they asked my JW gf to have me for dinner, and for her not to tell me that they would come covertly to see me. We are talking elders here. Needless to say, my JW gf and I both thought that was crazy, and I told her, I've moved on. Nothing in common anymore.

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    I guess I shouldn't be surprised but this is all so petty.

    Lady Lee... petty is the word. It's all about making themselves better than others. To 'mark' someone is not loving. Neither is the WTS/JW practice of 'labelling'. This all falls under the topic of judging. It's amazing just how much the Witnesses do not follow the teachings of Christ. This whole practice of judging is one of my biggest hurdles that I work on daily. I am trying so hard to shuck this crap from my psyche.

  • tado
    tado

    hi there, kinda out of topic, is marking only for JW (practicing or not) only?

    im courting a young JW lady, attended 3 sunday meetings with her in her cong.. will the elder (and/or the whole cong.) mark her (and her family) for entertaining some1 (romantically) like me?

    or it is only me that they'll mark?

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    LADY LEE,

    I think I was. At least by one family and by another sister. What Palmtree says is right. I think if a person 'marks' you they are supposed to come up to you and tell you privately. The problem is that usually these people don't REALLY have anything concrete to talk about - so they feel rather silly. It might be a matter of a difference of opinion and you not following some busybody's advice and so their nose gets out of joint.

    I also think there is the matter of conceit where they feel it is beneath them to come up to YOU and tell you they have a problem. They don't really want to talk to you anyway (some brotherhood).

    So, they get around this by ignoring you and/or not making eye contact. They imagine (in their vanity and stupidity) that you are supposed to go running up to them and say 'Bro/Sis. Conceited, is there something wrong???' to which they will tell you 'Sis. Irregular - you have a problem _____' , etc. This is quite simply a control tactic and it did not work on me.

    The point is that I refused to play their game. When I saw what certain people were doing - I just IGNORED them. I think this frustrated them to a large degree because their little act was done in vain.

  • undercover
    undercover

    Marking, in my experience, was saved for people who were

    A) suspected of wrongdoing but no proof or confession

    B) someone who disturbed the sensabilities of the rest of the congregation...like the brother who kept his hair too long, or the sister whose dress was too short. People who were independant minded and acting tended to get marked by the stuffier shirted ones. And then there was

    C) People who asked too many questions...or questioned authority. They were considered rebellious. Instead of accepting counsel, they would keep asking questions and demand answers. These people usually ended up on the radar of elders who then would casually recommend to others that they may want to curtail their association with this person.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    UNDERCOVER,

    I fell into four categories.

    A) I was suspected of wrongdoing but was never guilty.

    B) I most certainly disturbed the sensibilities of certain people in the congregation. I was scrutinized over my clothing and my figure (but was never guilty of wrongdoing). I was and am independent minded because I support myself and have no family there. I also was outspoken and answered people accordingly when they 'overstepped'.

    C) I asked some questions. Although I was not as radical as some, I was still viewed as somebody who has their own mind.

    D) I didn't care about any of the above.

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