Marking - How would you know if you were marked?

by Lady Lee 35 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Were you ever marked?

    If so, how did you know?

    I'm pretty sure my family was marked. It was never announced. None of us were reproved. But we just weren't "in".

    My family (I'm referring to my mother and siblings) were never invited to any one's house for anything. We were never included in anything other than service. I knew there were parties for kids my age but I was never invited.

    My family was really poor. We all wore hand-me-down clothes. I got my mother's cast-offs so dressed like. . . . well let's put it this way - my mother was often counseled for showing too much cleavage. And I wound up wearing her old clothes.

    Now my cong had dozens of kids my age. - just off the top of my head I can count 22 and I know I am missing some - oops just thought of a couple more - 24. We were all within 5 years of each other.

    I made 1 friend. Her mother was a JW and her father sometimes came to meetings - I think he may have been DFed for smoking but I could be wrong about that. She never got invited to anything either.

    The only thing I ever did that got a few people in a tiff was one day I was visiting my friend. Across the street from her there was a family of Witnesses with 3 boys around our age. We were sitting outside talking when the boys came by and they stopped to talk to us. We started talking about music and they asked if we wanted to come up to listen to some. So we went. Their parents weren't home. All we did was talk about music and listen to some.

    I have no idea how my mother found out. I may even have been the one to tell her. I didn't think we had done anything wrong. We were alone with a boy. There were 5 of us so I figured it was OK. Well my mother didn't and I got read the riot act about being in a boys house when there were no parents or chaperones. I got grounded for two weeks.

    I was such a good kid. My mother grounded me so I didn't go out. Made sense to me. After about a week my mother started yelling about why I was staying in the house and I should get out. I reminded her that she had grounded me. Seems I was the only one policing myself But to get back on topic . . .

    It was lonely. I was trying so hard to be a good Witness. And I was a good kid who never got into trouble - unlike the rest of my family.

    I don't think I ever really got rid of that marking by the people my age. The older ones were better at accepting me especially after my husband became an elder - way before all those kids who grew up as witnesses by the way.

    We made an effort to invite everyone over for a meal at some point - even all those who had excluded us for years.

    So if you were marked how did you know?

  • palmtree67

    When the congragation marks you:

    Likely, you would have been counselled privately about a matter by a couple of elders.

    When you don't respond to their counsel, they will give a "marking talk". Usually a "Local Needs" part. Without saying names, they will tell the situation.

    Any in the congregation who recognize who is being talked about, are obligated to mark that person.

    When someone in the congregation marks you personally:

    They are supposed to approach you privately and tell you they are marking you and why.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Isn't that public reproof?

  • wasblind

    Well, i don't know if i was marked or not, but i was invited to a gathering at two different

    sisters homes, i excepted the one who ask first, the other sister thought i should come

    over to her house but she had the personality of a dead fish, i wasn't about to put myself

    through that, not even for Jehovah, well, that next sunday she came into the hall and i

    greeted her with a friendly smile and said hello such & such, well, such & such paid me

    no damn mind. I went straight to being shunned by this hussy. BTW her husband was an

    elder and by the way he was treated in the cong he was the top dog.

  • palmtree67

    No, public reproof is when they make an announcement to the congregation along these lines:

    "This is to inform the congregation that a matter involving Palmtree has been handled and she is reprooved by the congregation."

    Usually it is followed either that week or the next week with a "Local Needs" talk dealing with whatever you were reproved for.

    A marking talk doesn't say names.

    Usually a marking talk is given because they can't really prove anything, so they can't disfellowship you. And usually there is some notoriety of what you've done, that's why they give the marking talk.

  • belbab

    When you are walking down a wide concourse at a district assembly and someone you have known as a friend for years, sees you coming and veers to the far side of the concourse and pretends she doesn't see you.


  • palmtree67

    LOL @ belbab

    Ya, that's another way you can tell.

  • garyneal

    Sometimes, I think I maybe marked. On the rare occasions that I do go to the meetings, I tend to be more lax with how my daughter behaves in the hallway area than my wife. I try to respect my wife by not letting my daughter get too loud in the hallway during the meeting but at the same time, I feel like she should not be forced to sit down and be quite either.

    Anyway, there was this one sister who, during this incident, gave me an evil eye. I held my daughter up, had her look directly at this sister with me, and said in a not too loud but just loud enough for this sister to hear, "Why is she looking at us so hateful like that? Doesn't she know what Jesus said to judge not lest ye be judged?" The sister looked away.

  • lesabre

    lady lee... that sounds like my childhood!!

  • wasblind

    Wow garyneal, your daughter whooped that sister with a scripture. Good for her

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