Been through alot of the same of crap, darlin'.
My kids were 20 and 13, though. The older one was already out and the younger one is out now, too.
I don't think there is a magic formula for getting through this. Just "ride the wave" as best you can. Shore will be there at the end, guaranteed.
Focus on your children and getting them through it. Then you will have no regrets later. Even if they don't appreciate it at first, they will later on. Mine did.
Please let us know you you are doing.
(((( NVL ))))