I'm faded. Haven't been to a regular meeting in several years, conventions/assemblies even longer. I go to the odd Memorial if I can't schedule an out of town trip that coincides with the date...
I have to say that most JWs that I know still speak, are civil, even friendly. There may be a little tension in that they know I'm inactive and acting wordly but they put on the best face they can. Occasionally some dubs will avoid me, if they were to see me in a store or something...but to be fair, if I see them first, I avoid them. I just don't wanna fool with em... It's best for both us to just go our seperate ways.
But this one experience did happen. It was obvious enough shunning that I posted a thread about it sometime back. Here's the original post unedited from that thread:
As most of ya'll know, I'm not DFd or DAd, just faded and I've commented about how I still have some contact with some JWs that I used to associate with. Only on rare occassions do JWs that I didn't know that well to begin with treat me as persona non grata...no big deal, I usually couldn't remember their names to begin with so it wasn't like I was being shunned by family or friends.
This story begins at the mall, where I was with my wife (*SBM), not my favorite place to be...but the sacrifices we have to make sometimes...you married guys know...
Anyhoo, we're in a common area near the food court, deciding if we wanted to get a snack or just hold out for real food in a real restaurant somewhere else, when a "sister" we've known for years spots my wife and comes up. We've known this person for over 20 years...we go way back. I was good friends with her when we were young, we even dated a couple of times, unbeknownst to my wife, who I met later.
This "sister" sees my wife and excitedly hurries over to hug and they get into an animated conversation over some nonsense...all the while I'm standing there and not one word of hello or even an acknowledgment of my existence. Then the husband wanders over with his Starbucks coffee in hand. We know him, but not as well as the wife. He offers a warm greeting to my wife and ignores me. Not to be rude of course(wink wink), I extend my hand and say, "Hey, hows it going - it's been awhile..." He reluctantly shakes my hand and says, "I'm fine, thank you" and goes back to sipping his Starbucks. Noticing this exchange, the wife gives me a sideways glance, says, "oh hey" and turns right back to my wife, not even giving me a chance to return the greeting.
I stood there the length of the conversation watching the young hot things cruising the mall while the three of them continued on with their boring conversation that I was not a part of. I did catch snippets of typical JW talk..."convention coming up", "CO coming", etc. I dare say I enjoyed my voyuerism much more than I would have enjoyed their conversation.
The couple finished their conversation with my wife, said their goodbyes, exluding me of course, and off went the happy JW couple, sipping Starbucks and looking so smug in their righteousness.
I wasn't hurt so much as confused and a little amused. Not having seen these people in years and not even being in the same congregation with them when I became inactive, I have to wonder just how much is whispered about me amongst old associates and friends...
Ah, cult behavior, so quaint and charming, don't you think?
*SBM - still believing mate