Weird Prayer at Last Year's DC - GB Worship (page 3)

cantleave

Hey Titus, There was a brother who gave a prayer at twickenham, back in the mid 80's and he made it last nearly 9 minutes, I remember because my brother and I used to time everything and it was a record. I actually think it may have been J Barr.

brizzzy

If they removed all the filler crap - synopsis of every single talk and its content that day, overly specific gratitude ("and thank you, Jehovah our Heavenly Father, for the lunch we ate today. The Diet Coke I had was both tasty and low on calories...") then prayers would be nice and short and snappy:

"Dear Jehovah, thanks for all the good stuff you do for us. I'm not going to list it because you're omniscient, so you know it all anyways. We appreciate the good stuff. Please keep it up. If for some reason bad stuff happens, don't worry, we know it's Satan's fault and not yours. So long, and thanks for all the fish. In Jesus' name. Amen."

Simple and direct. People wouldn't want to dive into the bathtub and slit their wrists after a prayer like that.

gubberningbody

I would have yelled..."Hurry up already!"

Mary

So part way in he gets to the "slave" and he starts NAMING THEM OFF ONE BY ONE.....ya know thanks for Splane, Pierce, Barr, Loesch....so on and so on....til he gets through them all.

I certainly hope he thanked Jehover for the three wisest members of the Slaaaaaaaabe Class:

nyuk, nyuk, nyuk......

ambersun

"Dear Jehovah, thanks for all the good stuff you do for us. I'm not going to list it because you're omniscient, so you know it all anyways. We appreciate the good stuff. Please keep it up. If for some reason bad stuff happens, don't worry, we know it's Satan's fault and not yours. So long, and thanks for all the fish. In Jesus' name. Amen."

That's brilliant brizzzy! For some reason I've got this hilarious image in my mind of the brother in question saying that prayer at break-neck speed, the last bit being yelled a fair distance away from the microphone as he begins his mad dash to the carpark in an attempt to be first out.

blondie

I wonder if he can name the 12 apostles without peeking if he were asked this moment?

truthlover

I have to agree -- last year there was this "brother" from Bethel giving the final prayer, and he must have gone on for 15 minutes - everyone was upset - he gave thanks alright, for all the anointed, again and again... I was so frustrated, as was a lot of folks, you could see the anger..

This year I timed some of them and they were close to five minutes --- but that is still a long time to hold a baby or be able to stand while you cannot.. so I guess folks just sit down and get thru it

So yes Titus -- it does happen..

Aussie Oz

i remember one closing prayer of a convention... the guy tried to recap every main point of the whole convention!

crikey! i remember swaying back and forth trying not to lose my balance it went on so long!

oz

WTWizard

An even worse way to worship the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger, and those humanoids that make up that class, is to obey them without questioning them.

nelly136

i thought there was an ongoing competition at twickenham to see who could turn a prayer into a mammoth.

the best ever prayer was the hallejujah fella who blasted out a prayer at the top of his voice then upped and offed without saying amen.

it probably took a good 5-10 minutes for anyone to work out the prayer was actually over and he'd long gone.

Weird Prayer at Last Year's DC - GB Worship

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