Have your views on gays changed over the years?

by laverite 65 Replies latest jw friends

  • journey-on

    My views have totally changed over the years. When I was a witness, I didn't really understand homosexuality and was lead to believe it was a sexual perversion, so that's how I perceived it.

    Then, when I went into business, I met some. I liked these people! They were funny, smart, creative, kind, and just seemed to want to be accepted for themselves.

    About ten years ago, I went to a child's third birthday party. I watched that little boy play and interact with everybody, and when we left, I told my husband that kid was gay. Now, at 13, it is so obvious. But, he is one of the sweetest, cutest, smartest, most loving kids I know.

    Things are changing gradually. My favorite character on "Glee" is Kurt. He is adorable! Then there is the gay couple on "Desperate Housewives". They are hilarious. These television characters are not smoochy smoochy in-your-face, but they are openly gay and we see them work through their particular issues and deal with their unigue angst and watch as others learn to interact comfortably with them.

    The only....only....problem I have with gay marriage is the issue of adoption of hetero children. If society calls same-sex unions "marriage", then there could be no discrimination whatsoever in the law regarding adoption. I still think about a hetero child being raised by a gay couple, and wonder if there could be psychological repercussions for that child, even with the love and nurturing they would get otherwise. That's my only concern right now.

  • beksbks

    Study: Children of Lesbians May Do Better Than Their Peers

    Read more: http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1994480,00.html#ixzz0qeqQJwNX

  • journey-on

    Thanks for that article, Beks. Definitely more long-term and widespread studies need to be done. The article did say that the discrimination these children faced produced some psychological issues around age 10, but dissipated by age 17. If the studies were more widespread, I would be interested in the percentage of children where the psychological issues did not dissipate.

    Also, this was a study of lesbian households. Women, even lesbian women, just seem to have that nurturing "gene". Comprehensive studies need to be done where gay men are raising hetero children and follow them on into adulthood. Where children (who represent the future) are concerned, we can't be too careful, imo. I'm not necessarily opposed, just cautious and agree that more studies need to be done on a wider scale across all socio-economic classes. We have to remember, that all adoptive parents aren't going to be well-educated and socially concerned savvy caregivers conscious of being in a "study".

  • beksbks

    I only posted the article, because it was an odd coincidence that I heard about this study on the radio yesterday. I figure it's about women. We are the nurturers, we are the ones who really look beyond our children's physical needs to the emotional. How could two moms not make for a more secure child? Anyway, that's my theory on the study results.

    There are plenty of jacked up hetero families out there, and kids will get teased for damn near anything. I got teased because my dad was so old, because I got walked to school until Jr High, because we were Vegetarians, because I didn't celebrate holidays, etc. etc. etc. I don't think that part means much, unless it's really extreme, and depending on where you live, kids can be really extreme about anything.

  • StAnn

    Yeah, but what if it were two pioneering, uber JW lesbian moms raising those kids? That would skew the study for sure!

    Believe it or not, there was a case of pioneer roommates who were DF'd many years back because they were lesbians.


  • truthseekeriam

    I never could be one of those people that talked badly about those who were gay. I have always been one of those people who asked why, before I judged..and like some who commented already, I was raised around kids who at the early age of 4 and 5 who didn't fit in with their gender. I played with boys who just loved dolls and never touched a dump truck. I knew girls who would have rather died, then put on a skirt! I watched them grow into who they were and yes they turned out to be gay and I didn't care and still don't care.

    I do think it's a trend with some, but I have known too many to know that for some... it's who they are. Just as I am, who I am.

  • beksbks
    what if it were two pioneering, uber JW lesbian moms raising those kids

    Surely it would be the pioneering uber JW aspect that would be the issue!

  • foolsparadise

    if you are born imperfect and gay then what does it matter

  • Odrade

    Yep, my views have changed. I never could quite go along with the mindset that it was bad, always believed it was genetic, in spite of what the WT said, but when I was a JW, I believed it was broken genetics, that something had gone wrong with the wiring. I thought it was a genetic aberration, like bad eyesight, or 6 toes, and that it would all get "fixed" in the New Systemâ„¢.

    Now I still believe it's genetics, but more like brown eyes or blue eyes. It's not broken, it's just different from me.

  • Pistoff

    My views changed 100%; I used to have the WT view, wrong and evidence of our "distance from perfection" but also the witness culture revulsion to it.

    This changed over time as I was gone from the hall; I kept thinking about the concept of choice. Who would choose to be gay, when gays are still seen as outside of normal society?

    I have gay friends and acquaintences.

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