Brand New: Currently Totally Devastated

by daringhart13 78 Replies latest jw friends

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Welcome! I, too, know the feeling of being anchorless. It's a very lost feeling without a floor under your feet. You are drifting and there is nothing to grab onto for stability. The rug being jerked from under your feet is another way to put it. Been there! For me, that feeling went away in a month. I got busy in school and with family and fun activities. I'm still angry at being lied to all my life (born-in and in it for 38 years). I know that will fade, too, with time. Be patient with yourself in the healing process of your grief and read everything you can about the history of the organization. That will blow your mind.

  • peaches
    peaches

    daringheart113,,,,,,,how long in the organization,,,,,,how can a promiment elder fade???,,,,,did they not "hunt" you down???,,,,,curious or (a really nosey bitch) your choice on how you want to view it..... i will not take offense....answer if you feel up to it....thanks...peaches....OR.... write your "story" then you won't be nagged with questions!!! but....no pressure....i am trying to be nosey, FUNNY, and kind....sick humor.

  • ILTSF
    ILTSF

    Welcome to the board!

  • Gayle
    Gayle

    You'll be okay, really. We do understand, most have at one time totally or at least partially believed it, invested much of our youth, life and energy into it. There are phases to go through, some stages just run together too. Please read Ray Franz's book, Crises of Conscience. He was previously a Governing Body member, was not arrogant (actually of the humblest among them), not starting a religion, wants no following. I knew much, questioned much but his book helped me to put the whole package all together with the "bow of freedom." There are other books that others will recommend also. Reading will help you re-circuit your normal brain back to healthy, that the Watchtower actually "hacked" up.

    I was a pioneer 5 yrs and at Bethel 5 yrs. Happily, left Bethel in '74, starting a family. Motherhood and several moves (required for work, but helped with a "fading") put me into a re-evaluation thinking mode. Still took me a while. Left organization by mid-80s, pre-Internet.

    There are so many here with ready references and with wonderful personal thinking skills. Again, you are not alone.

  • Life is now
    Life is now

    Hello and Welcome. I am new too.

    You said you are trying to understand how an organisation that claims love can be so cruel to people. I believe it is FEAR that makes them do it.

    1 John 4:18

    IF THERE IS NO FEAR IN LOVE

    THEN

    THERE IS NO LOVE IN FEAR

    And flow of spirit is blocked when there is fear.

    We who live in countries where there are seasons, know that in autumn things die, but spring will come again and when it does it will be so beautiful. YOUR SPRING WILL COME.

  • Doubting Bro
    Doubting Bro

    daringheart13 - Welcome to the board. You are not alone my friend. The politics on the BOE (coupled with finding out the organization wasn't what they claimed) really pushed me over the edge. But I will say that it does get better. Look forward to reading your story.

  • HappyDad
    HappyDad

    Welcome to the forum!

    Your experience sounds almost like what I went through. You will find lots of similar stories here.

    HappyDad

  • Chalam
    Chalam

    Welcome daringhart13!

    I guess I don't know what or how to contribute at this point

    You are contributing already :)

    Welcome also Life is now!

    Blessings,

    Stephen

  • LittleSister
    LittleSister

    Welcome daringhart13

    We are all here for each other through the good and bad times.

    I know things look bleak at the moment, but they will get better. You are taking the first steps towards a new life full of possibilities where no one can tell you what you should think or feel. Where it’s ok to finally be yourself!

    One day you will look back and realise that you have just made the bravest and best decision of your life.

    LittleSis

  • troubled mind
    troubled mind

    Welcome Daringheart . I was raised as a Witness and left after 44 yrs . Just walked away after a Sunday meeting and didn't go back . Over the yrs we were taught to just take the hypocrisy we saw . Never complain against the brothers and if the leaders really mess up it is all because they are imperfect . Finally one day it just over-loads inside us and we can't keeping doing what doesn't work . For me I just couldn't take being so unhappy all the time .

    It takes time to decompress ,different for each of us . It has been over four yrs for me and I am so much more happier just enjoying the little things of life .

    You'll find good advice on here . Read ......read and read some more .

    Reach out to anyone here when you can't stand the loneliness anymore .

    It will be okay you will see .

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit