Have you Overcome Guilt & Fear Since Exiting Jehovah's Witnesses ?
Guilt and fear instilled by the witness doctrines have been replaced with pride and confidence in myself. And it's a good thing.
The moment I finished my investigation into the reality called Jehovah's Witnesses - I left. I left the guilt on the KH doorstep.
I must still feel some anxiety however, as lately I have been besieged with Jw dreams [perhaps flashbacks]. Those dreams create a very uneasy feeling for me. I want them to stop. I want to put that filthy, pedophile hiding cult, out of my mind forever. I doubt it will ever happen though.
But no guilt in answer to the question.
After I DAd myself, I must admit that I felt no guilt whatsoever, or, for that matter any fear - it was an entirely new, exhilarating experience! Why do I say this? Because I was no longer a believer in any god, or an ardent follower of any so-called god-given code of morality. For the first time in my life I realized that I was a highly moral person for my own reasons, not out of any clamouring for any religious beliefs. Since abandoning JWs, I have come in contact with many highly moral people that have absolutely no religious beliefs whatsoever - something most JWs would find hard to accept, far less comprehend!
Hi Humanist :) Can I ask, when you left, did you leave behind family...or have anyone disown you? I find it exciting that you could walk away and feel like a burden had been lifted from your shoulders. That prospect sounds very enticing. How old were you when you did this?
Wow ! Tremendous comments by EVERYONE ! Thanks ! And welcome all you newbies too ! I'll respond.
LADY LEE- I think it's true with many of us that once we find out the WTS is NOT God's appointed org. - the guilt fades away within ourselves. I felt the same thing you felt.
HUBERT- I agree. " Crisis of Conscience " is a great book to read to see we weren't to blame and should not feel guilty.
CRAPOLA- I know how you feel as I have some fanatic JW family still also. Some of them use guilt on me - some just refuse to talk to me . Isn't it amazing how self righteous people like your JW mother can be ? It's like THEY feel they are Jehovah himself ! And they already have us judged and buried at Armageddon ! I'm sorry your family keeps treating you this way and putting this guilt on you. My 2 adult JW daughters do that to me also. Hang in there friend, keep strong.
JEHOVAHS SHEEP- I can assure you - you will NOT be destroyed at Armageddon. Because there IS no Armageddon. I'm sure you will find peace with Jesus in your heart in time. Hang in there, stay strong.
DISSED- It is amazing how angry these JW's can make us sometimes. I second your comment to Jeannie ! She can come hit on me sometimes too if she gets angry ! LOL! I don't mind being a punching bag to help friends heal ! LOL!
BIG TEX- Hey Big Tex . I think the next life WILL be kinder whatever that life will be. Can't get any worse, right ? Hang in there.
HIDING QUESTIONER- Good to hear from you ! I admire that you realize the witnesses are BS and stay undercover and who knows - possibly in time you may help your JW wife to see the light and exit the JW cult some day. That's good that you'd never bring anybody new into the organization. I too saw a lot of suffering in my 44 years in the organization.
WT WIZARD- The WT society NEVER feels guilt for anything. I'm sure you've noticed that over the years. Especially anything we PERSONALLY suffer. I'm sorry they treated you so badly. Keep your chin up.
CHARLIE CHEDDAR- Welcome to the board my friend ! Very good post by you ! I agree with every point you make. I too started on this board after being out for three and a half years in spring of 2007. Isn't it amazing how easily we can see the manipulation and mind control in the witnesses after we have been gone for awhile ? I certainly look forward to your takes and getting to know you. Take care and great to have you here !
WANTS TO LEAVE- I understand your dillemma . I think you need to prove it to yourself about the WT society by doing research outside the WT organization. Because ANYTHING you read by the WT society is going to be slanted to their marketing scheme and going to be pro-witness. I highly recommend reading the book " Crisis of Conscience " by Raymond Franz and " Combatting Cult Mind Control " and " Releasing the Bonds- Empowering People to Think for Themselves " by Steve Hassan. These books really helped me to decide to get out of limbo and see the REAL truth about the witnesses " alleged " truth. I also have seen people mistreated in the Jehovah's Witnesses and believe me - it's not pretty observing the hypocrisy at work inside the witnesses. I got out after 44 years trapped inside. If you use your mind and think clearly and freely like you should as a REAL human being- I'm sure you will make the right decision for yourself. I wish you the best ! Always remember- we are here if you'd like to talk or have any questions at all, I mean that. Our caring for you is unconditional, not conditional like the witnesses.
BLACK SHEEP- Good advice and words to our newbie posters ! Good job !
ANGEL EYES- You stated " No I don't think I'm going to survive Armageddon ". Then you say " it's something to look forward to " . Then you say, " Wicked ones will be destroyed. " Do you consider yourself a " wicked one " then ? I can assure you - you will not die at Armageddon. There is no such thing as Armageddon. It's an illusion. Not real. Live your life the best you can in the here and now ! Today, right now is real ! This is reality what I'm typing you right now. Go be happy now, don't wait for the future. The future the JW's preach will NEVER come.
MOUTHY- I agree. If we want to get out of the witnesses - we should just leave. However, it's hard for some because they have to research and prove to themselves they've been taught a lie. It does take time - but it's worth it.
TWITCH- Good comment. Pride and confidence are great qualities to replace guilt and fear ! Glad you've accomplished that. I'm proud of you - and you should be as well !
AK JEFF- I too left the guilt at the front door of the kingdom hall once I left. I had so much mistreatment and lack of love shown me I thought " No way these elders are appointed by holy spirit ! " It's like the scales fell instantly off of my eyes. I too have dreams about the JW's. Dreams I've read deal with unfinished situations in our lives, sometimes about people we knew in the witnesses. I dream a lot about my adult JW daughters . I'm currently trying to deal with THAT unfinished situation in real life- so I can sleep better at night. Hang in there bud
LIFELONG HUMANIST- I really agree with everything you say also ! I too after exiting the witneses found that non-religious people were VERY moral- in fact more moral than witnesses I had been around for years ! My thoughts run along the lines of you also- I can be a good , moral person because I WANT to be- not because some orgnization or alleged " God " is TELLING me to be. I couldn't agree more with you ! Good post.
WANTSTOLEAVE - I know you aked Humanist a question, but thought I'd chime in also. I was 44 when I walked away from the witnesss, yes I still have family in it. It's a mixed bag- some family won't talk to me, bt more of my JW family DOES respect my decision to fade and stop attending. So it can be mixed results- but as Humanist said - it IS EXHILARATING ! To have your freedom of mind back again and under your own power , not an organization. Freedom is sweet. Good luck, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
mouthy -you need gods spirit to understand the studies in scriptures.you need to take those rosary beads off around your neck first and put away any other idols you may have.
I was thinking a couple of days ago about the guilt trip that my parents would put on me if my husband died. I can just hear them saying, "But don't you want to be with him again in the new system?" (He's not ill or anything. He has to deal with some scummy people sometimes with his job- 3 attempted hold ups in the last 6 years!)
((hugs)) Flipper :)