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w88 11/1 pp. 22-23 par. 12 When Marital Peace Is Threatened***
The believer in a religiously divided home should do everything possible to take advantage of God’s spiritual provisions. But separation is allowable if an unbelieving mate’s opposition (perhaps including physical restraint) makes it genuinely impossible to pursue true worship and actually imperils the believer’s spirituality. Yet, what if a very unhealthy spiritual state exists where both mates are believers? The elders should render assistance, but especially should the baptized husband work diligently to remedy the situation. Of course, if a baptized marriage partner acts like an apostate and tries to prevent his mate from serving Jehovah, the elders should handle matters according to the Scriptures. If disfellowshipping takes place in a case involving absolute endangerment of spirituality, willful nonsupport, or extreme physical abuse, the faithful Christian who seeks a legal separation would not be going against Paul’s counsel about taking a believer to court.—1 Corinthians 6:1-8.
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w88 11/1 pp. 26-27 pars. 3-8 Has God Called You to Peace?***
At times, congregation elders are approached by fellow believers desiring help with serious marital problems. The elders are not authorized to tell anyone to leave or divorce a marriage mate, but they can point to what God’s Word says about these matters. As shown in the preceding article, separation is Biblically permissible in a case of willful nonsupport, extreme physical abuse, or the absolute endangerment of spirituality. It has also been noted that Scriptural divorce with the possibility of future remarriage to another partner is possible if a mate has committed "fornication," which embraces several forms of immoral sexual relations. (Matthew 19:9) Naturally, separation or divorce should not be a foregone conclusion, since it may be possible to restore marital peace, and even adultery or other forms of fornication can be forgiven by an innocent marriage partner.—Matthew 5:31, 32; compare Hosea 3:1-3.
As we noted in the previous article, the apostle Paul urged married Christians not to leave their mates. (1 Corinthians 7:10-16) In view of Paul’s words, if an unbelieving mate chooses to remain with his Christian marriage partner, the believer should try to help him spiritually. (1 Peter 3:1-4) His conversion would do much to make the home a place of rest and peace. Yet, if the unbeliever objects to the faith of his believing mate so strongly that he chooses to separate, what can the Christian do? If the believer tried to force him or her to stay, the unbeliever might make the situation so disagreeable that the Christian would be totally robbed of peace. So in the interests of peace, the believer can let the unbeliever depart. (Matthew 5:9) Only when an unbelieving marriage partner leaves can it be said: "God has called you to peace." These words cannot rightly be used to justify separation of two Christian mates on unscriptural or frivolous grounds. Every separation or divorce has its individual factors, and no "formula" covers every case. But what problems may a separated or divorced Christian face? What can be done about them? And how can others be of help? orSexual Needs Scripturally allowable separation or divorce will solve some problems. But such steps basically result in trading one set of problems for another. For instance, one divorced Christian said: "I can’t help thanking Jehovah that now I have peace." But she admitted: "It’s not easy raising children as one parent. And sometimes one can get very lonely and depressed. Even sexually it’s not easy. One has to adjust to a whole different life."
Emotional
If a Christian has a choice, therefore, he should think carefully about the possible consequences of separation or divorce. For example, consider emotional needs, perhaps a woman’s desire for male companionship. (Compare Genesis 3:16.) A divorced woman may have strong hopes of remarriage. Some desire release from a trying marriage, but are they ready to accept the possibility that there may not be an opportunity for remarriage?
Paul wrote: "If she should actually depart, let her remain unmarried or else make up again with her husband." (1 Corinthians 7:11) With some effort, it may be possible for a woman to ‘make up with’ her husband or ‘be reconciled to’ him. If Christian mates have separated, then, they should give reconciliation very serious, prayerful thought. Moreover, they should not ignore the fact that sexual impulses may pose a danger. How is God likely to view them if their failure to become reconciled should result in a fall into immorality? Illustrating this danger is the experience of a certain baptized woman. After a divorce, she began dating a worldly man, soon became pregnant, and was disfellowshipped. Although she was later reinstated, her experience emphasizes the need for caution and prayerful reliance on Jehovah so as to avoid ‘sinning against God.’ (Genesis 39:7-12) It is also obvious that emotional and sexual needs should not be minimized when separation or divorce is initially considered.
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w63 9/15 pp. 571-572 When Marriage Ties Are at the Breaking Point***
Absolute endangerment of one’s spirituality furnishes another basis for separation. The Christian’s relationship with Jehovah God is something to be cherished and protected. If, because of extreme measures, actual physical restraint, or similar treatment, the Christian believer finds it completely impossible to pursue true worship and to serve Jehovah God according to his Word and the dictates of a Biblically trained conscience, that one may choose separation. While the marriage partner is the closest neighbor to whom we must show love, Jesus made plain that love for God comes first. (Matt. 22:37-39) No human has the right to prevent one’s worship to God. "We must obey God as ruler rather than men."—Acts 5:29.
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g02 2/8 p. 10 Marriage Should Be a Permanent Bond***
Another ground for separation is the absolute endangerment of a believer’s spirituality—one’s relationship with God. When a mate’s opposition, perhaps including physical restraint, has made it impossible to pursue true worship and has imperiled the believer’s spirituality, then some believers have found it necessary to separate.—Matthew 22:37; ActKnowledge book 5:27-32.
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Knowledge Book
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chap.13p.122par.11WhyLivingaGodlyLifeBringsHappinessThose living together as husband and wife should make sure that their marriage has been properly registered with the civil authorities. (Mark 12:17) They also need to view wedlock as a serious responsibility. True, separation might become necessary in cases of willful nonsupport, extreme abuse, or the absolute endangerment of spirituality. (1 Timothy 5:8; Galatians 5:19-21) But the apostle Paul’s words at 1 Corinthians 7:10-17 encourage marriage mates to stay together. For true happiness, of course, they must be faithful to each other. Paul wrote: "Let marriage be honorable among all, and the marriage bed be without defilement, for God will judge fornicators and adulterers." (Hebrews 13:4) The term "marriage bed" denotes sexual intercourse between a man and woman legally married to each other. No other sexual relationship, such as marriage to more than one wife, can be described as "honorable among all." Moreover, the Bible condemns premarital intercourse and homosexuality.—Romans 1:26, 27; 1 Corinthians 6:18.