DF or DA what do you think the difference is?

by Rosey 36 Replies latest jw friends

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  besty

  Great post Matt - I've never seen that scripture before after 37 years of JW meetings - be interesting for somebody with the CD rom to compare the frequency of that scripture with say 1 Cor 5:11-13

  Anybody going into a JC resolved to be DF should read this:

  1 Corinthians 4:2-5 (New International Version)

  2 Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. 3 I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. 4 My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. 5 Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God.

  And then just leave them to it. Leave. Walk out. Beat it.
• 

  passwordprotected

  @ Rosey;

  hoboken.....and pp I guess my questions may have been slightly more geared towards you as we know each other and while I was df'd for "fornication"......something I make no apologies for..................and you were df'd and da'd for apostasy.........do you, now that you have left, feel that you are different as an exjw than I am............

  I think I understand what you're saying. You were DFd for fornication (a sin, according to the Bible) and I was DAd for apostasy (NB. I still believe in the Bible, God and Jesus, I just don't wish to follow the leadership of the Governing Body).

  I think we're both in the same boat. I'm a sinner, you're a sinner. We both voluntarily chose a life course that would lead to our exclusion from the 'club' called the Watch Tower Society.
• 

  besty

  I think the difference between DA and DF is in the mind of the person who is leaving the WTS.

  The need to be 'right' is strong. And if that means 'jumping' rather than being 'pushed' then some may want to get their action in first. So afterwards their mental justification is along the lines of 'well I actually left the WTS on my own terms - I wasn't DF'd - I left.' Of course others may not give a rats ass about the technicalities - they have just left and thats it.

  In the final analysis the outcomes are similar - extreme shunning amounting to psychological torture in contravention of basic human rights.

  'DA'd by your actions' was a masterstroke by the WTS and a weapon that I expect to be more widely deployed going forward.
• 

  Hobo Ken

  >Besty

  That was the passage of scripture I left them with to read in their own time at the end of my Judicial appeal.

  I also like the fact it mentions a "faithful steward" who would only be such if he did not act in the way the scriptures warn against in this verse. This is exactly the judgemental way the Watchtower and it's henchmen behave in complete oppostion to Paul's words.

  Faithful and Discreet......I think not.

  Matt.
• 

  sweet pea

  To me, being DF'd (not sure what for though, never went to the JC - could be apostasy, could be going to a church, there wasn't anything else going on in my life at the time LOL) there is no difference. Having left the JW club, I have had the judgemental chip removed from my brain.

  The way I feel now is that we are all fellow human beings and noone is any better than another.

  Some humans still like to feel they are better than another, this is quite natural. It's why we still see divisions in the world due to religion, wealth, status, etc. I put it down to insecurity.

  Having left I now feel more secure than ever and my friendships are not based on anything other than liking and respecting someone. Whether someone is co-habiting, gay, smoking, Christian, Athiest, it's all irrelevant. It's very liberating.
• 

  Hobo Ken

  >sweetpea

  Well said.

  Matt
• 

  Damocles

  Do the dubs still make the distinction between DA and DF? I thought I heard that they just went to some generic statement about not associating with the person for both cases.

  To answer part of the original question: I did not and do not recognize the implications inherent in either term. Its all part of the dub world view and I reject it lock, stock and barrel.

  I quit. How they want to rephrase it is their business. Now, I would, of course, have viewed it differently had I wanted to stay in and they kicked me out. I probably would have gone from feeling rejected and depressed to feeling liberated. But, they do have the right to decide who's in their club.

  In talking to a few folks who left, there seems to be a difference of opinion about quitting or being kicked out. Some think its important to remain dedicated to god and not quit i.e. "I maintained my dedication to god, its you folks who have strayed off the path" I can't really argue that. For myself, though, it was important for me to quit and not wait to be kicked out.

  Its hard to generalize about what the R&F thinks about things. In my experience, most dubs won't accept an honest difference of opinion, they think you must be off to drunken orgies. When I quit, the dude I gave the letter to wanted to know why I quit. I said that I simply no longer believed what JWs taught. He said (loose paraphrase) "So you no longer can live up to God's moral standards."

  Well, it was pretty clear that conversation was going nowhere. So, I'm pretty sure quite a few dubs make little distinction between DA and DF. I think a lot believe its sex, drug or alcohol at the root, even if we say we disagree with the teachings and the org.