DF or DA what do you think the difference is?

by Rosey 36 Replies latest jw friends

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  Rosey

  I would like to know from everyone first of all what they think the difference is between a df'd person and a da'd person.

  I would also like to know what everyone thinks that JW's think is the difference between a df'd and da'd person.

  Personally I am df'd. I was df'd 10 years ago almost and did not argue it at all as I had no desire to continue as a jw anyway. Before being df'd I was always under the impression that if a person da'd themselves it almost always meant they were " apostate" and that there was no way a jw should have any contact with them. Whereas I believed that there were instances where a jw could have limited contact with a df'd person.

  However since being df'd I have had NO contact with my family who are strict jw's and I have recently spoken to some da'd exjw's who still have some contact with their families. Obviously everyone's situation is different and while I now just think we're all people who've decided not to have anything more to do with the borg ( whether through actions or words) I can't help wonder about YOUR opinions.

  Rose x
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  leavingwt

  In general, here's the difference, in my opinion.

  From the JW perspective...

  DF'd = Perhaps there is hope. Maybe the person gave in to "sin" or had a "weakness". He may return to the fold.

  DA'd = No hope. Like Satan, this person CHOSE to turn away from Jehovah.

  -LWT
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  rockmehardplace

  My experience -

  DF'd - we shun you because we love you and want to win you back.

  DA'd - we shun you because you are evil and you will be destoryed.
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  babygirl75

  I agree with leaving...

  I was always told that one that is df'd, there is always hope they will return. But when one is da'd, they are automatically an apostate!
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  Finally-Free

  DF = they kick you out.

  DA = you kick them out.

  W
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  sammielee24

  Disfellowshipped vs formal disassociation? Or against informal disassociaiton aka lengthy fade.

  I know a number of people who have informally disassociated themselves from the WTS - they just refuse to attend and most certainly don't follow any doctrine, but who still have unfettered contact with their families. Don't tell policy - if you are carousing the bars and sleeping with women and not going to meetings and nobody cares, and you don't tell - well, the family is okay with that. BUT if you do the same thing and are stupid enough to admit it, OR, you formally disassociated, you'll be treated like someone with a highly contagious disease.

  As our bible study was keen to tell us - she doesn't tell the Elders what she does because it's not their business. It's all how you play the game. sammieswife.
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  leavingwt

  DA = you kick them out.

  Yes, that is how I felt. It would have insulted my limited intelligence for them to kick me out. so I decided to kick them out.

  Once I realized I was no longer a JW, I wanted to let THEM know about it.
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  iknowall558

  DA --- You make the decision DF --- They make the decision

  Being DA'd , you have conscientiously objected to their teachings etc and all that they stand for, yet you are put in the same box as every fornicator, adulterer or paedophile. If you are viewed as Apostate then you are worse than all of the above. (No offense to any DF'd people).
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  The Berean

  I believe you will find that those 2 terms are being blended for the organization. Here's why .. let's say a judicial commitee DFs someone which leads to extreme mental and economic consequences at home for the banished party. Later, it was be determined that the JC acted inapproriately, incompetently, or with bias ... LAWSUIT TIME ... maybe even up the chain to Bethel ...

  So the tric today is to get troubled members to commit spiritual "suicide" by denouncing their faith and thus making it appear that it was their choice. If anything goes wrong on the homefront, too bad ...

  The terminology being used is that "so-nd-so is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses." This willl eventually replace DF and DA ...
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  jamiebowers

  I don't know why, but when I offered to da myself, the elders said that they would df me instead. My sin was saying that I didn't want to be a part of an organization that insisted I either remain married to a dangerously mentally ill jw husband or stalk him long enough to see whether he would commit adultery or homicide. Was that apostasy or loose conduct according to WB&TS rules? Also I vaguely remember the elders having me sign some papers, but I didn't read them. They had me meet them at the kh, but I hurried in and out. My husband was out of the mental ward, and I was afraid he would show up.