Do you ever notice that when you’re driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
The stupid father of one of my kids.........
by oompa 41 Replies latest social humour
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John Doe
Why do peepholes on doors always face outside?
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hubert
If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
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musky
Has anyone seen my dog? He has a bad eye, a bad limp, fleas and has a broken tail...................He answers to name of lucky
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musky
hubert, Where are you?
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New light for you
I was walking thru the forest one day ... a tree fell.. and i couldn't hear it.
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sweetstuff
A cop sits in a old style mom and pop diner enjoying his supper when in walks an elderly couple, who are seated in the booth directly behind him, the cop can hear the couple talking about how it is their 50th anniversary and this place was where they had their first date, going down memory lane together.
The cop can't help but chuckle to himself about how cute it is, listening to them talk about their lives he can't help but overhear. Finally the old gentleman turns to the wife and whispers to her that they should head out the back and "make it" like they first did 50 years ago...when passion couldn't hold them back.
The cop nearly spits out his coffee at this, half shocked, half amused and figures it's only keep a look out for the lovebirds, unbekownst to them. As they head out the door, the cop pays his check and slowly follows around the side of the building just glancing down the alley quickly to make sure they are ok and can't believe his eyes, the old man is going at it like a fury in a whirlwind with his wife against the back fence.
Laughing to himself, he turns his head back to watching out for possible onlookers. After about 15 minutes the cop gets a little concerned for the old couple and peers again, hesitantly around the corner to the alley..the old man is still at it like a fury. The cop determines he has got to ask the old man what his secret is!
About ten minutes later...finally, the old couple come stumbling up the alleyway, looking completely dishevelled and exhausted. As the gentleman helps his wife into their car, the cop walks over and asks for a word with him alone..he recounts to the old man how he overheard them and stood on look out for them and just has to know what the old man's secret to stamina is..
The old man looks at him with one cocked eyebrow.."Secret?? secret? There is no secret..50 years ago that fence wasn't electric."
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oompa
lol....nice twiest sweetstuff....where have you been girl???...........oomps
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watson
I'm shocked!
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sweetstuff
Hey, just been busy living life, alot going on, you know how it goes. Glad you liked the joke!