Autism Times six.. on discovery health (page 7)

mrsjones5

After reading the tone of your posts I have a very hard time believing anything you say LDH. And what's incredible about you is you try to lambaste me for not being open when you really need to take a good look at the way you present yourself here. I'm not a martyr about my kid. I have not cried over the fact that he is the way he is because for the mostpart I don't see it as negative. Everyday is a day of joy and laughter in my house. I'm so happy that you're giving a little bit of yourself to do a walk....big whoop...how compassionate you...pat yourself on the back...you're such a good person

Oh and about the abortion thing, I have no problem with folks getting one if that's what they think is best. I think the issue has been overblown when the focus should be on education, availibility of birth control, responsibility, and self control, thereby taking away most of the need for abortion except for rape, incest, and medical issues. I do not believe in abstinence only, I believe it sets young people up to be totally unprepared and unaware of what to do for protection if and when they decide to have sex (Palin's daughter is a prime example; she should have been on the pill and he should have been using a condom with spermicide.)

But I'm done with you, you have a crass mean streak that I think is unnecessary and uncalled for. I don't have folks like you in my life in realtime and I don't have to deal with it here on this supposrt board. I think it's best that you go your way and I go mine. I won't be responding to anymore of your posts. Oh, you may have noticed that I haven't lowered myself to your level by calling you any names.

Josie

P.S. My tubes are already lazered cuz my body is determined to get me pregnant again...long story

LDH

Do what you want to do, believe what you want to believe.

You were the one that chose to inject your personal experience. We were talking about an ISSUE, not about you personally. We were talking about a family who had 6 children all with autism.

I'm glad you're happy. I saw the previews of the show and the woman was sitting on the ground crying while her children were in the midst of behavior issues.

That ain't for me, or a lot of other women. They just choose to not talk about it openly because of being labeled as having a CRASS, MEAN STREAK, or being uncompassionate.

Whoops. I guess you did call me names.

StAnn

Maybe those that feel in an especially accepting mood should find out where she lives and go help her clean the feces that some of the kids evidently happily smear around the house. How many days could we keep it up before some sort of breakdown?

Quandry and LDH -

My two special needs children ARE MY STEPCHILDREN. My husband and his first wife's first child had autism. They could not find any genetic cause, so five years later they had a second child, assuming it would be a normal child, who was born with cerebral palsy, profound mental retardation, epilepsy, etc., etc., etc.

My husband's first wife was overwhelmed with guilt and killed herself at age 36.

My now-17 year-old autistic stepson is still in diapers and I spend a lot of time trying to keep ahead of the mess he makes, as diapers leak. He is a messy child, he is very time consuming, and he is the love of my life. I could not imagine my life without him.

Fortunately for him and for his brother, somebody (me) was willing to step up to the plate when his mother died. Thus, he's not in an institution somewhere being warehoused at great cost to the taxpayers. For the sake of my children and the rest of the world's children, I hope there are more people like me and Mrs. Jones in the world than those who see no value to human life unless it appears perfect.

StAnn

All children are parasitic in nature, feeding off of host parents for years.

I have to admit, this caused my jaw to drop. You definitely adopted the JW contempt for family and children. The GB would be proud.

It frightens me to think how your two children will turn out. I hope they aren't aware of your contempt for them. You're right, with an attitude lke yours, it would be better for you not to have children. And I'm not being snotty, I'm serious.

StAnn

Quandry

StAnn, you said;

For the sake of my children and the rest of the world's children, I hope there are more people like me and Mrs. Jones in the world than those who see no value to human life unless it appears perfect.

You know, I think you have read something into our comments that are not there. No one seems to have said anything remotely like this. I know I didn't, and am sorry if it came across that way.

Everyone has an opinion. I voiced mine. Goodness, gracious, if someone needs help, certainly it is the right thing to do to help them. But I do, yes, feel it is irresponsible to have more children than you have resources to care for.

Perhaps you are a bit sensitive about this issue, but again, I assure you, no one intimated in any way that human life could have no value unless perfect. If that were true, who of us could stand?

StAnn

Quandry, what frightens me about this thread is that I feel people are taking it upon themselves who has the right to live and who has the right to die. We are assuming we will know everything a person will contribute to society in his lifetime and that we have the right to judge whether their contribution is sufficient to cause us to allow them to live or die.

I'm not comfortable deciding who will live and who will die. I'm not in the "marking work" anymore. And I'm not comfortable knowing there are others out there who feel that they are in a position to determine who is worthy of living and who is not.

I envision people like LDH sitting in a chair like the Caesar in Gladiator with a thumbs up or thumbs down as she looks at ultrasounds of developing fetuses. I can't see that there is anyone in the world who should have that much power over anyone else.

As Horton says, "A person's a person, no matter how small."

StAnn

Quandry

Quandry, what frightens me about this thread is that I feel people are taking it upon themselves who has the right to live and who has the right to die. We are assuming we will know everything a person will contribute to society in his lifetime and that we have the right to judge whether their contribution is sufficient to cause us to allow them to live or die.

I understand what you are saying. I don't think anyone commenting on this article about the family with six autistic children had this in mind.

I remember when I was a child....in the 1950's.......there was a family who lived down the street from us. They had a small three bedroom, 1 bath house, just like we did. They had about seven children. The children were always wandering around the neighborhood. I remember seeing on in diapers (cloth-at the time there were no disposable ones) and poo was running down his legs. He was unsupervised. I was only about seven but wondered why he was allowed to go in the street with no one watching him.

As I grew up, I thought about children who were abused or neglected. Why did the adults have children if they did not want to or could not take care of them? People put more effort into choosing a car than planning children. To me, if a person brings a child into this world, they are responsible for their care. It is better to choose not to have children, than to have them and neglect or desert them.

So, you see, it is because I am interested in the welfare of children that I feel that these people have been irresponsible. Of course, the children are here now, and difficult or not, they must be cared for and given every opportunity to progress.

Hope this helps.

LDH

Quandry, what frightens me about this thread is that I feel people are taking it upon themselves who has the right to live and who has the right to die. We are assuming we will know everything a person will contribute to society in his lifetime and that we have the right to judge whether their contribution is sufficient to cause us to allow them to live or die.

Absolute complete stunning bullshit.

The choice a mother has, is whether or not to carry a KNOWN medically fragile fetus to term.

That's all that was said. You read everything else into it.

StAnn

I really would have thought the input from anyone who had a fragile child in their home would have been, "I love my child, but I wouldn't wish the work or emotional heartache on anyone."

Ah, you see LDH, that's where you're making a wrong assumption. I certainly knew that my husband's two children were handicapped when I married him. I take care of them willingly. So far as I can see, all children bring with them work and emotional heartache in varying degrees. What you see as unpleasant work and emotional heartache, I see as love-in-action. And I get as much love back as I give. It's definitely worth it and I have even worked to help some people get their children out of institutions and bring them back home, so, yes, I HAVE wished the work on others.

I think you'd have to live with and care for a handicapped child to realize the benefits they bring to your life.

Besides, what better, more important thing could I possibly be doing with my time and energy?

StAnn

LDH

I am very happy for you that you have found work that is emotionally fulfulling. All parenting requires a risk/reward equation--some of it you know going in (like your situation) others you don't.

So it's whatever works for you--different strokes and all that.

And I agree with you--many children that are being cared for as wards of the state SHOULD be at home being taken care of by their family. I would never abandon a family member unless I had no other choice.

Autism Times six.. on discovery health

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