The elder who called me said I was taking too long with my decision
I felt that the C.O. was trying that with me. "Make up your mind. Hurry up."
While you don't need to give an actual answer to that, I did. I wrote the BOE a
letter saying I needed time, perhaps years to know what I would do. They haven't
bothered me since that.
Do what you want. Don't worry about them. If you need to keep up appearances
until you are married, just don't appear. Then they have nothing new to note.