Newbies & Lurkers - Let's Get to Know You - Please Tell Us Your Story

by flipper 44 Replies latest jw friends

  • Rapunzel

    I think that the classification "newbie," and the other classifications all depend on the number, i.e. the numeric quantity, of posts that a person makes, not on how long - in terms of days; months; or years - a person has been posting. I think that one's classification changes automatically as the number of a person's postings increases. In other words, if a person were to make one post a year, he/she would still be a "newbie" even after ten years because a person remains a newbie until they make [I believe] 50 posts.

  • dinah

    Flipper, you should play. We never make enemies, but always make friends. Just don't be nice like BFD. You gotta tell a lie or six.

  • flipper

    RAPUNZEL- I agree that " newbie " is just a term they use for how many posts are accumulated. There might be some people who have been here several years - they just don't post much. But they still have valuable stories to share. Everybody does !

    DINAH- Well sis, I don't know if I'd do very well in the werewolf game as I don't lie too well ! I'm pretty much all about honesty , even when I'm playing games ! LOL! Guess I'm too boring, eh ? Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • dinah

    You gotta point, Flipper.

  • flipper

    Just wanted to bump this up for anyone wanting to tell their story ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • hotchocolate

    Hey Flipper.. I'll bump the thread along with a quick version of my story for anyone who's interested.

    I'm a 3rd generation witness, I've always tried to be a "good girl", ignoring my own inner voice, viewing any internal struggle as the imperfection of my "treacherous" heart and so instead based all my major life decisions on what the society advised.

    Marriage at 18 on the advice from the local elders that the one year courtship had run long enough. Pioneering for a number of years, despite having a strong aversion to disrupting the householder's privacy, and the embarrassment I felt at the discourtesy I perceived this to be. "Aha! Fear of Man!" I thought, "you need to work on that." Ignoring my passion for study and education, I instead directed this into a deep study of the Bible, of course always referencing the Watchtower to assist me, even though on many points I often experienced disappointment at the lack of an explanation that would ring true to my own innate sense of logic. "Aha! A lack of faith" I told myself, "something else I need to work on."

    I'm often amazed that I didn't allow my true inner voice to speak to me much earlier than this. But I see that most witnesses just ignore those doubts. If their life is running reasonably smoothly, they have a nice group of friends, they're convinced and enjoy the feeling of being part of the only group on earth that God approves of. Yeah, maybe they've given up their dreams - but five meetings a week, plus study, plus field service, plus the fact that they surround themselves only with people who agree with them, is enough to convince them that any inner doubting is imperfection and should be ignored.

    My theory is that a witness will only begin to listen to their inner voice when something touches them on a personal level. Convincing a happy witness that it ain't true is nigh on impossible in my books. For me, there was an ongoing lack of self-fulfillment and some unhappiness which led to the questioning.

    It was the day I asked myself, "YES. BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK?" that started my journey. That was about 8 months ago. Things have steamrolled since then, and many witnesses are aware that I am having "issues" with the "truth". Lots of people have expressed their shock at the change they've seen in me. "This is not you!" they say. And to begin with I would agree with them. But now when I hear that comment, I smile and disagree politely. My inner voice is no longer smothered, and these days it pipes up nice and clearly. Right now it's saying "Actually yep, this IS me. Get used to it."



  • JimmyPage

    I was raised in "the truth". It was very tough growing up in school with the whole flag salute, holidays, etc. I started to get close to a worldly friend and my parents put a stop to that. They encouraged me to associate with a Witness that was my age. Thing is, everyone in school thought he was gay. I told them all that he couldn't be- he was a Jehovah's Witness. Of course in time it turned out that he was indeed gay.

    After high school I regular auxilliary pioneered for over a year and was appointed a servant at 19. I applied for Bethel but they wanted regular pioneers. Of course I was putting in the same amount of time as the regular pioneers, they were just counting theirs differently. I really wanted to date and get married but pickings were few and without having gone to college making a living was hard, let alone supporting a family. My dad had told me I would never graduate high school because the end was so close (that's been two decades ago). I moved out of state and faded. I dated worldly girls, which at first was really tough because of all the things that had been put into my head over the years.

    One time an elder stopped by my apartment. I won't divulge his last name, but it rhymes with "jerk". I was waiting for the cable guy. Basic cable, mind you, no movie channels. This SOB elder says "are you getting cable so you can watch dirty movies?" Where's the love, right?

    Eventually I went back to school and got a decent career. Then I got in touch with a Witness girl I used to know. We ended up getting married. I've gone to meetings for her and made some friends with common interests. But recently I've found out so much about the borg that it blows me away. My main concern is that I am a father now and I don't want to raise my child in all this nonsense. Any advice on how to do that is appreciated since my wife is in, her family is in, and my family is in. I guess I'm in as a body, but my mind is very free.

    Oh yeah, I saw a guy on here that I grew up with. It's so cool to see people you know that have been through the same things.

  • flipper

    HOT CHOCOLATE- Thanks for posting your great story ! Raised in the witnesses like me ! It seems it's been a gradual process for you doubting what the witnesses taught you and your unhappiness has motivated you to have the courage to think freely by questioning things you doubt.

    The witnesses organization always tries to blame our " lack of faith " on why we have doubts, but it is really a cop out on their part and a passing of the buck of blame to us - so they won't have to admit when they are wrong .I wish you the best on your journey to freedom friend ! Welcome sis !

    JIMMY PAGE- I understand your story Oh so well. Thanks for posting it , it's a good story . I too was raised in the witnesses. I got married young though at 19. I too was appointed a young ministerial servant at 20. Too much pressure at too young an age! So you faded away from the witnesses and basically came back to meetings for your wife and family ? It's a tough road to go down - I know, I did it a bit in my past life too. Hang in there dude. An elder dissed you for getting cable T.V. ? Jeez, they are controlling. He was probably envious. So you have a child now ? I understand your not wanting to bring your child up as a witness - however I will give you no illusions , it will be tough because your wife is a witness as are your family and hers . But it can be done . I would recommend secetly reading the book, " Combatting Cult Mind Control" by Steve Hassan. It has some good ideas in there about helping your wife to bring back her authentic non-witness , or pre-witness personality. Things you can talk with her about which you have done together involving fun, non-witness good times together. Also I highly recommend you get ideas fromsome of our posters on board who have and are dealing with witness mates - and they are not going themselves. ON THE WAY OUT, OOMPA, and STILL IN 74, are 3 such posters who are trying to hang in there with wives who are " witness controlled " still. I would highly advise you to PM them for other suggestions as well ! Putting all these minds together will help you friend ! So, hang in there, PM me if you would like, perhaps we can talk on the phone some time ! Oh! And I still love your avatar ! Jimmy Page - my all time favorite guitarist ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • flipper

    Just wanted to bump this thread up for newbies, juniors or any others who want to post their stories and get some encouragement they might need ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Quandry

    I missed this thread before, and wanted to say how much I enjoyed it. Welcome to the new ones!!!

    Whoknows, I had a Barbie just like this one as my first one!!!! I hink it was in the late 50's.

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