For the ladies. Do you think that when you.....

by NotaNess 236 Replies latest jw friends

  • moomanchu
    moomanchu

    I have the hardest time reading the words printed across the back of girls sweat pants,

    without actually looking at their behinds.

  • changeling
    changeling

    Merry: thank you for sharing your views with us. Modesty and self restraint have their place. But IMO, like anything else, they can be taken too far and become stiffling.

    About how a person dresses: Some people do go "too far"." Push the envelope". These I just right off as tacky. However, I would hope we are all adults here and that we were all taught by our parents that: it is RUDE to STARE!

    Pertaining to women, many Men don't know how to control their outright staring and commenting at the ladies. Others, don't want to try and control it. It's just what they do.

    The above is a perfect example of someone who either was not taught manners or who failed to learn his lesson.

    Yes, men can and do show self restraint. Men can be true gentelmen regardless of who walks into the room. It's very sad that some choose not to.

    By the way, in case anyone is wondering, I don't dress in an openly provocative way myself. That's just not me. But I do not presume to tell others how to dress, nor to I pass quick judments about their character because of their taste in clothes. Everyone deserves respect.

    Also, I have raised a son into young manhood and I can proudly say he is a gentelman.

    changeling

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    I do not stare at women. I've often gotten the impression that a few of them are disappointed. ;-)

  • kerj2leev
    kerj2leev
    after all, 80% of hell consists of women right?

    I'm liking those odds! I also hear the Devil wears Prada.

  • Cold Creek Swimmer
    Cold Creek Swimmer

    I have read each and every post on this thread. I am conflicted to some extent as to some of the answers given. However, I will throw in my 2 cents anyway. Here goes:

    Sweetstuff, correct me if I am wrong, and please take no offense. Would it be fair to say that a woman of your intelligence understands the effect your (or any woman's) style of dress has on a man? If so, in your case, I am assuming that the reaction you receive to the clothes you wear are a good indicator of the moral fiber and intellect of any and all men that you encounter in your daily routine. Could I go so far as to say that in some instances you and others like you wear certain things specifically to detect unseemly individuals?

    Maybe I am reading too much in to the whole style of dress issue presented here. Maybe it is as simple as "This feels sexy and I feel sexy today so this is what I will wear." If that is the extent of it then great. I think my wife feels that way. She is the most unpretentious person I kinow. She's oblivious to how her dress affects others. It is all a matter of how she feels that day or what is appropriate for work.

    I guess I am even more confused then when I began, but I can't help but believe that in SOME instances, CERTAIN women dress for a reaction. I also believe as stated above that cave dwellers can be picked out by their reaction to provocative clothing-thus the need to dress in that manner for that purpose.

    Remember, these are only theories and ideas gleaned from this thread. They in no way reflect the moral barometer of the one whose head they come from. I am just looking for reasonable answers to the ideas I have hypothesized.

    CCS

    P.S.-Sweetstuff, I never noticed your decolletage until this thread. Am I a cave dweller now? I just thought it was a pretty photo before attention was drawn away from your face.

  • Anti-Christ
    Anti-Christ

    This reminds me of a joke. The one of the psychologist who shows ink stains to a patients and ask him what it makes him think of and the patients always replies "sex". The doc. says " I think your obsessed with sex" the patient replies "your the one showing me all the dirty pictures"

  • Mincan
    Mincan
    Funny, how I'm trying to encourage the ladies(but not in the easiest of ways), to not dress so revealing, and to actually GET a little more respect from people

    Dude, here's an idea, how about you respect a female no matter what she's wearing.

    This thread is crazy. 9 pages in one day. As for my thoughts. I used to be a chauvanist when I was a dumba...er witness, but it was all far too vocal, almost like I didn't really believe it.

    I dislike gender roles to the extreme. I have many traits that are "traditionally" (I dislike tradition for tradition's sake) female and not very many that are male (for instance I hate cars and contact sports, preferring outdoor activites (or "sports") where I can do it with a partner or by myself). According to many online tests I have taken about my neurological makeup, I have a very "female" -like brain (thought processes and mental inclinations, etc). This reinforces my distain for traditional gender roles.

    However, I accept evolution and the differences between males and females (I use females because "girl" and "women" can get some people angry and/or confused, and there are several branches of post-industrial feminism that are absolutely ridiculous). The fact that there is so little sexual dimorphism in humans, among many other things, suggest that males and females had egalitarian relationships in our band stage of evolution (nearly all of it). There are obviously "roles" or rather activities that one would play over the other (for instance breast-feeding infants). However, civilisation has perverted this to the extreme. You must understand that the nuclear family such as we know it is a recent development of civilisation. Relationships between humans during our evolution were much different from anything going on right now. I'll allow you to come to your own conclusions.

    When I'm out and about and an attractive female is in front of me, I may causually notice something attractive about her from a rear view... but I don't stare, it makes me feel ... sad in a way. When an attractive female is approaching, it's all about eye contact, I love eyes, it's my soft spot. I like faces and noticing how someone is feeling and imagining what they are thinking about.

    I am a people watcher. Mostly because I am a loner at this stage, hopefully to be remedied soon for sanity's sake. I like watching people interact with each other, etc, I may watch people, but I don't stare. And if I do stare, I'm looking people right in the eyes, and this is only when I've noticed I'm hyperfocused or on my ritalin.

  • changeling
    changeling

    Mincan: you have just climbed up the ladder of my esteem in an exponential manner.

    changeling

  • lucifer
    lucifer

    it all depends on the stare, is it a creepy stare where they are undressing you with their eyes...cause that's sick, but if I dress to impress, I expect people to stare. ego booster I guess

  • misanthropic
    misanthropic

    I don't know what NotaNess intentions were with starting this thread other than the original post I read of his.
    People telling him to grow up because he asked a question and phrased it in a way they don't agree with I found a little harsh.
    His comment here:

    Funny, how I'm trying to encourage the ladies(but not in the easiest of ways), to not dress so revealing, and to actually GET a little more respect from people

    I found completely unnecessary and don't exactly see where that comes into play with the discussion- I don't think any grown woman needs to be encouraged in how you think she should dress. At least I certainly don't want your advice on the matter.

    It's been said by me and others and I will say it again; SOME women purposely dress revealing because they WANT to be looked, it is a fact and to say that's just not so is incomprehensible to me. Making any moral judgment on these people or how they choose to dress to go to the grocery store is not my intention here.
    In fact I know someone that I stopped doing things in public with (and I think this is a very valid point to this discussion) because of this. She was a very curvy girl who wouldn't wear undergarments of any kind then dress incredibly provocatively which made it only obvious she had no undergarments on. Now I don't care if someone doesn't want to wear undergarments but I don't want to be shown that you don't wear them (because it's very visible with the clothes you chose to then wear). Anyway this girl would then make a huge scene and completely embarrass me and everyone around when people would look at her. She would yell at them saying "keep your eyes to yourself" and things like that. I know her I know she loved the attention she got and I have since seen in my lifetime many women who seem to be subscribers to this same sort of "fashion" sense as some have described it. I don't care how anyone dresses as long as it doesn't affect me. But I strongly believe and will continue to believe that this is something some women do because they like the attention. Even if it is not positive attention. I do believe there is a valid point in that statement that NotaNess made with his first post on this topic, although I can't say I agree with much else I've read from him thereafter.

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