This is the deal at baptism: You have to give up your whole life. You have to spend all day distributing Puketower literature. You have to give up a decent job and education. You cannot have any fun. You cannot later decide to do something with your life, ever. You are expected to devote as much time as they feel you can in the field misery. You are accountable for anyone that gets left behind because you miss a number or you didn't feel like staying out past 8 or 9 PM instead of noon one day or because you didn't feel like giving up your job. Anything that is fun is off limits.
And what does Jehovah have to do in exchange for all this? Exist. That's His "end" of the deal. He owes you nothing, even though He can prevent you from ever fulfilling your hopes and desires that He made you with. He doesn't even owe you getting out of your way to fulfill your own dreams! All He has to do is exist.
What kind of fxxxing deal is that? I, for one, do not see any value whatsoever in fulfilling my end of the deal, since Jehovah doesn't even owe me life itself! I could do all the things I am "supposed" to do, only to have Jehovah decide I could put in one more yoctosecond (a septillionth of a second) in the misery and destroy me for that. Or, I could get in only to find nothing but celibacy and stagnation and Jehovah angrily crying out that I ought to be thankful for the "privilege" of just getting in.
As a result, my dedication and baptism have been officially revoked. I will not go out in the field misery. I will not go to the boasting sessions, ever. I will continue celebrating holidays despite their insistence that these are wrong. I will not give a fxxx if people die because I did not go out in service instead of staying home to light my "sun-worship" tree or put up apostate posts and blogs online.
A warning to any family or group that thinks they can recapture me and force me to do Jehovah's will: I promise to make your life as miserable as I can. You better hope you don't have a computer because I will leave every apostate Web site open that I can access. If you entrust me with literature to place, you had better make sure to watch me every second because I will attempt to write apostate Web site links in every tract and magazine I can. You had better watch your car, because I will try to remove and hide the spark plug so you will not be able to attend the boasting sessions, making especially sure to sabotage your attendance at the Crapmorial. And, if I am taken on a call that's within reasonable distance from my real home, I will pull out my copy of Crisis of Conscience and my Ouija board and take these with me in service. Hopefully I will be able to stumble the whole group out of the Tower. Failing that, I will (and I promise) to bring in as many demons as I can into your group.