by jeanne40love 33 Replies latest social family
well I am surprised too they haven't dfd her.. I guess because she isn't going to meetings or attending any other JW events.. if she showed up at the wedding, they probably would be forced (their hand) to see about dfing her...
I know they have rules about who is supposed to be allowed to attend if the wedding is at the hall...
oh my, such sad stories (((to all of you)))
my x, a jw , went to our disfellowshipped daughters wedding, there were only non jw's at the wedding so not an issue
orb
Oh, Oh, Oh. I just remembered this. It is extremely pertinent.
The wedding at a Kingdom Hall is a meeting open to the public. They don't have to
invite you, the invitation is open to the public.
The reception has nothing to do with the BOE. The Groom or his designates are
responsible for that. It is the responsibility of guests to decide whether to inquire
about non-dubs or ex-dubs or inactive dubs. Now, the Groom and those hosting
the reception may have decided to uninvite someone because of something the
elders said, but it sounds like they are all backing down to the pressure from
elders when they don't have to.
"Putting all those other people in jeopardy" is a smoke screen to let the elders
feel like THEY are in control of who gets to do what.
This doesn't really change anything, UNLESS your daughter wants to get in a
pissing contest with them. If she did want to go to the wedding (but not the
reception which she was uninvited to) then I would say, "Pack up the husband and
the kid and anyone else you want with you, and go to the public meeting that is
a wedding." Don't be argumentative when they get there. Just come in well
behaved and sit down. Let them be the jerks.
After reading your reasonableness, I am sure you don't want this to happen.
I just say this because the elders overstepped their bounds.
An elder officiating a wedding at the Kingdom Hall could refuse to
do so because he thinks the brother or sister getting married are
not spiritual, but I would make him say so.
The reception is not his concern. If he decided to make it his
concern, then there isn't much you can do to make him conduct the
wedding talk, but I would have to tell him all this if I were involved.
Easier to just "show up." This way, the bride and groom followed
his ORDERS, but the meeting is public and you can't turn them away.
Welcome, Jeanne40love. Sorry to hear of the miserable behaviour of your family and their spiritual leaders. Onthewayout has some very interesting insights!
At least she won't have to buy a Wedding Present. She could use the cash to take her family out to Dinner while the Wedding is going on.
Most of us have been there at one time or another.
We were not invited to my sons wedding - I have never met my daughter in law. We were uninvited to a funeral though - after driving 2,000 miles to attend a family funeral, we were handed an envelope telling us not to bother visiting as the family simply could not chance such bad association................life goes on.....sammieswife.
I don't think they can df someone who is no longer associating.....but I could be wrong. She has no association with JW's AT ALL.
no invite no presents to infinity
Welcome Jeannie!
I too noticed your balanced outlook and admire it.
Now, lets see...
OTWO points out the publicness of the 'meeting', hmm.
Well you COULD just go and daughter could show up, what are they going to do? kick her out? make a scene?
It's all in yours and daughter's court, but I bet you guys don't crash, you don't seem the type to spit in their faces.
RD
