For Those That Married JW, Did You Have Sex Before Your Wedding?

by Good Girl or Bad Girl? 39 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Seeker4
    Seeker4

    We never actually had intercourse until our wedding night, but we did a LOT of petting and masturbation. This was in the 1969-1972 period, and today what we did would be considered fornication.

    What's cool is that I no longer feel guilty about it!! We also never told the elders.

    S4

  • JK666
    JK666

    As a three time loser in JW marriages:

    1. Yes, we did

    2. No, we didn't

    3. Only oral (Don't know if you are Clintonian or not)

    JK

  • misanthropic
    misanthropic

    My first marriage was a JW marriage and we didn't do anything until after we were married.
    But then I only knew him for a couple of months before we got married (we hardly even knew each other).

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    first wedding.. No.. we were having sex about 3 months before the wedding.. I was actually pregnant on my wedding day.. although I didn't know it.. you would think when I took a bite of the wedding cake and immediately ran to the bathroom to throw up I would have had a clue!

    my second wedding? no.. I always felt guilt for my 'fornication' with my first husband so I wanted to make sure that I did it right the next time... be faithful.. obedient.. give our marriage the best foundation..

    what a bunch of Bs.. turns out he was hiding from me that fact he COULDN"T have sex... what a revelation that was on our wedding night..

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    My husband was raised as JW, but like myself, left at age 18. When I left I had just given birth to my oldest son, he was 2 days old when I packed up and left. His dad hit the road when he found out I was pregnant.

    Neither my husband or I were virgins when we got married, and we did it as often as we could. I can't imagine getting married to someone with out a test drive. What if that person makes weird noises that you cant stand during sex, or as sassy said can't? What if sexually you just are not compatable?

    I say test it out before even get'n engaged!

    nj

  • Mum
    Mum

    My story is the same as that of misanthropic. I only knew the guy a couple of months. I was always a "good girl" swimming in stupidity and compliance with the all-important rules.

  • oneairhead
    oneairhead

    Interesting topic as I have always wondered about this. My wife and I were married in the KH and both of us were virgins. What a huge mistake it was not having sex before marriage but I was scarred s--tless because I thought I would lose my family, lose my religion etc. But I have regretted it ever since. My wife does not like sex in any form and does not want to have it and is not attracted to any guys sexually. I believ her to because she never says or does anything to indicate that she is aroused or read anything that is sex related just a good little witness girl forever. I have stopped attending meetings service everything. We have sex 6 times this year and when I ask for more she says take what you can get. Anyhow single witnesses on here don't make this mistake - hump before you jump because if you don't you'll have find another to hump if you want to hump. LOL

    One

  • JK666
    JK666

    oneairhead,

    Welcome to the forum! Thank you for your candor and experience, I too think that the Society's rules have resulted in a lot of screwed up marriages.

    JK

  • tinker
    tinker

    ditto of Seeker......Yes and No.....this was 69 so we did EVERYTHING but the Big One. I was a little teeny bit guily but got over it and never told anyone. Some years later when we were missing a few meetings and elder came over to investigate and asked all about our pre-marriage. He said 'maybe Jehovah is witholding his spirit because you are guilty of something. He may even hold back his spirit from the whole congergation becasue of you! AS IF! Even though I was young and a koolaid drinker at the time, I didn't fall for that over-rightous baloney. We did start back to meeting and became very stong but never Nazi-witness's.

    I do know many many young couples at the time did 'Do It' Some were reproved and not much else, some were DF'd years later when it came out. I was very subjective. Depended on how well connected you were to the Boys Club---JC.

  • kerj2leev
    kerj2leev
    My first marriage was a JW marriage and we didn't do anything until after we were married

    Damn, wasn't the answer I was looking for!!

    As for me, of course we did'it....umm I mean didn't...I'm pure and innocent!

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