Hello all. It was requested of someone on the board via pm to tell our story. So here goes. I'll try to keep it brief, for me that's hard. Mrs. Flipper was raised Catholic and got out when she was 12 because the nuns and cathlolic school teachers didn't like her independent thinking mind. She saw it wasn't for her,so got out. She never went back to religion but remains a very earthy, spiritual, woman. I would describe her as going along with native americans views on religion. My views too. Try to be accepting of others.
She divorced in 1990 and we met in early 2006, got married in Oct. of 2006. Met on E-harmony.com. It really worked, we have similar interests, mountains, music, justice, and ethical treatment of others. It worked great. She is 52, I will be 48 in October. We are very happy. Her parents are in late 70's live in the area,they left catholism too.
Mr. Flipper was born and raised as a jw since birth. (Poor bastard)! My dad was city overseer for 30 plus years in a town in the Southern San Joaquin Valley in California. Was raised and stayed in that town till age 25. I was the youngest of 4 children, all towing the line as elders children in the 1950's, 1960's and 1970's. My older brother went to Bethel from 1967 to 1974 then became a self righteous elder who everybody looked up to as important. My older sister graduated Gilead in 1972, but could,nt go overseas as her husband got depression and they had to come back home to California. Had another older sister who married an abusive witness husband who beat the hell out of her.Finally getting in the face of the elders she said she could not take it anymore, she was divorcing him. Good for her. I get along with that sister, not the overachievers though.
Mr. Flipper was a ministerial servant 6 years, regular pioneer 3 years till ex wife #1 had our first child in 1985. My son is now 22 a smart college going exwitness like myself, and my greatest friend and advocate other than Mrs. Flipper, love him to pieces. First ex and I divorced in 1998 as she was having flashbacks on being molested as a girl. She refused counseling, as actually recommended by the elders, and we could not continue the marriage as man and wife as she refused any kind of sex at all. So we seperated with divorce pending it was mutual, but in 1999 I had trouble holding on as a single person and in a seperated, divorce pending state got a girlfriend. The ex wife even thogh split up from a year before ratted me out, I got disfellowshipped , was out for 3 years till 2002. Got reinstated primarily to associate with my family again, but really wanted to give the org. another try. Married my non witness girlfriend. It only lasted a year and a half as she was an emotional terrorist, addicted to methamphetamine or crank. I didn't know how to recognize it having been raised a witness.
The elders pretended to show caring by listening to me tell of mt then wife kicking me out of the bedroom 16 times in a year and a half because she'd get in a snit over something, anything sets cranksters off. You can just look at them funny and they're paranoid as hell, mad. So mercifully she left with her kids in late 2003, and I had peace once again. After she left, she hooked up with a guy.
I had a lady friend 4 months after she left who I went to coffee with, a publisher ratted on me in the congregation and all of a sudden a judicial committee meeting was set. I thought the elders were checking on me to see how I was faring after the split but they had it out for me. They said I should try to get back with my drug addicted wife as long as my kids were'nt involved and I told them to take a flying leap. They said,"Well, since you are dating 4 months after your wife left it appears you didn't care much about the marriage working". I told them that offended me greatly as we had gone to several marriage counseling sessions to save it. Hard to live with a druggie though.
So I walked out of that kingdom hall and never went back. My mom and dad the elder were supportive of my decision as they felt I had been given bad counsel. After trying to convince me that it was imperfection and don't judge the whole organization on those elders, I asked them,"Why isn't there a check system in place that the circuit overseer can pour over the things written and said which are wrong in jc meetings? They just allow the elders too much free rein to give half-assed counsel to people, ruining their lives in the process." I woudn't back down, so my folks respected that. But my daughters didn't. My ex, their mom started maligning me to my daughters saying I was being rebellious and should listen to the elders. She influenced my girls to not have much to do with me till I went back to meetings. So for 4 years I've tried to have a semi relationship with them, as much as they'll let me. But now they married "good" witness boys so we'll see what happens.
My younger aggresive daughter and her mother recently (last 10 months) tried to get me dfed after fading for 4 years not attending meetings, claiming falsely I lived with Mrs. Flipper before we married. The ex wife s efforts failed as an appeal committee overturned the original jcs decision to df me. They had no proof, everything was hearsay, and the original jc dfed me because I refused to meet with them about the false charge. That being said, my ex wife still tried to slander my character to my parents and older brother and sisters. My parents saw it for what it was, an ex wife being vindictive and they supported the appeal committee elders decision to not df me. The society handed the decision to them.
So now I continue my long hopefully (peaceful) fade having weathered some storms here. My loving wife and 22 year old loving son are my best friends and support. It's been a hell of a last 11 months, however I am an eternal optimist and the glass is always half full with me. I've been self employed 25 years and my wife is too, we do fine,are at peace. Some of my jw family accepts me, some don't, what can you do? I know I'm a decent guy, and treat all my kids with love the same, whether they accept it or not, it's up to them. So hope you enjoyed it, we all have our jw stories and may peace inhabit all of your lives on this board. Mr. Flipper for Mrs. flipper and Goodnight now!
P.S. One of my main motives since being out is to help people see how to get out and to reveal the evil that goes on in the organization regarding child molestation coverups and other abuses of free will. Peace