well, maybe I was wrong. I believe in taking the high road when possible, but if he has always been a cruel person, maybe he is just being as cruel as he knows how because he can't be physically cruel any more. That's the disadvantage of online forums like this - I pop off with advice when I don't know the whole story.
Shunned
by Anti-Christ 22 Replies latest jw experiences
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sspo
I found out that the best thing with the Jw's is to keep your mouth shut and not try to reason or argue.
Anytime you say anything negative about the teachings of the Watchtower, you're done,....apostate label is fixed to your forehead
and they are done with you.
My marriage fell apart after 26 years because i thought i could convince my ex of the lies of the watchtower.
Hang in there and hope that one day they will see the "truth" on their own.
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SB
weird, i havn't posted on this forum for months, and the reason i signed on today is b/c at the last assembly some "sisters" approached my mom crying, saying they heard i was apostate. my mom made up a reason to avoid embarassment, something like, "no no, she left because someone stumbled her, but she still loves jehovah".this seemed to console them she said. but i thought, "what? who is so quick to label me apostate, when no one talks to me anymore?". simply not going to "meetings", and giving no viable explanation, leaves the jw's dumb founded. they are so used to being handed an explanation for everything that baffles them, that when there is no explanation for someone's actions, they are handed a label to explain it all. (if that scentence makes any sense...).
what i have found helpful w/angry family, is to prove to them i am a better person than have ever been. they don't need to know my reasons for leaving the wt; all they need to know is that i love them. kill them w/kindness, it really does work. it doesn't work on all my former "best friends" and "brothers and sisters", but it seems to work w/family. but i am lucky i guess, b/c my mom was never baptized, she's just a four decade "study", so she's a little more liberal, i mean, "weak" :), and my sister knows how to be just fake enough to spend an hour or two w/me a month. (in secret of course).
anyways, i'm rambling. i hope a little empathy helped. :)
SB
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Dagney
I've been going through this for the last week. Normally, I am left quite alone and live well in my life after JW. Right now, the gossip and slander is getting to me.
I haven't decided quite how to handle it.
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Anti-Christ
That's the disadvantage of online forums like this - I pop off with advice when I don't know the whole story.
Please don't apologize, it is good advice. I appreciate ALL of your comments. I like to have many different point of views, it does help. The reason why I come here is because of the freedom of thought you don't get in a hi controlling social groups, like you know who.
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BCberean
I'm sorry you are going thru this.
Does it feel like the 'grief' process for you and if so I suppose you may still be in the 'shock and denial ' stage.
There's a depression and anger stage...hopefully we don't express our anger innapropriately because that just leads 'them' to believe what they've been taught about apostates.
Big (((HUGZ))))
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truthsearcher
Hortensia: I thought your first comments were beautiful:
I wonder what would happen if you wrote him a note that says "I know you didn't really mean those awful things you said. I love you. I forgive you."
To me this seems a very Christ-like response to a very emotional conversation. Of course Dad is scared that you are going to leave Jehovah and will say anything to try and get you to return.
(((((((Anti-Christ)))))) don't give up on your family but pray that their eyes will be opened too.
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jeeprube
I've had several similar conversations with my mother, so I know what kind of pain and abandonment you're feeling. If anybody should know that you are a good person, it's your parents. When I first expressed my doubts to my mother it was amazing to see how quickly her love turned to hatred. I went from being her son to being her enemy within five minutes, I've been a JW my entire life, and I still did not expect this kind of visceral reaction.
Seeker is right about the house of cards, and I believe the GB realizes this. That is why they work so hard to control the minds of their followers. Once you see that just one JW belief is false the entire belief system collapses.
I try to tell myself that my mother cannot control herself, that she has been trained to react like she does; but, that it still hurts to lose your family because you just don't believe their way anymore.
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flipper
Antichrist- Mr. Flipper here. I really feel you. My heart goes out to you. I have an older brother , self righteous ex-Bethel elder and older sister ex gilead graduate who won't even have me in their home, even though I'm not dfed, just stopped going to meetings 4 years ago. For a parent to say what he did to you, means he is controlled by a devilish, demonistic mind controlling cult. I'm a ex- witness but I would never say that to my witness daughters. Just because people have the label on them that they are alledgedly "christians" does not make it so. If you ever want to talk antichrist feel free to pm me, I'll give you my phone number. Peace to you my friend. Peace out, Mr.Flipper
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lavendar
Now he starts to say that the "apostates" have nothing but hatred to offer and that JW have only love to offer
Is this the "JW love" he's offering??......to strike out at you and shun you forever?? Unbelieveable.