I agree that fear and pride are the big motivators, especially for their evangelism. (I make a case for this in my essay) That's why they get so weird when they preach at ex-Witnesses like us. They are basically demanding that we give them reassurances in their own faith and act as if we owe that to them. They want to know that we are 1) unhappy since we left their truth 2) in denial about the "fact" that we can't hack it in their truth 3) are just believers in denial, or something similar. They often invent evidence to support these views by misinterpreting what we say and do when they go all self righteous on us. Ever had a confrontation with an old Witness friend, only to hear a very different version of those events from the Witness later on? That's kinda what I mean.
Whenever they pull this on you, never let them use the "But I'm only trying to save you from Armageddon!" line, or the "I'm doing it because Jesus says I have to!" line. Make them take responsibility for their own bad behavior instead of foisting it off on God or Jesus, or otherwise hiding behind their religion. They pull that crap on me every time.
IsaacJ