want to know what's weird?

by ninja 39 Replies latest watchtower bible

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  daystar

  How about getting a haircut? I know of two situations in the bible that definately prove that we have to let it grow!

  I never considered that! I wish I'd thought of that when I had my long hair and my mom kept bugging me to cut it.

  Yes, what the Witnesses have been taught is that logic applied to one scenario does not have to work when applied to another, similar one.

  This logic was applied to rationale for not celebrating birthdays, that the only ones mentioned in the Bible were for bad people, and that "the day of a man's death is better than that of his birth" or somesuch.
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  Sarah Smiles

  Because they were too busy taking their kids at the top of mountains. You know to have baby back ribs, ekks! mmm that sounds good!
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  BFD

  Is there mention of hemmoroids in the bible? Now that's wierd. Afterall, weren't they all sittin around on the cold ground and stuff?

  BFD
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  aSphereisnotaCircle

  Is there mention of hemmoroids in the bible? Now that's wierd. Afterall, weren't they all sittin around on the cold ground and stuff?

  Ok where's that scripture where they all got piles, and to appease Jah and get him to take away their piles, they made images of their piles out of gold, and then hauled them around by cows with suckling calves? Anybody remember?

  According to the Society, "piles" are roids
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  aSphereisnotaCircle

  This is the gawddamn funniest thread I've seen in awhile.

  But talk about an inside joke, try to explain to a worldly why this is funny.
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  Lilycurly

  Yes!Yes! I do remember that part about the five golden hemmoroids!!!

  In the french version of their Bible, it's even the actual word they use! The brother that had to read that in front of the whole congo was so embarassed and it was pretty hard not to laugh at the simultanously silly and disgusting mental picture.

  1 Samuel 6:4! Please someone get it in English! Damn, those tissue paper pages are so hard to turn!
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  Sarah Smiles

  I started thinking about your post, Do you know what I thank was weird is that dolls were carried around by children. Why? Because they were idols.

  How many J.W. girls and boys had dolls? I did! How come the JW allowed us to carry Idols? Because they were not considered idols during our time. Hmmm. I just found it interesting that the biggest wrong a person can do in the OT was to build an idol then bow down to it.

  A History of Dolls

  Dolls have been a part of humankind since prehistoric times. Used to depict religious figures or used as playthings, early dolls were probably made from primitive materials such as clay, fur, or wood. No dolls have survived from prehistoric times, although a fragment of an alabaster doll with movable arms from the Babylonian period was recovered.

  Dolls constructed of flat pieces of wood, painted with various designs and with "hair" made of strings of clay or wooden beads, have often been found in Egyptian graves dating back to 2000 BC. Egyptian tombs of wealthy families have included pottery dolls. Dolls placed in these graves leads some to believe that they were cherished possessions.

  Dolls were also buried in Greek and Roman children's graves. Girls from Greece and Rome dedicated their wooden dolls to goddesses after they were too "grown-up" to play with dolls.

  Most ancient dolls that were found in children's tombs were very simple creations, often made from such materials as clay, rags, wood, or bone. Some of the more unique dolls were made with ivory or wax. The main goal was to make the doll as "lifelike" as possible. That ideal lead to the creation of dolls with movable limbs and removable garments, dating back to 600 B.C.

  Do you all remember that we could not own a good luck doll, yet we still had our dolls. I think it is kind of funny now!
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  Sarah Smiles

  Perhaps this is not about making sand castle in the wilderness, but it is something about children and their education.

  Here is some information I found about the Hebrew children. When Abraham was looking for the promise land, the Mesopotamia children were attending schools. “Because of their semi nomadic way of life, few of the patriarchs and their descendents learned to read or write. But these skills were common among more settled peoples. For example, at Mari, an Amorite capital on the Euphrates River, some 20,000 clay documents have been discovered, along with the ruins of an ancient school. Students sat on the backless benches and wrote with styluses on heavy clay tablets. When a student finished on his tablet, he could erase his work by simply kneading the clay until it was smooth again.”

  Unlike the Mesopotamia children, the children of Abraham had to memories the oral tradition about their ancestors. Some scholars believe that Abraham may have heard the great flood from clay tablets.
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  Stealth453

  Does this mean there won't be any beachballs in the New System?

  Only the ones married to CO's.
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  erandir

  Every reference to dogs in the Bible is in a negative connotation. Using the JW birthday logic, can one assume that a true worshipper of Jehovah should not own a dog?

  undercover, I love this! I'm going to use it to show how silly the ban on birthdays is to my wife. She appreciates my sense of humor; maybe this will work where past reasonings have failed.

  The bible dosen't mention anything about cars either. Mmmm, wonder where that leaves the dubs when they go out in field service?

  There is something in the bible about putting an end to those ruining the earth. "... and to bring to ruin those ruining the earth.'--Rev. 11:18. Hmmm...car exhaust...pointless driving to and from return visits to find they aren't home instead of calling or mailing a letter...driving big-a$$ suvs out in field service for 2 hours at 5 miles per gallon.... I kind of half-liked the mormon version of field service whenever I saw it in comparison to our version: just 2 guys in the whole congregation at a time...riding bicycles.

  Oh, and btw, I am still trying to stop thinking about wtf a sculpture of a hemerroid would actually look like? I mean...is it just the swollen blood vessel on a stand...or like a sculpture of the whole thing, cheeks and all...kind of in a bent over posture like what the proctologist sees during an exam.... Ewww...sorry for the bad imagery.