by ladonna 60 Replies latest jw friends
Ana, I just found this thread and now I am sick, and sitting here with tears in my eyes. That letter was truly the most unloving, unGod like, evil bunch of words I have ever read. Don't you dare feel "dirty" or "ashamed". He is the one who should feel that way. Not you!
I say this with all honesty--I would rather die than live one day in paradise with these people.
Hold your head way, way up and sing!
April
"Love never dies." Voivodul Vlad Draculea (from Bram Stoker's Dracula-1992)
(((((((((((((ana)))))))))))I luv you sis!!! Tina
'Boycott Shampoo! Demand the real Poo!
``Apostate'' literature a problem for thee WTBTS? Foreget it; they give us too much credit; what they publish and what their dimwitted followers say that is far more damaging. At every level, they are their own worst enemy.
Ladonna dear, your dad's diatribe is but one egregious example; show that letter to any prosepctive Bible study of theirs and see if it doesn't stop them in their tracks.
Never forget that you are loved.
Ladonna-
My heart goes out to you. I know that you are hurt and scared. Your lifeline gone. But I would like to say something that hopefully will give you some encouragement.
I have no qualification other than having to go through the same thing you have. But these thoughts get me through rough days.
One thing you have to be thankful for is the fact that you are strong. Somehow, our parents instilled in us a way of finding strength in the worst of situations. Whether they liked it or not somehow we got the ability to be individual thinkers. Even though when we left the Org we may not have known exactly what was driving us out, we knew that we needed to be gone from that awfulness. Somehow we were strong enough to stand up and get out. Somehow, we were strong enough to look into our past and find out the Truth about the truth. WE, who have lost our families in the Journey, are STRONG. WE, who have been kicked so often while down, think on our own. WE have our OWN mind. WE are NOT controled. WE ARE STRONG! WE ARE INDIVIDUALS! and WE ARE NOT ALONE! We are here and we are together. We are lucky. We are no longer being led. We are no longer followers.
So now our lives begin. They begin in the light. The light of awareness. The light of knowledge.
We can go forward. And we will. Because we are strong. We are individuals. And we ARE loved. By each other.
Love always,
-P-
I hope this helped in some small way.
ugh, ladonna -
I just got home from work and am so struck by the events you have endured in the past couple of days.... you are probably hanging in there minute by minute at this point.
It is clear that your parents (cough) are so invested in controlling you and your behavior that they will stop at nothing, no matter how disgusting, deceptive, malicious, evil, and murderous - just so they can claim "loyalty" to something they don't even understand.
They have pitched you right into the mouth of the god Molech and burned you up... I'm sure they are crying out for "comfort" from the powerful leadership because of their great "sacrifice".... all the time feeling internally smug and vindicated because of their loyal devotion. Their spiritual balance sheet is now WAYYYYY heavy on credit. Perhaps your father will earn his eldership position over this one.
I have read many things documenting human misery resulting from the head-fucking that the WTS practices, my jaw hanging open in abject horror, but your story is one of the most salient and disturbing.
Please, find peace, somewhere, somehow. You (nor anyone, for that matter) are not deserving of such atrocities. THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU. THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU. This is about distorted, twisted pathological behavior in the name of some freakazoid religion.
You go on, surround yourself with healing and safe friends, and live well..... wish I could do more for you right now.
love, lauralisa
It's only water from a stranger's tear (Peter Gabriel)
Ladonna,
I'm so sorry for the pain you must endure. I know this hurts. It's so sad that we sometimes don't get the love from the people we are seeking it from. But at some time you must move on to those who will return your love. You're doing the right thing. You will find the love you need, here, or elsewhere. I'm so happy you are finding the strength to face the anger and disappointment and move on in your own life on your own tearms.
I too was hurt deeply by your Dad's letter. I appreciated Pandora's comments and I hope you found them encouraging as well.
All my love and sympathy,
Sean
Ana,
I don't know what to say other than what I said to you in chat. If you don't mind I am going to keep a copy of the letter to show to anyone I hear of who even thinks of joining that religion. I can't inderstand anyone being so heartless.
Shari
"I don't want someone in my life I can live with, I want someone in my life I can't live without."
Hi Anna,
I tried to e-mail you, but do not know if it went through. Our 'e-mail' sight was down this evening then on again then off again.
Interesting 'Post'.
Outaservice
Dear Ana,
I share in your feelings of pain. What could I say to you that would make a difference to ameliorate your pain? Let me start by telling you that this is one of the most evil aspects of mind control by JWs. Your parents lack compassion due to their emotions being controlled and their love perverted by perverted teachings of love.
Your family is simply parroting what they have been told they should do as good Christians. They are followers of followers, victims of victims that are victimizing you with their skewed view of reality.
In this forum you have found your spiritual family, we care more for you than your biological family. Your love of truth has come at a great price, it is worth every rejection you have received and will receive. When you transcend this level you will feel no pain but compassion and forgiveness for what your family has done. You are a spirit being full of love and light that when you shine on the darkness of your family they attack you.
You are currently going through an evolutionary phase and this too shall pass and refine you in your evolutionary journey. It is part of your destiny to learn the lessons firsthand that you will teach others. The school of experience is the greatest teacher but the tuition is prohibitive, you are about to graduate with honors, your date with destiny awaits you go forward.
Dear Victor,
Thankyou for your kind words. There is little anyone can say to another at a time like this, but with all the love I have receieved here......how can I complain. How can I not help others in return.
I know that this "had" to happen one day in my life. I was expecting it. I was not prepared for the venomous manner in which it came.
You are right. I am going through many changes right now. This is another change. Like many other hurdles I have had to cross and get over; this one shall be no different. I am fairly good at picking myself up and dusting myself off when the need arises.
I am aware I am entering a life change. One that is quite profound.
In fact all the way through this there was someone helping me from afar. Someone who's soul touched mine and never let me forget that love existed in the world.
I hope you do not mind me thanking him in this note to you.
Everyone here has shown such great compassion; such brilliant advice...thankyou.
Thankyou Victor.
Ana..who won't go down so easily
