Love And Marriage Was The Watchtower’s Way An Advantage?

by The wanderer 44 Replies latest jw friends

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    Rich,

    I am also in agreement that what went on in the bedroom was nobody's business.

    I was always appalled that anybody would think they have to go ask these "experts" anything in this area.

    LHG

  • zack
    zack

    The Watchtower wants loyalty to it first and then to your marriage mate. It knows no bounds. It also creates a wholly unrealistic role for both husband and wife.

    If either of them fail to live up to Watchtower demands, then they are seen as failing in their "God-given" role. This leads to stress and unhappiness in a marriage.

    These people are evil, man, evil.

    Also, where in the Bible does it say a couple in a committed relationship HAVE to be married to have sex? Marriage wasn't the sacrament it is today until the Church (yes, that

    Mother of a Harlot according to the WTS) in the voice of Augustine railed against "debauchery", something he had practiced until his "redemption." Also, the term wife used in Genesis is

    a legal term used to describe a female companion when no legal terms or arrangements existed.

    Let adults make up their minds about their living arrangements. Who is more righteous? The man who abuses his legal wife or the man who cares lovingly for his companion?

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Wanderer..The purpose of dating,is to find the right mate.As usual the WBT$ finds one more way to screw-up a natural process.It keeps confusion and unhappyness alive and well....As long as your confussed and unhappy,you need someone to guide you.The WBT$ is happy to guide you to more unhappyness and confusion.....This loving arrangement was brought to you by,The WBT$..LOL!!...OUTLAW

  • The wanderer
    The wanderer

    Dear Outlaw:

    I think it is great that we could disagree on
    so much and still be friends. (LOL)

    Thanks for posting your thoughts though Outlaw
    your allot of fun.

    Respectfully,

    The Wanderer

  • proplog2
    proplog2

    Half the witness marriages end up in divorce about the same as "worldly" marriages.

    Marriage is a crap-shoot. This is how it works.

    There are 4 possibilities.

    1. If you are too similar in personality you will be bored leading to a break-up.

    2. If you are complete opposites you will fight so much you will hate each other leading to a break up.

    3. If you are similar enough to get along but different enough to make it interesting you will probably stay together.

    4. If you are somewhat different so that there is a degree of conflict but similar enough to resolve those differences you will probably stay together.

    So you see you have a 50/50 chance and it doesn't seem like religion keeps anyone together. It just prolongs the misery when you are destined to separate.

    True, social pressure can keep miserable people in a permanent relationship but it can be a living hell. Actually, the social pressures of staying in a bad relationship probably lead to the end of a marriage because of early death.

    Nature will win everytime.

  • Scully
    Scully

    I think in a perfect world monogamous relationships are high up there on my list of ideals.

    Unfortunately, in Watchtower World the strict enforcement of chastity prior to marriage sets people up for disappointment and frustration. I would have preferred the option to experiment sexually before making a lifelong commitment to someone. That way I would know what I could reasonably expect in the context of marriage.

    The other thing that happens is that JW people "in lust" feel pressured to get married to avoid the sin of fornication - and sometimes make very poor choices in whom they marry, often before they know the person well enough to determine whether they are going to be in an abusive relationship. I feel that it would be better to allow them to be sexually active in the context of a long term relationship rather than force a commitment between two people who are not suited for each other.

  • Bumble Bee
    Bumble Bee

    Very well put Scully. I couldn't agree with you more!.

    BB

  • anewme
    anewme

    I also agree with Scully's thoughts. Very well stated.

  • Nowman
    Nowman

    Here is my opinion. I also believe in love and marriage, but it helps to be truly in love with someone. Because of the society's rules about dating (only if your intentions are to marry), I found too many young people in the org got married too young. 18-19 years old, this is too young. Even myself at 18, I wanted to marry so bad just so I could have sex.

    Marriage is what two people make of it. My parents were strong JWs, and it ruined their marriage, in addtion to the two people involved. For me, my 1st marriage failed, which I feel I was too young to get married (I was not even a JW at that time), I really got married because I was prego with my 2nd kid! Just seemed like the right thing to do. Now that I am older, my kids are older, and I married again at 29, mentally I was ready to commit myself in my marriage, you know?

    No, I do not believe in the JW process of marriage.

    nikki

  • anewme
    anewme

    Think about it, do you think dragging a hard working couple out of their beds every Saturday and Sunday morning works to the betterment of their marriage? NOT!!!!!

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