ANYTHING EXCITING EVER HAPPEN AT YOUR KINGDOM HALL?

by anewme 99 Replies latest jw friends

  • Paralipomenon
    Paralipomenon

    At an assembly during the talk there were attendants scuttling all over the place. Then one brother goes up, takes off his jacket and goes underneath the platform.

    He's down there for about 20 mins then comes out and goes away. I figured they were having issues with sound connectivity. Then they stop the assembly and a brother goes up and explains there has been a bomb threat.

    We are all instructed to gather up everything we have from our seats and they provide instructions for evacuating the stadium. It is blistering hot outside and any little piece of shade was taken up. We wait for about a couple hours then are told we'll be going back in.

    In order to get back in, you needed to display an assembly name tag or be with someone that could vouch for you.

    We all go back in are commended on evacuating the stadium in a orderly fashion and in fact, it was the fastest evacuation ever. Hail Jehovah!

    It hits the papers the next day that we were all evacuated and everyone was pissed because it was a short article that just stated the session was interrupted and it took over 2 hours to get everyone back in. Obviously Satan worked for the newpapers.

  • anewme
    anewme

    Ive shared this before......

    Once I brought a young woman to our house for the Book Study. I actually drove over to her home and picked her up. She had something wrong with her. I mean, what was wrong with me not to be more cautious, but I ignored some very obvious signs of insanity on her part. Anyway, I brought her to our home Book Study.
    We all got seated and she began to interrupt my husband who was conducting.

    "Do you have something you wish to contribute to the group?" my husband politely asked her.


    "You look like Abraham Lincoln!" she blurted out.


    "Really." He glanced that glance at me I had come to know.

    "Well my name is not Abraham Lincoln, it is Br. *******. Do you know where you are?"

    "Yeah, Im at a damn Bible Study!" and she proceeded to stand up and pull her jeans down and moon everybody her bare bottom.


    Well, that was it for me! I jumped up and grabbed her and pulled her jeans up and marched her out of the living room and out the door and into my car and drove the nut case home!


    I dutifully returned to the Book Study about 15 minutes later to resume the Revelation Book Study.
    More unbelievable than the girl's behavior was the fact that no one ever mentioned it and everyone just left quickly when the meeting was over.

  • juni
    juni

    Yes. There was always somthing going on........ one of our members was schizophrenic. He meant so well, but on occassion things got a little out of hand. The elder body helped him w/keeping on his right medications. And of course, we sisters were the Jezebels according to him. His prayers lasted no less than 15 minutes.

    We also had a few problems w/unbelieving husbands who would come into the Hall looking for their wives when the mtgs. ran over time. That was not good. One husband was so irate he did damage to his wife's car's engine.

    Just a couple of things that I can remember right now....

    Juni

  • poppers
    poppers

    "adult crap accident expert" ROFLMAO!!!

  • anewme
    anewme

    I just shared the other day about the time the sweet befuddled older Br. T***** who got up there to the podium and thanked the guest speaker for "the very stimulating intercourse" and then proceeded to close the meeting with prayer by begging Jehovah to "forgive us for our fallen shorts"

    Oh God! We were all just kids then and it was a hot summer afternoon in a sweltering stuffy old kingdom hall. We laughed our guts out for years with that one! Precious moments.

  • EnlightenedMind
    EnlightenedMind

    One time when I was about 6 years old, I was playing with one of those elastic ponytail holders during the meeting. I accidentally shot it like a rubber band, and it hit the neck of the sister who was sitting a few rows in front of me.

    As soon as the meeting ended, one of the elders got up on the podium and called everyone to attention for an announcement. He held up the elastic and said that if anyone knew who it belonged to, they should come forward.

    My mom said, "Isn't that yours?" I was terrified that my parents would find out I wasn't paying attention during the meeting! I told my mom, "I dont know. I didn't get a good look at it." lol

    Mom wasn't buying it. She went and claimed the thing, got the story, and made me apologize to the sister, who made a big fuss about it like I'd done it intentionally or something.

  • anewme
    anewme

    Oh EnlightenedMind, how embarrassing for you as a child to undergo that public chastisement!

    Some people just have no patience with the antics of children. I do not believe in traumatizing children as a way of correction. True they will remember the embarrassment, pain and hurt, but not the lesson.

  • anewme
    anewme

    Ok, well I have to go to the bank. Carry on with your funny, horrific or exciting stories and I'll be back in a few hours to read them all.

    Thankyou for supporting my thread this morning! This was fun!






    Anewme

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    Nothing really unusual happened at the KH where I was going except an anointed JW used to give occasionally some apparently odd and unrelated answers to the WT study questions. Once he gave this reply: "from this day onwards I begin to shave the barber". Otherwise in a nearby KH they had a breakin once.

  • FourMs
    FourMs

    I keep having stories come to mind, so here’s another.

    When I was a teenager I was visiting my best friend and went to her meeting. The sister that studied with her was sitting in front of us. She was so prim and proper it wasn’t even normal. Anyways, she bent down and let the hugest fart you ever did hear. She quickly sat straight back up and acted like nothing happened. It’s funny when you hear a kid let one go, but to have a middle aged sister do it, it’s hysterical! We were the giggly type, so do you really think we could be quiet about it? Not really…

    FourMs

    (sorry to be so frank about passing wind )

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