I went to the Memorial.

by RichieRich 97 Replies latest jw friends

  • GoddessRachel
    GoddessRachel
    Dude are you seeing someone to talk about all this.....you seem to have way too much anger going on here!

    I don't think he seems too angry. This is all very fresh. He seems the normal amount of angry to me.

  • BlackSwan of Memphis
    BlackSwan of Memphis

    Maybe this has been said, but I am curious what you were wanting to get out of it.

    When asked how you feel today, you said at peace.

    I am curious though, what was the purpose you intended?

    I am sort of mixed on my thoughts on this. Two days ago, as I formulated in my head what I would want to say to my family, it hit me. Each of us must choose, have chosen, between love and what we need to do to look ourselves in the mirror. You have done so, and so has your mom.

    Each of you must live with your choices.

    Be certain Richard, I am NOT making a judgment call, as I said, I have mixed feelings on it.

    It has been said that your mom has chosen this religion over you. In her head, she has chosen GOD over you. Do you expect her to do less? Would you ask her to do less? It would be one thing if she were not so misled in her heart and was blatantly choosing child molesters over you, but from this point where I see it from, that is not what she is doing. She is choosing God, Jehovah God over you.

    The reason I am mixed, is because your past posts regarding her have given me the impression that she has an abusive nature possibly. In this case, your relationship with her is less about God and the JW's and more about abuse.

    It's complicated to me. But this is not about me, it's your life. So I can only say if you got what you needed to move on out of this, then that is good. I can't know if how it affected your mom is good or bad, I hope that it will make her think and that I hope that I am wrong about her being an abusive mother, that was just the impression I got.

    Regardless, I am glad that you had such loving support at your side.........

  • The wanderer
    The wanderer

    Dear Crumpet:

    I guess we all have a different perspective on
    matters and that is what makes us so unique.

    The woman that is your mother, fed, educated,
    clothed, and tried to do her very best in the
    way she saw fit.

    In RichieRich's life it was the Jehovah's
    Witness way of life.

    There are millions of children that do not even
    have parents in life and I try to look at the
    positive aspects of life and I show my grateful-
    ness for it.

    The woman that is your mother could have aborted
    you, dump you out in the street, or could have
    given you up to an adoption agency.

    Just my opinion on the matter ...

    Respectfully,

    The Wanderer

  • RichieRich
    RichieRich
    but I am curious what you were wanting to get out of it.

    I was looking for some closure. Just reintroducing myself as a new person, free of their influence.

    When asked how you feel today, you said at peace.

    I feel like I accomplished a lot more than I had planned. And I'm not regretting any of my actions (although the dress socks were kind of uncomfortable, I wish I had worn a looser pair).

    The reason I am mixed, is because your past posts regarding her have given me the impression that she has an abusive nature possibly. In this case, your relationship with her is less about God and the JW's and more about abuse.

    She was abusive. Very much so. But it was always Bible backed abuse. If everytime you beat a kid, or verbally abuse them, you conclude with an hour or two diatribe about Jehovah- what sticks in that kids mind? For me, the religous indoctrination was somehow used to justify the abuse. Hence my anger at this religion. So I see the abuse, and the religous stuff, as being all together.

  • arwen
    arwen

    Great post, Richie. You really should write a book someday. I am sure it was good for you to go and show the "friends" that you are making it on the "outside". You are supporting yourself and have a lovely lady on your arm. Hang in there and all the best to you and Erica. Love Arwen

  • RichieRich
    RichieRich
    There are millions of children that do not even
    have parents in life and I try to look at the
    positive aspects of life and I show my grateful-
    ness for it.

    The woman that is your mother could have aborted
    you, dump you out in the street, or could have
    given you up to an adoption agency.

    Very true, the Wanderer. In the scope of things, I lived a decent childhood. My mommy always hugged me, and Daddy never threw me through a wall. But does that mean that the effect of being raised in this religion wasn't severe.

    And my mother did do her motherly duties. But she's sort of supposed to. If a police officer pulls you over, can you justify speeding by saying that you paid all your taxes?

    I donn't think it works like that. it doesn't for me, at least.

  • The wanderer
    The wanderer

    Dear RichieRich:

    At least we see eye to eye on certain things
    to which you deserve credit.

    "Very true, the Wanderer. In the scope of things, I lived a decent childhood. My mommy always hugged me, and Daddy never threw me through a wall. But does that mean that the effect of being raised in this religion wasn't severe."

    I understand your point and I am glad you
    understand mine as well. Peace.

    Respectfully,

    The Wanderer

  • kerj2leev
    kerj2leev
    I don't think he seems too angry. This is all very fresh. He seems the normal amount of angry to me.

    I guess I wasn't refering to this post only, but what I have read and observed by his actions!! I just thought it might be a good idea to see someone to help him in dealing with his emotions!

  • Atpeaceatlast
    Atpeaceatlast

    Well, every year that passes since my exile, I have thought about going back to Indiana to the congregation where the boy I was involved with to see how things are still the same and add a little excitement to his and his family's dull life as JWs by showing up for the memorial in a hot red suit and then walk out and drive away. It's a strong urge, but so far, I haven't. Sometimes I believe that the devil or the same evil force that compel me to run is trying to drag me back.

    I'm glad that for this year I didn't go.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    I didn't go, for the first time in my life and my children's lives, as well. My son stayed at home and my daughter and I went to the church to do the final rehersal for the Easter production "The Power of his Love." I feel that that was the point of memorial, not the passing of food you can't even eat. That doesn't make any sense to me, passing food no one is alowed to eat. What's the point of that, anyway? They leave out the most important part of the memorial which Jesus required for everlasting life: eating his "body" and drinking his "blood." Passing the emblems was only so Jesus didn't have to put it into their mouths himself. Passing them around doesn't mean a thing, symbolically. I think Catholics do that with the wafer being placed on the tongue by someone else. But, really, JWs do miss the point. Strain gnats (meaningless and some dangerous ritualisms) and gulp cammels (twisted, self-serving style of something they call "love").

    Remember, that my faith has been squashed down to nothing except for my belief that someone intellegent must have created this. So, when I speak of Jesus, it is with a hope that he was and is real and also that my faith in him will exist again. It takes more than just telling a person that he is real. It takes time and experience with his love to know it in the "heart."

    Chenoa

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