by Caine 76 Replies latest jw friends
Hello true believers
Had JC meeting. Will be reinstated next meeting. I thought I would be excited....not sure how I feel. People will probobly treat me like dog shi* anyway. Im hoping more field service and stuff will help the depression. Perhaps trying to do more field service is the cause of depression. :(
I just hope i can keep this up
Are you doing it for family? How long have they made you eat crow? You wouldn't be here if you didn't sense something was wrong. Don't fret. Once you get a further taste of the cold shoulder you can always fade. Meanwhile, inform yourself here. Its an amazing antidote.
hi caine
i dont get the point of this post or your reinstatement
orb
Im hoping more field service and stuff will help the depression.
Why do you keep looking on the outside to fix something on the inside?
abr
Hi Caine
At least getting reinstated you will be able to talk to family and friends again. Don't feel pressured to go in FS. No-one can force you.
penny2
Hi Caine
You probably don't feel excites about being reinstated because of the doubts you are having.It will be hard having to pretend but i can see fully why you'd want to go back for your family. Once your'e reinstated you can always start to fade slowly, eventually become inactive in fs as having to talk to others about the religion when your'e doubting it yourself is really difficult. Best of luck to you anyway and don't forget you can always come and get it out of your system here! Debbie
Caine, I understand the need to 'get back in' if your family & Friends are shunning you. However, you have seen how unscriptural disfellowshipping is. They showed you no brotherly love, have they? Were they actively concerned about your spritual welfare? Rhetorical question, sorry.
Being depressed is a symptom I experienced 'inside' the Borg because I could not achieve the standard required. Not enough field service, or personal study. When I had doubts and asked for help I was told to study the Watchower more deeply, do more field service.
I suggest you follow through and get re instated if that is what you want. But you have seen how the WTB&S is lying and covering up. Do you really want to part of that?
I sense you are in a bit of turmoil. Tell us everything, you will get good advice on this forum.
Hang in there
God Bless
Smith
Caine,
I have been DF for 2 years now. After severe depression, 4 suicide attempts, intensive care in hospital twice to repair the damage i did (including open heart surgery after shooting myself), i know the emotional pressure that losing your family brings. I was 5th generation JW. That amounts to hundreds of relatives who still are JW. I am the only one who is not.
It took months in a mental hospital for me to recover and accept the loss of my family.
A year after leaving the JW i started attending an AOG church. I LEARNT THE TRUTH!!
"The truth" is not with JW.
I could have my family back easy. Sit up the back for six months, look "repentant". Piece of cake.
But, i could never turn my back on Jesus.
He said you would lose your family on account of him. (luke 12:53)
You've read the posts here. You know whats going on. Even if you go back and "fade", you are denying christ.
Sounds harsh, true. I am not gong to face Jesus and have him ask me why i didn't say something to you.
The pain of not having your family will never go away, but you can learn to deal with it. There is help, and prayer.
Why??
I tried the same thing once and regreted every second of it. I am sooooooo glad I told them to pound salt in the end.
