Yesterday I went to the doctor....tired, weight gain, checkup, etc etc. This is a new doc so I had to fill out all the forms, family history, where I was born, jobs I have had, underwear size etc etc.
As I was filling out the form, family history, FATHER.....illnesses, deceased. I don't know, don't know my father. Siblings, age, sex, illnesses, deceased. Brother 33, deceased, suicide.
As I continued to fill out the form tears came to my eyes, looking back on my past. Doc comes in and sees the tears, She knows.....and says, the past is sometimes hard to look back on.
So tell me Ms purps, tell me why you are here today. Blah, blah blah, had a bad year........daughter two trips to ICU for overdoses, car wreck, had to put my dog to sleep, relationship ended with a man that I was wild about......plus he was my best friend. Brother died, Mom going blind, financial crap, the list seems endless.
Ms purps you are a very strong woman to come through all this as you have. We talked some more and she asked if I went to church. I said well no..........have not been in two years. Should I tell her??? OK........on top of everything else I have had a bit of a spiritual crisis, I was raised Catholic and switched to JW. I'm trying to get out of a cult. The JW's helped me alot but through this part, what I needed was not there. She said, When I go to church I need to hear something encouraging, something that will make me feel good, not how bad I am, I already know that.
I said yes, it has been very depressing. She said that the religion was very oppressive. To let her know I was not superwoman I said I have some good friends and I go to a message board for X-jws that is very supportive. Anyway, she recommended counselling to help, encourage and she said.......just to make you feel good about making it through all this.
First of All, I want to say, we really cant underestimate what we have been through. It was a shitty way of life in many respects and no matter how hard we try, that past will sneak up on us and grab us in the butt. There is help and support out in the WORLD, they do understand.
Second, I would like to share my appreciation to this forum, the people that participate and share knowledge and open their minds and hearts. Coming home at the end of the day, dealing with lifes problems, I found the board.......funny, informative, sad, encouraging, loving, hateful, watched people work through problems, get help and grow. I don't know how I would have survived if not for you.
Thank you very much.
love,
purps
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.0.1) - Cite This Source
op?pres?sive / ?'pr?s
?v / Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation [ uh-pres-iv ] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective
| 1. | burdensome, unjustly harsh, or tyrannical: an oppressive king; oppressive laws. |
| 2. | causing discomfort by being excessive, intense, elaborate, etc.: oppressive heat. |
| 3. | distressing or grievous: oppressive sorrows. |
