Hey EO, I remember you (very distinctive avatar!).
We were so young - we didn't know each other, we didn't know ourselves... I hung on faithfully for 2 decades... not knowing myself... not even really knowing what love was, because the Watchtower didn't tell me... long story short, we get along better now than ever before - she actually has become inactive and rarely attends meetings - if only I was honest years ago, things may have been different... but the cult makes you put on a veneer and a "happy face" and you can't even be honest to yourself much less your spouse about how you really feel - don't want to cause trouble... the cult makes you weak and fearful... don't want people to think you are spiritually weak or have them gossip...
Wow You're so right. I didn't let it happen to me, I had the chance to marry very young and pioneer in poverty but it seemed like a bad idea at the time. Still, even after that it took fifteen years to get out. Recently I listed all the good opportunities I'd passed up, to get out with a lot of support. We could all do a lot of that, there are so many what-could-have-beens that it can become a depressant.
Here's the thing; you've finally realised, seen through it, and started to grab life. People who do this in their eighties are still grateful that they get the light shining in on their life at some point. You have learned so much and have such great opportunities now.
You've got to write down everything you think for a while, because it can become so complex and overwhelming you might start thinking you can't cope. I spun myself up for a year until I started getting it on paper when I read an article about working through things like this. I'd write down the things that were troubling me, a big list. When I'd said everything, I'd then counter each of them with an alternative thought, or a different perspective on it; a better way of seeing it. If a new one came to mind, I'd add it, and then counter it. It turned out that it wasn't an infinite amount of problems, it was actually less than 80! :D And each of them had an upside. It helps in so many ways; to know that these things won't be able to overwhelm me, and that I have the strength, talent, imagination, support from friends; everything it takes to deal with them all.
Keep it together.