How DARE he?! This is why I'm still Single!!!

by stillAwitness 51 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  Super_Becka

  What's the problem in not growing up? ;-)

  
  

  
  OK, I'll give you that one - there's nothing wrong with "not growing up", I don't ever intend to do it, either.

  But I do think that one can be mature while still being "young at heart" and having lots of fun while you're at it.

  Someone once told me:

  "You can be child-like without being childish."

  Wiser words have never been spoken.

  "Growing up" is highly overrated, but maturity isn't.

  -Becka :) (of the "don't ask me what I want to be when I grow up, I don't ever want to grow up!!" class)
• 

  Virgochik

  Right on, Becka! Wise words, indeed!
• 

  John Doe

  Becka, it's been my experience that young women seem to think of men as being juvenile. However, that feeling is reciprocal in many respects. There are plenty of juvenile women also. I think you're probably seeing men as juvenile because of your age group. Wait a few years, then you'll see they're not juvenile--you just don't like them. lol
• 

  SWALKER

  I emailed him the D'F video that was posted by schne_belly a few weeks ago and he just laughed over it saying "what's up with you guys anyway? If that was me I would of cussed them out and got my dog to attack 'em" Then he went on about how ex-jw's allowed their minds to controlled and now they want someone to blame.

  Stilla...I know it's not funny to you, but to someone on the outside...it's looks ridiculous!!! You're bf has the right attitude and it's the way most "normal" people would see it. (I thought the video was funny as hell!) Maybe you two have a different sense of humor and I can see where you both are coming from. (I can also see how someone would not think it's funny!)

  After you have been out for a while and get the noose from around your neck, you'll probably see things in a different way. It's best to always try and talk through these things and if you can't come to a meeting of the minds, then it may be best to go your seperate ways.

  As far as wanting someone to blame...some do, and then some get on with their life and never look back! In all honesty, we did allow the WTS to exercise mind control over us...some longer than others.

  Swalker (If I ever get DF'd, I'll try to video it class)
• 

  Super_Becka

  There are plenty of juvenile women also.

  I'll also agree with that. I lived with the same girl for my first two years of university, and she was the most immature, juvenile female I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.

  My boyfriend at the time was my age and also very immature and juvenile.

  Maybe that's why he hooked up with her without dumping me first. Now they can me immature and juvenile together.

  Personally, I like to think that I'm very child-like in a lot of ways, I still like to have fun and I can still be like a little kid when I'm having a good time, but I think that I can be reasonably mature when I need to be, too, and that's more than I can say about most guys my age.

  -Becka :)
• 

  stillAwitness

  Everyone makes a valid point (even you John Doe ) Well, I'm heading off to bed and we'll see if the little douchbag calls..then I'll apoligize and explain to him all about my Life as Cult Member: The Untold Story
• 

  Thegoodgirl

  I remember, I used to almost use the "I just got out of a supressive cult" as a pick-up line. Not really, but it did draw the guys in. Most were absolutely amazed, and wanted to know more. It is all ridiculous if you think about it. But hey, StillAWitness, you're young. YOU didn't get sucked into a cult, YOUR PARENTS did. Tell him to remember that.
• 

  Kristofer

  Being someone from the outside, I can tell you, he truly doesn't grasp or comprehend what it means to be a JW. My ex...which I am hoping will come back one day is the reason I am here. There was so much that went on...so many secrets, mysteries..a complete lack of intimacy and emotion that was just foreign to me. It is the reason why I am here and it is the reason I choose to talk to the JWs that have now been regularly coming to my door for the past 3 months. It's therapeutic. It is helping me understand why everything was the way it was. Even though I feel like I can grasp it I know I still don't fully understand. And when I say understand, I mean the ability to empathize, not just sympathize. It's hard for many guys and just many people to put themselves in other peoples' shoes and really see the world through their eyes. Your boyfriend doesn't get it and may never get it. You may need a different support system while you are making your way out of the organization.
• 

  MsMcDucket

  Stilla did you ask him if he believes in God? If so, why? Then tell him that's stupid. Then say "How could anyone believe in/or not believe in God"? I bet he'd think you were a crazy-psycho-b*tch from hell. Then tell him that you were raised in this religion that you didn't choose it.

  And if the guy doesn't understand that, kick 'em to the curb!
• 

  wanderlustguy

  They don;t get it, period.

  You're going to have to sit him down and very directly let him know how serious this subject is for you and make a line in the sand about it. If he is going to work out for you, he's going to have to take you seriously, which it sounds like that is missing right now.