How DARE he?! This is why I'm still Single!!!

by stillAwitness 51 Replies latest jw experiences

  • stillAwitness

    Well, I was dating this guy and its been a long time since I have even been with anyone that I thought was worthwhile. I've been focusing on other things and with everything else going on with trying to gain my independance I just have not wanted to get caught up.

    Anyways, how dare the guy I was seeing call the whole JW mind-cult issue "stupid" when I tried to explain to him why I am the way I am (awful social skills, the simple excitement from just being around a new scene, etc.) So, I emailed him the D'F video that was posted by schne_belly a few weeks ago and he just laughed over it saying "what's up with you guys anyway? If that was me I would of cussed them out and got my dog to attack 'em" Then he went on about how ex-jw's allowed their minds to controlled and now they want someone to blame.

    He just doesn't get it and I am tired of trying to explain it I need 100%support from somebody who will be there when i finally make my exit and I just can't seem to find that. And my friends wonder why I'm still single.

    Anyone else ever have that same problem? That those in the outside world just don't get it?

  • Mulan

    I think you need to understand that the way he sees it is the way a person not part of the JW's is going to see it. We've been out for almost 10 years and I know exactly what he is saying, and agree with him. I wonder all the time why we put up with it. It's all so ridiculous.

    But..........when we were first out, it was hard to hear the criticism from others who haven't been there, and I was kind of offended. It didn't seem appropriate for them to make the comments they did. Now I get it.

    Ease up. I'm sure he thinks he is being supportive.

  • stillAwitness

    Perhaps you are right..he did say he did not mean anythign by it after I yelled at him for laughing.

    It still hurts a lot though because what we all go through or have been through is a very serious matter and I felt like he was poking fun.

  • outoftheorg

    I think Mulan is right.

    I remember talking to a lawyer about the df'n and how the whole cult teaching is.

    His first response was something like," Well what the hell were you doing in a cult".

    It is difficult for the normal folks to understand us jw's or ex jw"s and how easily one can be sucked into one.


  • SixofNine

    Take him out in service next Saturday.

  • DelTheFunkyHomosapien

    If hes not supporitve PISS HIM OFF. It is strange for someone on the outside looking in. Don't worry about being single either. A miserable relationship is nothing to be wanting over.

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    Sounds like someone is high maintenance. ;-)

  • Dune

    I've often thought about this issue and my future.
    Chances are whoever i end up with (if they arent an ex-witness, ex-cult member) wont understand just how much control this organization had our my lives.
    BUT then again, its probably that this particular guy doesnt have the maturity to understand something as complex as this.
    I'm pretty sure there are people out there who do understand what we went through and will be able to appreciate our need to vent. Just keep looking ;-).


  • John Doe
    John Doe

    Have you ever seen that movie How To Lose a Guy In Ten Days? Think of the scene with her poodle or cat or whatever it was. ;-)

  • Golf

    What's controlling you, emotions or reason?


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