My poor wife has been quite stressed knowing what to do with her life. She has never been intellectually interested enough to study whether the WTS is the truth, just went because it seemed the best way of life and her family and friends are in it. When I stopped going she did not know what to do wanting to keep both me and the congregation happy, and becamed fairly irregular at meetings and field service.
Never once did the elders arrange to speak to her to encourage her to keep going or to try to get my 13yo daughter to go. But I thought once I got disfellowshipped they may start pressuring her to keep going without me. So it has come as a surprise that they still have not spoken to her.
What is worse, and has really upset my wife is that some in the congregation have started to shun her, even though she is not d/f and never speaks about the WTS. She has been tossing up what to do and I see her becoming more and more disheartened with it all. What I could never do to her faith discussing doctrine the sisters are managing to do with their total hypocritical lack of love.
My 19yo son has been inactive for about three years but goes from time to time. He went to the convention, and now has an earing. No one went up to him to say how good it was to see him, but one brother approached him to discipline him for being so disrespectful to Jehovah. How is that for encouragement?
Even if the WTS does not go totally under in the next few years I think it will be so filled with selfrighteous powergrabbers that the genuine brothers will know it is time to search for real truth.
They have started to shun my JW wife!
by jwfacts 25 Replies latest jw experiences
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jwfacts
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lonelysheep
She doesn't need that stress!
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Xander
Well, FWIW, that is basically what got my wife out of it. She decided to stop trying to make conversation with others, just went to a meeting once and sat down, to see if anyone would come up and talk to her.
That test (which the hall failed - naturally) pretty much put her off the whole thing. Kinda pointed out to her that the WTS offered no TRUE friendship - just superficial conditional 'friendship'. Which isn't really what she wanted.
At the time, she still believed in the Bible (a bit), and the line about knowing Jesus's followers by their 'true love' made the dichotomy between what they WERE and what they SAID they were...quite clear.
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montana96
This happened for a little while with myself and I husband. I did all the research that led us out and he just listened to what I had found out. For a while he kept going but his heart wasnt in it. Once the doubts were ther it was just a matter of time. What your wife is experiencing is not uncommon amongst JWs because I have done it as well. When a partner leaves and 1 remains you treat them differently,not sure what to say or do. Your wife is in no mans land and eventually she will probably stop going once you show her how much you are enjoying not being at the meetings and how less stressed you are because their is no pressure from being a JW.
All the best and hi from sunny NSW
Mercedes x
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greendawn
The GB have got in place some really powerful control mechanisms, even if you become inactive they marginalise you, to pressure you into becoming again an unpaid salesperson of their publications.
Even if each JW does ten hours per month that amounts overall to 60 million hours of work at zero cost per month or 720 million hours per year. -
zagor
Feel the love of "real christian congreagtion"
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wednesday
What I could never do to her faith discussing doctrine the sisters are managing to do with their total hypocritical lack of love.
jwfacts
No truer words were ever spoken. They run people off so many times. I never knew any of the lies the org told until after I left. it was b/c of lack of love.
I am sorry for your wife and kids, but when one member becomes what they call apostate, they punish the rest of the family b/c they feel they will probably go that way eventually. In truth, they are pushing your family out b/c they feel you have too much on them personally and since they can't really hurt YOU now, they will hurt them.
in the end, it wil benefit them b/c it will release them from the bondage they are in.
weds
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Honesty
I am sorry for the way your wife is being treated, jwfacts. It used to bother me too until I realised that they are just following orders from their overlords.
Even if the WTS does not go totally under in the next few years I think it will be so filled with selfrighteous powergrabbers that the genuine brothers will know it is time to search for real truth.
It is already happening. Look at all the lurkers who are starting to post lately.
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garybuss
Try getting your picture on the front page of the daily paper in a Jehovah's Witness exposure article while operating a JW hotline advertised in the daily paper and see how many social invitations your Witness spouse gets. Spouses of high profile EX Witness are not treated very well by the Witness people. -
IronClaw
I have just the opposite problem. They welcome my wife and daughters with open arms. But they have been shunning me since My brain starting working. Over a year now, and still no visits or calls from the Hypo's to try and encourage me. Oh Well.