Bizarre JW stories of enduring hardship

by Vormek2.8 43 Replies latest jw friends

  • misspeaches
    about Australians shoving tracts up wallabies arses and abbos finding them and getting the truth

    LMAO @ KatieKitten - I can't say I ever recall that on our experiences at the arsemmblies...

    Meanwhile mum had it pretty rough when we were littlies. Dad was out working busting a gut to support his family but the pantry was bare... Mum prayed to the great Jehobar about it and miracously the next day our Grandfather (anglican not JW) drove over and brought fruits and vegies and meat. Of course we never got any help from the congregation (only to pray harder and make sure you attend meetings and go converting) but mum still credited this to Jehobar. Wouldn't Jehobar have provided through the congregation instead of a heathen christian religon?

  • anewme

    OMG this thread took me totally by surprise!!!
    I spit my sunflower seeds all over the screen and keyboard!!!
    So funny!
    Oh my guts are hurting!
    This is so true! These stories were held as sacred among the JWs.

    You see, how could we share these stories with anybody else?

    Right now my husband wants to know what I am laughing my guts about .....and frankly
    I cant share this with him.



  • G Money
    G Money

    Oh yes all the TRUE stories of poor African brothers in the desert walking uphill 20 miles to the meetings in heavy snow. How fortunate we are.... to not believe the crap!

  • Undecided

    I remember once when I was in my early teens, during the summer vacation from school, the whole family pioneered. We had been out all day in service and didn't have any food for supper and someone said Jehovah will provide. I made a comment about it was about time he did. When we got home my aunt had cooked a good meal and brought it to our house and it was on the table when we got there. It made me have faith then, but I know now it was just coincidence. Ken P.

  • stillAwitness

    @confession that is pretty bizarre. never heard that one.

    I'm sure they embellish these stories quite a bit. If not, well then those still in this cult are really in trouble.

  • anewme

    I actually have my own bizarro story!

    When I was a cute 20 year old witness I rented a teeny little cottage in a very bad part of town.
    One day I came home to find it burned to the ground.
    The fire marshall said it was arson. (Someone piled up wood against a wall and set it on fire.)
    I lost all my earthly possessions. I also had no money.
    The congregation took up a collection and gave me $250 to find another apartment.

    Down the street from my cottage was a for rent sign. I looked at the apt. but the manager said she needed the first $250 down, the last and the cleaning deposit of $150.

    I sighed and told her I could not afford the apt.

    Then she asked me what my religion was?


    I am one of Jehovahs Witnesses.

    I knew you were by looking at you. My granddaughter is too and she is the finest girl on earth.
    Tell you what, you can have the apt. for $250 and I'll trust you for the last and the cleaning!

    That was my story.
    I actually have 3 stories.

    I have another story about the time I was pioneering and sharing a place with another sister.
    I ran completely out of money and my Corvair died (bled oil to death)
    I prayed so hard to Jehovah to help me! What was I going to do?????

  • calico

    Confession------I remember my mother telling me that story, too. I wonder if it was from a publication or the platform--maybe a yearbook. Those stories always scared the crap out of me! Supposedly, they did horrible things to the women's private parts, too.

  • yaddayadda

    I once saw a documentary on television about a hindu religious devotee who literally rolled sideways on his body for miles and miles, even up a hill, to go and render obeisance to his Hindu god. Same mentality as that brother.

  • katiekitten

    I could never see the point of those stories.

    We were always being regaled with trials of endurance by those bloody African brothers who never seemed to have a KH within a respectable distance - they always had to have one at LEAST 30 miles away, never on a road but through a forest or a track, across a river if possible to allow for super righteous feats of swimming with book bag on head or canoeing against the current in crocodile infested waters. With a bit of luck there would be a band of robbers on the track / river / forest who would be so impressed at the brothers super righteous feats of endurance that they would swap chickens for literature and promise never to rob again.

    I used to think - but we live in a first world country with cars and buses. What do they want me to do? Leave the car at home and pull myself along by my lips to the KH in another town?

    I also used to wonder where these people got all this time from to make a 60 mile round trip to the KH. How was I supposed to match that when my first world routine imposed on me a 9 to 5 existence, Monday to Friday. Where was I going to find time to convert bands of robbers on my 3 hour hike to the meeting? It made no sense whatsoever.

    And those bloody torture stories! How awful. Im sure they were probably true, lots of them. But what was the point of terrorising a whole generation of children in countries that were unlikely to ever experience that kind of backward brutality. I mean - is it likely that I was ever going to have bycicle spokes pushed through my genitals in the UK? But thats EXACTLY what I spent my entire childhood in fear of! There was no point to those stories, other than the fact that nasty old men used to love repeating them from the platform and got some kind of gruesome kick from imagining that we might have to go through that one day.

  • Spectrum

    A JW was miraculously teleported through a fence as he closed his eyes and prayed to be saved from a gang of hooligans that were after him.

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