What could I say?

by pennycandy 38 Replies latest jw experiences

  • jgnat

    I like ALL the avoidance ideas. Remember, too, that people are naturally self-centred, and often ask these questions out of habit, not genuine concern. A quick, "Enough about me, what's happening with you?" Can distract them completely. This, tied with Billygoat's, would work wonders.

    If they get any nosier, a sharp, "None of your business, this is Grandma's FUNERAL!" works wonders.

  • Poztate
    If encountering one you suspect might like to fade too, you might say "No, and if u want to discuss it privately after the services I would love to have a coffee one on one." Thus leaving the door open for a 'witness'.

    Dang that witness mentality popped up again.


    It sounds like you were one of those who counted your coffee breaks in your time.

    Wish I had been that smart...

  • Eyebrow2

    I like billygoat's response the best.

    Hopefully you won't get the question. Perhaps you will just get the "we miss you" yadda yadda yadda comments. I always was embarrassed by the love bombing when someone that hasnt been in a while or who was df and came back experience.

    Good luck...

  • Flash
    What would be some low-key, situation-appropriate responses?

    "Not now, I just lost my Grandmother...we'll talk another time." (perhaps deflect it back to them with questions) "When do you think this system will end? ...Will it be long before the ressurection??" Get them talking and "expressing their faith" and supporting and encouraging you in this time of grief.

  • DavidChristopher

    What did Jesus do when they questioned Him?

    What did Bill Clinton do when they questioned Him? How do you define "attendance"?

    Why is ignorance used so much as a defense against wrongdoing by those in power, yet the little people rarely use it? Ever wonder that?

    If a little person does it, they are "stupid", if someone in power or authority does it, they are "slick"?

    Same action, different definitions?

    How far can you "challenge" a accusers "definition" of your action? Where is the final authority that makes these "definitions" "truth"?

    Can you use a powerful persons past mistake and resulting definition, to defend your own? "How to you define "prostitution". How do you define "political corruption". Can you prove they are different? Can you prove they are the same acts committed by different people? What would happen then?

  • DaveNwisconsin

    Go to the local Halloween supply store and rent a nuns outfit. You won't have to worry about being bothered by any of them!

    I think its rude when folks come up and say where have you been? I am sure they know by your loved one who passed that you are no longer in the fold. When my JW mother passed away the family had her buried through the Catholic church. Only one JW showed up so it was real easy on the family. One may say, "But that was her faith and you should burry her through that" Well sorry but the survivors in the family don't believe in the same kind of death so it would have been a kick in the head to even listen to the "asleep" speach.

  • Lou_Cypher

    How about "What meetings?... Whats a kingdom hall?".... then say 'ahhhhhhh those... ' and nothing more...

    That will make you the talk of the moment right after the next meeting... but then again havent we all been that since the blindfold fell and the brainwash meds wore off?


  • Pistoff

    NO one has ever asked me; my wife says I intimidate people.

    MY own elders are afraid to talk to me.

    LIFE is good.

  • Billygoat
    I think its rude when folks come up and say where have you been?

    During a really hard point in my life, I got asked this question by a friend that hadn't been responding to any of my emails. I asked her back, "I've been here in my life, having a really hard time this past month, needing my friends to support me. Where have you been?" I hate to say that I still relish her expression and silence after I said that. She knew enough to exit gracefully and quickly.

  • Tuesday

    I know it sounds wierd but if you don't want to cause a stir just lie your little ass off. My Grandmother's funeral was a little while ago and I had a bunch of Witnesses pretty much corner me and ask me a bunch of questions similar; "When you coming back?" "Are you going anywhere now?" I just told them stuff like "Well I have a job where I'm working until 10 or 11 at night. Which I actually work till 4:30. Or "When are you coming back?" "Oh soon I guess, we'll see". If they didn't know I had left I would've just said something like

    "What congregation are you going to?"

    "I haven't been too good about it but I go to (name the nearest hall) when I get a chance, you know still trying to work on my move and also my job prevents me sometimes. You know how things can be."

    They'll think you're not a strong witness, but nothing more.

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