I love these Jehovah's Witnesses

by freedomlover 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • freedomlover

    before any of you jump all over me about how I could love ANY JW's let me explain and just vent here.

    some of you may have ready my hubby's post about us leaving the area. work, and wanting to fade has made this necessary. well, some of my dearest friends and family held a small party to wish us well. no one here knows about us mentally being way gone out of the org. they all still think we are good Jah loving witnesses. I was around these people and I feel hollow and kind of feel like the whole situation is surreal. I can't believe these people who I know and love, and who know and love me, can't see what a totally different person I am now.

    I feel like a hypocrite.

    I feel like a warrior.

    I feel immense loss.

    I feel immense sadness.

    sadness for me, for my children, for my friends, my family, the loss of dear people. I've been with some of these people through some of the biggest moments of their lives. yet, in just a short while, there coldness for me will start to show. the impact of what reality is for me is starting to take shape and it feels like such a huge monster at times. I feel like I won't have the strength to win this one. I know I will. I always come out okay. It's the spoils of this war that I am mourning already. all the loss. so much to mourn about how much we loss in this battle.

    I know this is a place to vent, and deal with anger over all we have lost. however, today, I would like to say: I love these Jehovah's Witnesses. not because they are JW's but because they are human beings who I have a connection to, and whom I have come to love. Some of them are closer to me than my own family. I think we need to remember these people as other human beings whom we love and will continue to love. I suppose I'm trying to teach myself where to place the anger and resentment, and I want to remind myself it's not directed to these people. I don't want to JW bash today. I want to love JW's today.

    this is for all those I have to leave behind. you all may think I have a choice that I could have stayed in the org. I don't see that I had that choice. knowing what I know now, there was no choice for me. it was the consequence I was forced to take. please know my love is always there.

    from third eye blind -" you want to know how deeply my soul goes? deeper than bones....deeper than bones....."


    thanks to all of you for reading and just being around on this board....my new friends, in my new life.

  • jgnat

    Yes, there is no harm in being real. There are some very nice people in the Jehovah's Witnesses. I hate the machine that forces them to do evil things. But individual witnesses? No way. Except for the bullies who have stumbled on a "good thing".

  • fullofdoubtnow

    I know what you mean freedomlover. I had many friends in the congregation, and most of them shun me now. It made leaving so much harder, knowing that would be the outcome. The meetings and doctrines I don't miss at all, but I miss being with people who, over the years, I have grown to love. It makes me hate the vile organisation that conditioned them to behave in such a way towards me even more.

  • cyber-sista

    I understand,

    my baby sister is still in there and some of her kids and some old friends, most of them people who want to do what is right in life and believe they are doing so, but are misguided and manipulated by the WT strong arm. Still love some of the people, but hate the Org that controls them.


  • DavidChristopher

    I don't think Jesus would shun and judge them either. I think he would rejoice greatly and be proud of us for "opening" their eyes, and asking them to go ask Him some questions for a change.

    Jonah would get pissed though.

    Who would you rather work for?

  • AuldSoul

    (((freedomlover))) It get's better. My family came over last Thursday to say goodbye, I have been chopped off their lives like the brown bits at the end of a celery stalk. It was once good, clean vegetable appreciated as much as the rest. Now they see it as bad and possibly poisonous.

    I refused to tell them goodbye. I am not leaving them, I am leaving their religion. My door is wide open to anyone who respects me and my home as much as I respect them and their home. My tender affections are not cramped for room, their's are.

    Your post is great for showing the difference between individual JWs and the organization that warps them. Left to their own they would not act the way this organization makes them act. That's why I want to focus on getting the word out about the destructive and dangerous influence of the Corporations that are abusing these people.

    Love who you love, don't let anyone make you feel ashamed of love for anyone.


  • Golf

    Freedomlover, you feel the way you feel and I respect that. Your in the best position to know your circumstance. Take whatever time you need to make a decision.

    All the best.


  • JamesThomas

    freedomlover, a beautiful, warm and loving post. Thank you for sharing.

    It is your love for your dear friends -- that loves not because of what they believe, but rather for their shared humanity -- that may very well be the light that leads them out of darkness.

    When they begin to shun you, love them all the more. Fill the chasm that they make. Keep the passage open.

    But then, you already know this.


  • SPAZnik

    I understand.

  • blondie

    (Luke 13:34) . . .how often I wanted to gather your children together in the manner that a hen gathers her brood of chicks under her wings, . . .

    Yes, Christ still loved the people who knew would soon as a group have him killed. I see the blindness of many JWs, misled and lied to, trusting and being betrayed. I hope that some day their eyes are opened.

    Love, Blondie

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