I still have warm feelings and memories of my dub friends from long ago. I think about them often and wish things could be different. Yes, those people were cold to me when I left, but there were a few years in there when the friendships were sweet.
I love these Jehovah's Witnesses
truly- thanks to you all - it means a lot to read your comments.
I refused to tell them goodbye. I am not leaving them, I am leaving their religion. My door is wide open to anyone who respects me and my home as much as I respect them and their home. My tender affections are not cramped for room, their's are.
i like this a lot. thanks. part of me wants to just disappear and not say goodbye. not give them a chance to hurt me.
I don't want to play by their rules. I want to be the bigger person. thanks for setting such an aspiring example for me.
Some of them are closer to me than my own family. I think we need to remember these people as other human beings whom we love and will continue to love.
That is a wonderful sentiment and it deepens your losses while leaving the org. It must be difficult to feel that way but good at the same time.
You may later find that the bond you feel was built upon superficial and false pretenses. That is what happened to me, but it does not happen to everyone. I guess it depends upon the sincerity and kindness in the core personality of your JW friends.
your sincerity and conviction may be what is needed to help another.Even just one other.Welcome to a new life!!Pete
Most Jehovah's Witnesses are nice people and sincere truth seekers but they've just been brainwashed by false hope and told by the wts they need to be become one to please God and gain salvation. If only they would open their minds and realise that non-jw's are not 'in the world' and we are no futher away from God than they are.
Excellent point, lime05
Acts 17:26-28 — And he made out of one [man] every nation of men, to dwell upon the entire surface of the earth, and he decreed the appointed times and the set limits of the dwelling of [men], for them to seek God, if they might grope for him and really find him, although, in fact, he is not far off from each one of us. For by him we have life and move and exist, even as certain ones of the poets among YOU have said, ‘For we are also his progeny.’
I sooo understand. I love my friends, we've been through decades of ups and downs together, and I miss not being with them like I was before. I dread the day I will be shunned, and I know it will hurt them to shun me. I don't want to hurt them, either.
Hang in there. We're your friends!
What a loving, tender-hearted Christian you are. Your attitude is admirable.
Our Lord Jesus instructs us even to love our enemies. I like Blondie’s point: “Christ still loved the people who knew would soon as a group have him killed”. Feeling and expressing love will never hurt. Love and affection attracts, hate repels.
My dear wife and I can empathize with you. We understand that you “feel immense loss, immense sadness.” We too, after many decades in the organization had to detach ourselves from the system. We also made many wonderful, genuine friends, who even though we have faded are nonetheless affable to us. Some of our relatives are still deeply involved in the organization. Our gradual egress made it possible for us to tenderly plant seeds, with excellent results in some instances and may yet completely free some from the bondage of the WBTS. Confrontation rarely produces productive results. Though, each person must decide what is best for them.
Please do not feel like a hypocrite; you are not. By not being excessively confrontational you will be able to assist your friends more affectively and help them see what you are seeing. Our Lord Jesus was patient with his followers, so we too should understand that their mind has been blinded by the propaganda, consequently they are unable to absorb the enormity of the change required to come to the realization that they have been misled by the false shepherds.
By presenting to them the facts in small increments, as the occasion arises, you will be showing them love and kindness. We know, it is a terrible blow to discover that the individuals at the top whom we trusted implicitly have mislead us; the shock is too great for some to absorb, then they burrow in deeper into denial. Consequently the steady approach may bring better results. Patience is required.
I really love the way you are able to distinguish between the R & F and the perpetrators; the deceived and the deceivers, in the Watchtower system. Jesus had no respect for the Pharisees, pronouncing heavy judgements on them, but loved the deceived, the spiritually blinded.
May our God and our Lord Jesus give you, your husband and your family peace and wisdom as you embark on your new journey.
Warm Christian love.
I like this thread, Freedomlover. Thanks for starting it.
I too love lots and lots of Jehovah's Witnesses. And it always bugs me when I hear people suggest that "there is no love in that religion." Of course there is. Plenty of it. And there are plenty of beautiful, wonderful human beings too. Jerks? Oh sure, they've got those too. Kind of like any group of people you find.
Is keeping close to these people worth staying in this bizarre, authoritarian group? Not a chance! And I'm thankful that there's lots of wonderful people out here too.
I'm comforted in knowing that, over the next several years, it's likely that a good chunk of my former friends and family will come to find out what I have--and many of them will leave. And when they do, I'll be here to help them through it. (Should I say, "God willing?")
Freedom lover.. most of us do! They are after all our families, real and surrogate, and all the friends we've ever known.
Today in the sales I bumped into an elder and wife I am DEARLY fond of and they asked me to go for coffee, I agreed, with inner dread because I worried they were going to start nagging me about the meetings etc, but instead we laughed and talked like old times about ones we know inthe cong and silly things. And I felt a TRUE sense of loss when I stood up, knowing these people will not continue to treat me as well when it becomes obvious I have drifted away right over the edge!
Was slightly amused and perturbed that I was wearing a short (ish) skirt and boots, his wife was wearing a floor skimming one, as he is an elder that is paranoid about modesty, fortunately I had a VERY large sales bag to put over my knees..lol.
I do love and miss 90% of the brothers, but also know I cant be close to them, because I couldn't help but talk about what I know..