What exactly is not allowed

by Jdarley 33 Replies latest social relationships

  • Jdarley

    Ok, my BF is Witness, and I am studying to become baptized.

    But he and I have sexual control issues that we are trying to work on. (we cant keep our hands off eachother and control our desires)

    what exactly would get us into trouble with the congretion? I mean what do they shun? what is bad and what is okay between a couple? as long as we dont have sex are we not fine?

  • AuldSoul

    I will look for a thread from a current elder who recently came back from a school the elders attended... And here it is: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/102445/1768731/post.ashx#1768731 This thread explains a LOT of detail about what is and is not okay. The title is jokingly referred to as the Talmud, because the rules are so specific it is almost like what Pharisees might refer to for rules. Respectfully,

  • Jdarley

    okay that sorta works. so I am assuming petting is just unclean, is it a sin then?

  • AuldSoul

    It depends on the elders in his congregation.


  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Let's put it this way. If youy were both JWs you would be in big trouble.

    But since you aren't a JW if your activity becomes "known" to others then he will be in big trouble. And that could be as little as a slap on the wrist to shunning - no JW would speak to him including his family

  • zagor

    The easier answered question would be "What exactly IS allowed?"

  • IP_SEC
    I am assuming petting is just unclean, is it a sin then?

    Uncleaness can get you a hardy reprimand. Wanton uncleaness can get you watched like a hawk. To the point where they might say you need to break things off with this guy. If you dont break it off and get involved in this so called uncleaness again, it could put you in line for a Judicial Committee.

    Why not just save yourself the heart ache and stop studying now? Go to college, get a good job, make a life. Then when you are 25-30 find out what religion, if any you want. After you do that, find a guy that is compatible with your choice of religion/nonreligion.



  • serendipity

    Hi Jdarley, welcome to the forum!

    I have a 16 year old daughter and I would keep her from being alone with her bf, if she had one. If you're interesting in maintaining control, the best thing is to stay around other people and limit yourself to hand holding, hugging and kissing. Not easy and not as much fun, but much safer- in many ways.

  • under74

    I'm with IP. Stop now. And stop worrying about what's acceptable by the JWs since they only except any sexual feeling as unnatural--especially if a woman is having it.

    For crissake my older brother (not a JW anymore) still thinks women are either virgins or whores.
    Save yourself the trouble and move on.

  • rebel8

    Be aware the very stringent specific rules about sex will not end when you get married. Once married your activities in the bedroom will still be regulated, including prohibitions on oral sex etc. etc.

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