by Cordelia 39 Replies latest jw friends
You have done the right thing Cordelia...you are now being true to yourself; I am sorry that he hasnt yet come to his sense but equally I am so pleased you have made a decison and stuck with it.
Good for you!
We are with you when or if you need anything; just ask!
DB74
i know i am throwing contact with my family away and hurting them alot.
Cordy WELL DONE.
YOU are not throwing away contact with your family, THEY are throwing away contact with you. NEVER forget whose decision it is to stop contact - certainly not yours.
Its like someone saying 'if you leave me I will kill myself, and you will have murdered me'. NOT SO. Thats blackmail, and each person makes their own decision and lives by it.
Its all going to be so raw at the moment Cordy, you will probably cry a lot. But eventually the pain will ease. And you never know, in time they may soften their stance. I know LOADS of elders who have secretly kept in touch with their children even when they have been d'fed, because they couldnt bear to cut them off.
Time will heal, honey.
Congrats Cordelia. I remember how you anguished over your decision. Now breathe a sigh of relief and be happy. You deserve it!
The question:
but i have done the right thing HAVEN'T I?
The answer:
i cant live a lie!
You'll look back on this as the point where stress in your life started to really fall away and you started living.
Take care, and thanks for lettings us know how things went,
Dave
Cordelia
i feel so bad as he has tried to answer my questions and has come up with an answer on them all (except the un) and i know i am throwing contact with my family away and hurting them alot. part of me was still tempted to get reinstated but i cant live a lie anymore i want to keep proving to myself it defo isnt the 'truth' so i feel stronger coz this is so hard, but i want to give it a proper go with my boyfriend who has stuck by me through everything.
Don't think like that! They are shunning you, not the other way around. This is their way of controling/hurting you!
D Dog
thanks so much everyone, there isnt one person i can say anything too coz what youve all said was so wonderful, i actually feel ok, i may ring my mum tomorrow in veiw of her letter, but i cant believe that i actually feel ok,
what i have to do now like crumpet said is not dwell on it, and try to not take it out on my boyfriend coz that has been the vicous circle before, i expect him to be mr perfect as i have give up so much for him, and when hes not i flare up and feel like 'why have i give things up for you' then feel depressed at my choice, and i know that isnt fair on him, so im gonna try, anyone else find that hard?
anyway with the support of you guys i know i can do it so THANKS!
congratulations on such a big step Cordelia. we don't know each other however i have read your posts. i am on the other end of your situation and your posts have given me great insight to the issues my friend faces regarding a man of the world. i wish you all the luck in the world on your new journey. stay strong and positive and above all ENJOY LIVING YOUR LIFE...........telltruth
anyway with the support of you guys i know i can do it so THANKS!
We're here for you, (((Cordelia))). Just remember, the eventual goal is not dependence, it's independence. I for one know you haven't had much practice with that, but now you get to test out any ideas you've had as to whether or not it is something you will choose for yourself.
Welcome to life! It was waiting for you the whole time.
Respectfully,
AuldSoul
Cord - they are going to make it tough for a while. But someday this will be a 'milestone' day in your life. I truly hope your folks will reconsider the way they need to view this - but you cannot control them - though they try and control you with the threats and legitimate [from thier standpoint] concern for your spiritual health.
I hope you can be as supportive as your family will allow with your dad's illness, etc.
You just keep loving them without condition - they have to do what they have to do.
Thoughts and well wishes with you
Jeff
Hi Cordelia,
I have been following your story, and I congratulate you on having the courage to take the step you have. I hope you find the happiness that you deserve, and I wish you well in your future life.
Welcome to freedom
take care
dedpoet
