JW Kids Leave the Organization: Facts

by Maximus 141 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Maximus

  The October 1 Watchtower 2001 features articles on training children "properly" and dealing with a "prodigal child."

  The latest inside U.S. figures reveal that 86% of JW children leave the fold, with some 29% who eventually come back for reasons of family ties, most never "reaching out." That means over HALF leave permanently. These figures have been virtually the same for a number of years now. Well known is the fact that many kids lead a double life; that is, they put on a Witness face while attempting to live more normally away from scrutiny.

  In its usual truthful fashion, the Watchtower says: "There are hundreds of thousands of young ones who serve Jehovah happily ... Why, then, do other young ones leave?" Uh, that's over eight out of ten, remember?

  Answers: 'Losing out on what the world offers, protective sheepfold too restrictive, peer pressure, hypocrisy on part of the parents or some other Christian.'

  It's about "spiritual weakness," we are told. "Not having an accurate knowledge." "A youth who admitted that he had been swallowed up in the way of the world began to appreciate spiritual values. What helped him turn around? Responding to a suggestion to read the whole Bible, he kept to a regular Bible reading schedule." (Why don't I buy this?)

  They trot out the tried and true recommendations: "Being reasonable includes preparing the children's heart so that they are ready to accept counsel." Family study, daily Scriptural discussion.

  Why not try your family study on meeting nights? Now that's a practical suggestion! "The family was always together on the nights of the congregation meetings ... all three children are now baptized servants of Jehovah." Ah, yes, they cite the perfect family study in which a grown son says: "It was one of the most enjoyable evenings in the week."
  
  Ooops! Here's what NOT to do: "In one congregation, well-meaning adults who wanted to help some youths who had become spiritually weak invited them to gatherings to play popular music together. Though the youths readily complied [sic!] and enjoyed such sessions, their influence on one another eventually led them to cut their ties with the congregation."

  Aaaannnnkkk! No more "gatherings."

  I won't go through all the Talmudic stuff on when a child is DFd; no prayer publicly in his behalf, blah, blah. But here's a gem: "Parents MIGHT pray that if God FINDS A BASIS for pardoning the child's error, that His will be done. Hearing these prayers should help the youth to see Jehovah as a merciful God." (I have a picture in my head of God sitting on his throne, desperately trying to come up with some legal basis for pardoning a wayward kid.)
  
  Words, words, words. Their tenor is fine, but I can stomach no more. This is the same tired, tedious approach I personally have seen over and over and over again, for over half a century. Isn't there a definition of insanity as doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results?

  If only a few were leaving, why publish this article?

  What's your experience with kids who lead double lives and who finally leave the organization?

  Maximus
• 

  felix a

  Maximus,

  The latest inside U.S. figures reveal that 86% of JW children leave the fold, with some 29% who eventually come back for reasons of family ties, most never "reaching out." That means over HALF leave permanently. These figures have been virtually the same for a number of years now. Well known is the fact that many kids lead a double life; that is, they put on a Witness face while attempting to live more normally away from scrutiny.

  Is there anything more specific about the figures that you can share? Publicly or privately is fine by me. I find the numbers interesting and seem higher than what I remember them being back in the early 80's.

  Regards,

  felix a (DavidP)

  "Vision is the art of seeing things invisible"
  Swift
• 

  metatron

  They never accept any blame for their corrupt organization,
  do they?

  I'm glad to see these scandalous figures provided. They could
  never tell Witness parents the REAL truth - "the cards
  are stacked against you, you may as well give up!"

  I got together with another family and we talked for hours
  about how almost none of their extended family's kids
  are still "in the truth". Rotten elders, uncaring brothers,
  endless rules, and a hope never realized - how much longer
  can the suffering go on?

  metatron
• 

  Marvin Shilmer

  What's your experience with kids who lead double lives and who finally leave the organization?

  This elder’s experience: 99.9%, or more, lead double lives to some extent. Ultimately more than 60% leave the organization, often with most of their immediate family.

  The WTS is so concerned about these figures that they have selected a few long time Bethel elders to go out and informally interview parents and children about what is going on. If parents allow it, they tape record the session and take it back. I know some parents that have participated in this, and some of them offered pretty damning observations, like: too many meetings!
• 

  Seeker4

  Maximus, well written and well thought out, as always.

  In the 1980's, a CO visiting our congregation gave the figure that one out of eight kids leaves the Witnesses. He didn't say where he got them, but that figures out to about 88% leave - VERY nearly your figure.

  What we found that was interesting, was that my wife and I were talking about that afterward, and remembered the congregations we grew up in in the 1960's. And damned if it didn't come out to exactly one out of eight kids that we grew up with stayed with the Org.

  So I would say that your experience of half a century is similar to my somewhat shorter one - the vast majority of kids leave the Witnesses. I'm reminded what an elder in a local, reclusive cult in my home area told me. I asked him about how many of the young people raised in the group stay with it. He told me that his group would consider it the worst kind of failure if many of the children left. His point was that if the children raised in the group struggled to see it as having a superior way of life and being the truth, what chance was there that outsiders could be convinced?

  It was a point well taken.

  There is an insanity to the WTS, as you said. Doing the same things over and over, and expecting different results. More study, prayer, meeting attendance and family study didn't make a difference in the 60's, the 80's or the 90's. And they certainly won't in this new century. The WTS is doomed.

  Always great to read your stuff.
  S4
• 

  D wiltshire

  Maximus,

  Years ago when my children were still teenagers we used to invite the other children in the JW's to our family WT study, we actually had quite a crowd every saturday nite.

  We used to breeze through the WT, keep it to a hour max, then we'd just have fun(sing, play guitar, games and what ever). Our house was alway open and people would come and go.

  Of coarse I did get flack from my fellow elders, because as I'm sure you know the Society doesn't like any kind of spiritual get to-gether that isn't officially of their making.

  But since I was an elder the brothers let it slide.

  And I'm sure you know how the Society feel about large gatherings that don't have the strictest supervision. They really do their best to discourage it.

  Their were brothers and sisters that kinda sponsered these gatherings(be it bowling or rollerskating) and usually were given counsel to not do it again.

  So is it any wounder why so many youths are leaving?

  All the WT wants is free labor from these kids, someone that will give up their time and future for the growth of the Organization and if they step out of line bang DF.
• 

  ozziepost

  G'day Max,

  Nice post.

  When reading the suggestion to have a family study on meeting night I'm reminded of how much from the platform was received with raised eyebrows from the struggling parents. Their reaction? "What would they know? They haven't got any kids." I'm sure that reaction is found all round the world. Upon the announcemnet of a new circuit overseer to the circuit what is the common thought? "He's an older man with grownup children, so he must have some experience."

  The pictures in the magazines showing the ideal family (in Oz we refer to them as the all-American family - no offense meant!) actually have a negative effect because most families view that as unattainable, they'll never be like that, so they'll never be "good enough".

  Down in Sydney it became known that there was an 'underclass' of young JWs made up of 'fringe' JWs and some who are regular meeting attenders and 'token' publishers. They have their own network to arrange social activities. Certainly they are leading double lives. Elders seldom hear of their activities because their own children are excluded from invitations. I venture to estimate that this underclass is numerically stronger than the 'official' JW young ones.

  Your comment about "spiritual weakness" and "not having an accurate knowledge" is most apropos. I made these comments on MrMoe's thread "You Can Have True Faith - October 1, 2001 W/T"

  The article in the October 1 W/T is a classic in reflecting the official Watchtower attitude to the state of sinful mankind. Notice paragraph 4 of the study article on page 14. The question on the paragraph reads: "What is often the root cause of young ones' going astray?". This question is repeated in the Review Box at the end of the study. The paragraph reads: "A child's rebellious attitude and behavior are usually symptoms of spiritual weakness, reflections of what is in his heart. For whatever reason a youth goes astray, the root of the problem often lies in his not having "an accurate knowledge of truth" (2 Timothy 3:7)" What do we learn from this? That only the spiritually weak commit sins. These are the ones who haven't got enough knowledge. But is that scriptural? We know that the scripture says "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23). The reality is that Witnesses do not see themselves as sinners. Oh yes, they have inherited imperfection from Adam, but they don't REALLY sin. It's on this basis that the elders, including the PO that you speak of, would have judged you.

  Of course the organisation continues to use the enforced compliance methods that use rules as their medium. This is so much like the Pharisees of Jesus' day. The org has not come to appreciate that love is the thing that is needed along with faith. The works will naturally follow. The R&F may protest that "we need rules" but they miss the whole point of the Christian message.

  Cheers,
  Ozzie

  "Evil is the absence of empathy"
  Movie (2000), Nuremberg
• 

  buffalosrfree

  Yes, Maximus, I too read the Apostate article in the WATCHTOWER and was just roflol over the ineptness of the writers. They don't seem to have a clue, I was writing in the Mag one my wife got me through the subscription method and she was wondering what I was doing so I showed her, What more we had discussed this issue (ranted actually on her part) about how they don't have clue about young ones, I showed her all the bull nonsense, and of course she agrees but we have to remember that they are imperfect men (geeesh) I say. Well thanks for your thread, and I have greatly enjoyed and will continue to do so I'm sure you insight into this thing, this borg. Buff

  "F" em all but nine, six pallbearers 2 road guards and one to count cadence.
• 

  Maximus

  Marvin,

  Why do I get the feeling that there will be many reports going back in that thank the "faithful slave" profusely for this fine fact-finding mission? Damned if I didn't get letters from the Society asking my "frank observations" DECADES ago. They paid no attention whatsoever.

  What is the primary, most important teaching of the organization today? Hint: it has nothing to do with preaching or the established Kingdom.

  Although it made up of infallible, imperfect men,
  THE GOVERNING BODY IS INFALLIBLE AND MUST BE OBEYED
  under penalty of enforced shunning.

  Not for one moment do I think the GB is going to pay attention to the most earnest and sincere kid who says there are too many meetings! These kids have a bad attitude; go back and read the W 10/1/2001 for suggestions.

  Uh, Seeker, was that one out of eight REMAINS you meant to say?

  Felix! Sent you a private note re sources of figures.

  Maximus
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  HoChiMin

  Maximus;

  Without question kids are leaving, no their gone, and most not to return. That's a good thing. Remember back in the 70's young boys fought for the front row like a donkey after the carrot for any piece of the cookie crumb that broke off from the big wig on stage. It only took a few decades for them to realize the real truth. The front rows are empty. All young ones are leaving in droves and there is no replacements for the old cronies to be the next generation of company men.
  Must be a sign of the end ? The end of the WT as we know it.

  HCM