My daughter is engaged! So why is my heart under my feet...... (page 3)

SheilaM

((((((((((((((((Bryan)))))))))) the dubs suck....Just write a letter congratulating her on her marriage. Tell her that you would love to be there on her special day and that you love her.....she will always remember that and I suspect that she will return to you sooner than later

TweetieBird

Bryan,

Please don't give up. I wrote a similar letter to my dad when he disassociated himself. I didn't have much to do with him for a few years until he got sick, then my christian conscience would not keep me away. She is sincerely trying to do the right thing in Jehovah's eyes, unfortunately it's not the right thing and hopefully someday she will come to realize this. She is probably getting enormous pressure from different ones in the congregation.

I made peace with my dad before he died even though I was still a believing JW. After he died, the lightbulbs started going off in my head.

My heart goes out to you.

lisaBObeesa

Bryan, I am so sorry.

What a terrible, painful letter. I hope she comes around. I'm really sorry.

(((Bryan)))

-LisaBOBeesa

TrailBlazer04

(((((((((((Bryan)))))))))) My heart goes out to you. I could say a lot more, but I won't.

You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

TB

Bryan

Thanks everyone.

I shall win her over without a word.

I told her I would never judge her... I will not today.

Bryan

simplesally

As you know, Puternut was going thru this same stuff. His daughter was engaged and he was going to be shunned. He kept sending cards and leaving a message on the phone, never knowing if they got his messages and card. Now, everything has turned around, but it was not quick or easy.

Keep being a Dad and letting her know you care, you love her and you are there for her. Just wait and weep. Something will happen and she will contact you. It may be months or years, who knows?? I would send a nice engagement gift that just says: Love Dad, I am here whenever you need me. Don't push. Accept her decisions.

I can only see it like an adult child who has decided to live a life of drugs or go into the Moonies: you cannot pull them out, you have to wait until they are ready to walk out or walk near the line where you can reach them.

talesin

:: Perhaps she is giving to the pressure against what she really feels in her heart.

Yes, I feel this is exactly what is happening. She will return to you. You should talk to the Rabbit, he has some wisdom/experience with these matters.

I meant what I said about the love of a daughter for her dad. It is special, and she will not be able to maintain this stance.

{{{{bryan and wife}}}}

(sorry, Mrs. Bryan, I don't remember your name :D, but I remember you are French [yay] and beautiful on the inside and outside, and I can tell you love this man!)

Edited to say: We all support you, too! ~ heheh, I get silly and emotional sometimes, but that's me!

blobby

Hi Brian,

I'm dreading a similar situation developing here...............so I read the letter and responses with real interest.....best I heard so far is .........

((((((((((((((((Bryan)))))))))) the dubs suck....Just write a letter congratulating her on her marriage. Tell her that you would love to be there on her special day and that you love her.....she will always remember that and I suspect that she will return to you sooner than later

It will tug her heart strings .

Grog

That letter makes me so mad at the organization.

How the witnesses can consider themselves Gods organization when they are responsible for tearing families apart is mind blowing.

Many of the responses are great though.. I love the one about telling her that your love comes with no strings attached.

When you respond to a hateful letter with sincere unconditional love it really has an affect on people.

Hopefully it will make her think that her organization which supposedly teaches unconditional love is actually a sham.

This letter scares me to think of what could happen in my own family. Good luck and keep up the hope

Aimee

First of all I sincerely would like to thank everyone who has sent a supportive note to Bryan during such a hard time.

As some of you when I first read this letter, It made me... so absolutely mad... and it especiallly hurt me to know and see how it so deeply affected Bryan. So thank you all for your support, and your kind, caring and loving words. ((((((((( All ))))))))))

I wished for a while that I could have send a response to this unthinkable letter... but I realize now that it would have been a mistake because this is not about me... of course it would have felt good to release what I thought and felt... but it would not have help the situation. And as many of you suggested a loving/caring letter is much more powerful and constructive.

It is such a shame that an adorable young woman can think this way about her own father who is only at fault of wanting to help and be a caring, loving father to her. She is missing out so much every single day. Fortunately, I truly believe that one day she will turn around and realize for a reason or another that the decision she made was wrong, and will re-engage in a positive daughter-father relationship. I just hope for her that this reason will not be too dramatic and painful for her... and that it will not take her too long... too many years... because the pain she caused in our home will not go away anytime soon, or until that day comes... Thank you!

Amitiés.

My daughter is engaged! So why is my heart under my feet......

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