by White Dove 87 Replies latest jw experiences
You did the right thing. I wouldn't have felt safe or comfortable meeting a man from e-mails in a quiet park. Public places are best, and as a man and a social worker, he should be understanding of this. Could have been for coffee, could have been for a drink, could have been for lunch. He has to do at least one of these three things :)
Tammy
He's either a creep who wantd to ge you alone to jump your bones or a cheapskate jerk who is frightened to death of spnding a few buck on a beverage. Either way, you're lucky to be rid of him.
I agree that Starbuck's was the 'safer' place but a well-visited park is not bad either - in most circumstances.
If I recall, your primary reason to meet at Starbuck's is because that is simply where you wanted to meet, not what you needed or felt insecure or unsafe about.
It's a warm day. Starbucks was closer to work. And you just plain wanted to go there. But he turned it into a crazy, convoluted - what? power struggle?? put-down?? I don't know.
Congrats on uncovering the character flaw so deftly!
-Aude.
Aude,
I didn't feel all that good about meeting him in a park for safety reasons and because it is far away from where we work (10 miles), and because it wasn't warm at all today, it was HELLISHLY HOT! It was 106 degrees (107 for the next 3 days) and I was already heated up from my job. There were few people there at the park, according to him. No one goes to the parks around here during the day. People bring their dogs to dog parks at night, too.
This area is Phoenix, AZ, so you might say that walking in a fairly empty park alone is as safe as walking through Central Park alone.
It was a red flag to prefer a park at 4 pm where people wouldn't be to going to a busy coffee house, and then insisting on it.
I wonder if men sabotage these things after realizing that they didn't want to date the person, after all. Too chicken to say it out straight that they changed their minds, perhaps?
I've got no problem saying such a thing to a guy.
That last e-mail gives me a bad vibe...at best he's quite insecure....at worst, his idea of "pretty safe" doesn't exactly mesh with the commonly held perception of "safe"....
Drop him.
He seems kind of quirky....and if he was that inflexible, he is going to be difficult anyway.
Bwaaaa-hahahahahahaha!!!
I can't believe no one thought of this yet, but here goes.
His whole wanting to meet in the park, and his response of, "If you can't take the heat......." implies only ONE thing to my deviant mind, and here it goes:
The only reason he gave you an email address was to "hook up" for a quicky. A lot of people (guys in particular) like to meet in parks because there are usually secluded areas in which to have sex quickly and then leave, usually oral sex.
This guy knows EXACTLY what he's doing and what he wants, as he's done "it" before in the park. Run from this loser as fast as you can, unless you like being on your knees in front of a guy you don't know in a secluded area of a local park?
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Wing Commander
Wing Commander,
That could very well be it! Why would a well educated and accomplished man at 50 want to date a Taco Bell employee that he thinks is much younger (I am blessed with good genes)? Never mind the fact that I'm just as educated as he is.
I don't even think of such things as quickies and oral in a park because my goals for dating are totally different.
It would take the 100th date to do sex with someone, because by that time if we are still dating, there would be enough trust built to give of such a personal and intimate thing.
In fact, I suggested Starbucks last week and HE AGREED TO IT! Then, he waffled around and wouldn't commit to it. He sure committed to the park, his idea, though.
Oh yuck! Just yuck. And, he was really put off when the question of safety came up. Maybe I'm really right on with that one. Yuck. Yuck. Just...yuck.
Update:
"I just want you to know that I'm not looking for any relationship. But meeting somewhere you can tolerate the heat is just fine. The heat doesn't bother me...I just wanted to make myself clear.
WING COMMANDER WINS!!!!!! White Dove goes off to throw up...
Update:
"I just want you to know that I'm not looking for any relationship. But meeting somewhere you can tolerate the heat is just fine. The heat doesn't bother me...I just wanted to make myself clear.
WING COMMANDER WINS!!!!!! White Dove goes off to throw up...
