what to do? Grandson being beaten by JW father

by slvrtrixter 48 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • slvrtrixter
    slvrtrixter

    Well I have been a lurker on this site for some time. It is not suspicious when a child abuse situation is happening. I live in a rural area about 10 miles from my son. I called over the weekend. No one answered their cell phone. Sunday I got through after their meeting. I asked if I could come over. Sunday is their cleaning day and they had plans at 2:00 and my grandson had to be back in Madison ,WI at 5:00 pm. So I did not get to see my grandson. My grandson has a cell phone in case he gets lost with 911 number but the reception is not available at his Dad's. And my son seems to not let him near the cell phone. I am a real grandmother with a real problem. I only share this information because I thought others might know what to do. Your ideas have helped. Thanks.

  • LeslieV
    LeslieV

    Glad you are here with us. You have received great advice.

    If you ever see bruises makes on your grandchild take pictures yourself. On the picture, put the date, time you took it. your name as photographer, where the markes are located. All this is needed if used in court. Take the child to a police officer...period. It is a CRIME!!!!!!!! Let the police handle it....

    Also please tell the mom that she needs to do the same. In the state of NY this man would only have supervised visitation. She needs to do a modification of custody order. If she can not afford a lawyer many probation offices will help her fill out the paperwork. Also, have her call a domestic violence program, we do paperwork for custody when abuse is involved. Many Domestic Violence Programs in the US have lawyers that do pro bono work for abuse survivers. Keep coming back...we are here for you.

    Leslie

  • TheNaturalStep
    TheNaturalStep

    slvrtrixter, hi hope everything is fine with you. I am sorry but i didn't understand what you problem were. I may have misread something i am nnot native in this language, i am from Sweden ...

  • slvrtrixter
    slvrtrixter

    My son has asked the court to give him more visitation with his son. In fact so much he will have physical custody, along with joint. Now what? Where is there a God when you need one? This is a nightmare.

  • LaniB
    LaniB

    The photos, doctors visits and police are exactly what you should be doing so I won't add anything more on that except to say if he has bruises either take him to the doctor/police the day he comes back from the visit or the next day, otherwise you give his father the opportunity to say that it occurred after the child got home. The more visits to the authorities the harder it is for anyone to believe that this was just an accident (ie Johnny fell off his bike that weekend).

    I've worked in family law, but only as a secretary and it is in Australia. If it is of any help I'll share what I know. Most Courts here unless they see evidence will take it as a he said/she said because of the number of people who use their children as an excuse to get to their ex. If there is any type of abuse claims they take them seriously and will bring in a psychologist with custody cases if their are unsubstatiated claims to decide what is in the best interest of the child.

    In Australia the Court can and will order a family evaluation to observe the child with both father and then mother, then father and his new wife, then mother and her (if any) new partner, then the psychologist will interview the child in a very non-confrontational manner. The psychologist then give the Court a report of how the child relates to either parent, what the child has to say about the living situations and if the child appears to have been rehearsed by either party.

    I will also add that the fact that you are standing up for your daughter in law against your own son would probably be looked on favourably for your daughter in law. In most custody cases the grandparents tend to support their own child over their childs ex.

    I'd follow the advice given and document any times you have offered to babysit and been turned down or tried to see your grandson. I'd then offer that to your daughter in laws lawyer and let him decide what is of use and what would possibly (if at all) harm her case.

  • Missanna
    Missanna

    I don't have much advice but my heart goes out to you. i'm so sorry this is happening. my father was abusive to all six of us and my mother did nothing. the elders did nothing. all i can suggest thinking about what i would have wanted done as a child was go to the police get the authorities involved. i don't like the idea of video taping him because that can be emotionally painful but in the long run could help. call the police. again my heart hurts for him. please keep me posted on what happens.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Can't you send Child Protective Services out to the house? Do whatever it takes even if it's camping out on the front lawn to help your Grandson. Call in the media, do whatever it takes to draw attention to the situation. An 8 year old is old enough to speak out if he is being harmed he will tell authorities.

    Okay my rant.....poor kid I hope you can do something Granny!

    Edited to add can you find out what congregation he's in and alert the Elders there to the situation? Maybe just maybe they will be of some help.

  • horrible life
    horrible life

    bikerchic, You have a PM

  • slvrtrixter
    slvrtrixter

    Well, another weekend and my son gets his son. The attorney is hired by my ex- daughter- in -law. The grandson went to a psychologist who puts him in a group of kids who have anger problems. All happens next week. Child protective services have known since 2002. Still waiting for guardian ad litem for grandson. All takes time. So is my grandson safe this weekend?

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    Slv, I hope that if you have direct knowledge of what is going on (witness to any of the abuse) that you will report it and be willing to testify. I am sorry the little guy is going through all this, and I hope that the 'system' starts working for him soonest. Best wishes. . .

    Shelly

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