Sounds like the guy could use therapy.
ESTEE
Posts by ESTEE
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40I didn't know what a JW was, until I fell for one
by headoverheels inwhen i fell for him i was completely unaware of his upbringing as a jw and only became aware once he decided to leave a few months back.
being raised without much of a religious basis, besides the typical western christian exposure, i have researched, read, attended groups, read in this forum, to try to better understand him, and jws, but i am feeling at a loss here.
he just recently left the jws and now i am experiencing this struggle with him; i am wondering how much of our problems can be contributed to this transition.
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28
New Generation -- NO Thinking Allowed!
by UnDisfellowshipped inthe new, new, new, new light on the generation: just believe it -- or else!.
the watchtower, august 1st, 2001 issue, page 14, paragraph 8:.
"first, since oneness is to be observed, a mature christian must be in unity and full harmony with fellow believers as far as faith and knowledge are concerned.
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ESTEE
that 93 year old has very little steam left.
Soooo...is the sky falling?
ESTEE
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9
Saw a Therapist yesterday,,,,, interesting
by man in black ini da'ed myself two years ago, one of the main reasons was because my mother died and the congregation was more interested in"meeting attendance, and service" than anything else.
for the first time in 30 years the very conditional friendship offered by the jehovahs witnesses came to the fore, and i was literally blindsided by it.. several months later i attended a grief support group at our local hospital, and boy it was a real godsend for me, i realised that the so called "worldly people' could actually be nice, supportive, and lend a real listening ear.
the hospital had one of their grief support counselors lead the meeting, and she was really good at what she does.
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ESTEE
I'm so very proud of you, man in black!
I too, have had therapy, lots of it. Therapy really does help, especially when you have someone who understands what you are going through...
Keep up the growth work. It will keep you young!
ESTEE
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ESTEE
Great thread!
Being spiritual means you don't have to follow a laid-out dogma; rather, you can use your own mind and free will.
Like, when I got disfellowshipped. The moment I heard the news, a deep feeling of serenity --- peacefulness --- calmness washed over me. It was a feeling I had never experience all the years of being in the cult. In that moment I felt such a strong connection to ... something ... that I just knew I would be okay without the jdubs. I anchor myself to that feeling, knowing leaving the jws was a vital step forward in my growth.
I believe that is an example of spirituality...Had to share...
ESTEE
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34
Watchtower most widely read magazine??? Gawd
by ESTEE ini have not posted in a very long time, but here is a link i thought might be of interest.
it made our local paper, likely sent by the jws for some more free publicity.. http://communities.canada.com/vancouversun/blogs/thesearch/archive/2010/05/27/what-is-the-most-widely-read-magazine-in-world.aspx?commentposted=true#commentmessage.
i posted a reply under their comments.
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ESTEE
The JW's dumped all kinds of foreign jibberish into the comments link.
You have to scroll down about five minutes to get to the nice comments about the JW sex abuse scandal and cult information.
Last night Mr Estee and I re-watched the NBC Nightline video about the sex scandal cover-up.
The stinky pile under the JW rug grows ever-bigger ... every day.
ESTEE
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45
Honest Question..........
by thraxer68 inwell, first off, iam new to the forum here, i registered maybe a week ago???
sometime around there, but anyway, i do have an honest question.
i guess a little background about me might be helpful and if not, at least therapeutic.
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ESTEE
thraxer68, welcome to JWN.
Lots of great suggestions for survival ... on this thread.
thraxer, my best advice is to just be patient with yourself. It might take time to let go of all the conditioning you were born and raised with. It took me years of therapy to let go of it.
I suggest that you start with a talk with your family doctor. You will be amazed at how much good advice they can offer you. Also, your doctor might know a therapist who understands about cult conditioning. I realize that the jws train therapy out of its members, but therapy is something that helped me in the recovery process. Therapy helped me to see more clearly how some of my beliefs were delusional. Because, for whatever reason, my dysfunctional parents chose a dysfunctional religion...go figure. But really, my parents' choice was all part of the pattern of dysfunciton. They needed a religion to support their pre-existing twisted beliefs. It was a match made in heaven on earth.
Therapy helps in another way, too. It gives you a support system for when you finally go head-to-head with the elders. You will have somewhere to turn when the religion turns against you. It helps people exiting not to resort to suicide when all their family and friends are turned against you. After all, FEAR is the JW's greatest tool to keep you stuck in a place you have outgrown. When I finally left (via disfellowshipping) I had my therapist and a few close dance friends. So I didn't fall into a void. I had a functional life outside of the organization.
So, thraxer, you might want to allow yourself to learn all you can about the cult. Knowledge is power. JWs can no longer keep us separated and alienated from others who have left, thanks to forums such as this. We support one another here. This forum must be the bain of the GB's existence, trying to keep a lid on all the toxic stuff that is seeping out in the news, on the internet, etc... Trying to keep people from noticing that ever-growing pile of stinky stuff shoved under the rug. I mean, that rug is only so big!
Let us know how it goes, dear one.
Love
ESTEE
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23
Court orders Jehovah's Witness boy be given blood transfusion
by purplesofa incourt orders jehovah's witness boy be given blood transfusionsean fewster from:adelaidenow june 04, 2010 7:12pma hospital has won the right to give a child potentially life-saving blood transfusions despite the religious objections of the boy and his family.. in a south australian legal first, the supreme court this afternoon gave the women's and children's hospital the right to give a 10-year-old boy - a member of the jehovah's witness faith - transfusions as part of his cancer treatment.. the decision, in line with similar rulings from around the world, paves the way for hospitals to take action in future debates with religious parents.. the boy is suffering from an aggressive form of cancer that doctors fear will spread throughout his entire body if not treated with an intense 39-week regime of chemotherapy and surgery,adelaide now reported.. .
the speed of that process will not allow his blood cells time to regenerate, meaning he will require transfusions so that the chemotherapy can continue unabated.. in a statement read to the court, the boy said transfusions carried spiritual consequences.. "the doctors have told me i might die and i don't want to - but i don't want blood," he said.. "the blood will change me... when you take blood, you are taking someone else's life.. "i really don't want this and my heart is ripping apart.".
read more about the court's blood transfusion order at adelaide now.. .
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ESTEE
the boy said he feared a transfusion would "make the Creator unhappy".
Poor boy, brainwashed so young...
Love
ESTEE
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29
Am I the only one who thought the GB was 100% correct when they were a JW?
by NiceDream ina few months ago i began researching my doubts on the internet about the wtbts and i came across a bunch of crazy facts.
this helped me realize this isn't "the truth.".
when i was growing up, i believed the society was always right, and we needed to obey what was in the publications.
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ESTEE
Hi NiceDream:
No, sweety. You are not the only one who thought the GB was 100% correct in everything.
I was a devout, fully-believing, undoubting JW. I fully believed the GB were the only ones being directed by Jehovah and were 100% correct.I was caught by a fully-baited hook. What choice does one have when they are born-in? How could the only thing I knew be wrong? My parents were infallible, too. After all... how could they be so totally wrong about such an important issue?
That was, until I came head to head with the "morality issue" after my divorce. I took dance lessons, met many nice men who expressed interest in me --- and I fell for my exciting new dance partner....And got myself disfellowshipped. Now I call that a happy ending!
Love
ESTEE
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41
The Significance of Raymond Victor Franz
by AllTimeJeff inthe significance of raymond franz.
in the light of the passing of raymond franz this week, it is clear from the reaction that many were affected by the deeds of this man.
while he was called gentle by those who knew him (for the record, i never got to meet him personally) his reputation preceded him both in the ex jehovah's witness community, and still to this day at the world headquarters of jehovah's witnesses.. while his writings were indeed fair and reasonable, (i challenge anyone to read his books and find bitterness associated with him toward his former peers) i think it would be a mistake to remember ray franz as somewhat of a gentle, doting old man.
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ESTEE
Maybe we can start a new section called Tributes
Just my two cents..
ESTEE
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45
My Memories of Bethel in the Franz Era - part one
by Dogpatch infood was passed from one side and if you were #10 you may not get too much to eat!
when i finally did, she was not at all interested.
but i was lucky it didnt work out, for she never would have left the watchtower.
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ESTEE
Awesome story, Dogpatch! Thanks for sharing with us on the forum. Yes, I too think writing memoirs is a very healing and a very worthwhile project. The book could be added to the great list already written.
ESTEE