I'd have to agree, belief in God is not a pre-requisite for being open to the possibility that some part of us continues on after our physical bodies die.
Posts by xjw
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19Atheism's view on death
by ashitaka inwell, it's winter, and it's just a bit more depressing this time of year, and i'm thinking about death.
i wonder, what do atheists believe about death?
do you believe in any way that a 'spirit' lives on?
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10
I Am A Servant Of The Most High God Jehovah!
by Englishman inback in the 70's, that particularly self-congratulatory phrase became fashionable fair here in the uk.
i remember my dear old dad trotting this out when her ladyship and i got married in '73.. talk about a bucket of cold water!
a real 'spectre at the feast' comment if ever there was one!
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xjw
The JW mind set is that you are Daniel, ready to be tossed in the lions den, you are the three Hebrews, ready to be cast into the fire by this old “world.”
Sad, but true. The whole Jehovah's Witness religion is based on the martyr mentality. Ooooh poor us, we're being persecuted! Boo hoo! If the JW's weren't fighting anyone, they wouldn't be JW's. This whole thing about standing up and proclaiming that you are a servant of the most high god in order to provoke people is just another example of how the JW's THRIVE on persecution.
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9
Not Saluting The Flag Singing The Nat' Anthem, H
by Celtic innot saluting the national flag or standing up to sing the national anthem of your particular country, how did this make you feel at school and what were the reactions of your class mates?.
in your jw upbringings, any other funny, weird or mad school time experiences to share, where there seemed great conflicts of interest, and again, how did these make you feel?
with these experiences in mind, how did it shape you into an individual, and finally which specific emotions did you notice within yourselves as you were growing up?.
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xjw
I have struggled with low self-esteem for years because I felt so different. I felt horribly alienated from other people, terribly misunderstood, and all alone in the world. I thought there was something terribly wrong with me -- I had anxiety in school, I was unpopular, I was constantly watching my every move because I might have "sinned". I took the JW doctrines very very seriously. I never dated anyone in high school. I felt guilty for having sexual fantasies. I felt guilty for a lot of things, and I could never relax. I felt like I was always running scared. I am so angry that this isolation from other kids was imposed upon me. I still struggle daily with feelings of worthlessness because I still don't understand why I'm so different from other people and why I don't have the same experiences and happy memories to look back upon as they do. I still haven't experienced the joys of having a long-term relationship, partly because I have been so scared for so long to pursue something so displeasing to God. I took the "deaden your bodily members" scripture VERY seriously. Now I keep wondering why I have no clue what dating is supposed to look like, and why I feel surrounded by people who have had numerous relationships to look back upon and cherish. I feel so left out even now, because even though the past may be in the past, it still affects the present. That's the whole POINT of childhood -- it's supposed to prepare you for what's to come later on, but I feel like I was never prepared for anything and I have been thrown to the wolves to learn everything on my own. I feel so very cheated by my childhood isolation.
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It Doesn't Have To Be This Way
by metatron init might surprize some of you 'loyal' defenders to.
consider this but i think many of us dissidents.
would appreciate a strong, specific response from the.
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xjw
democratically, the freest country in the world, the USA
I wouldn't be so sure of that...
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9
XJW On Death Row Due To Kingdom Hall Trauma[:)==\=
by MadApostate insteven maurice evans,.
appellant, .
vs.. state of florida,.
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xjw
It appears to me from the information that the head trauma that produced a significant change in the man's personality had a lot more to do with his homocidal behaviour than the humiliating Kingdom Hall episode, even though that may have been a factor -- but it's certainly not the whole picture. Otherwise, I'd probably be sitting on death row too.
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43
Depression is a way of life for JW's
by butalbee inthe more i studied, the more i got sucked into being a witness, the more depressed i've become.
i don't want to do anything anymore, i mean what is the sense: the end of days is upon us!
the more i became involved with witnesses, the more i felt that i was loosing a part of myself.
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xjw
Depression exists everywhere. Of course, the potential for becoming depressed can be aggravated by circumstances such as the feeling that you have no control over your own life's direction. Membership with the JW's can most certainly have that effect on your psyche. There is a phenomenon called learned helplessness -- when you have pain that you can't prevent or control for an extended period of time, you learn to just take it and this pain becomes your "norm". You stop trying to do anything about it. This is something that you also see in abuse survivors. I believe belonging to the JW religion is a way of accepting emotional/mental abuse in your life as normal, because you probably don't think you deserve any better. If you are already depressed this can just further the vicious cycle and make you even more depressed and no longer motivated to try to get out of that situation. So my advice to ANYONE who is in this religion is: start making moves to pry yourself out of its clutches AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. It just a lot like trying to leave an abusive spouse. But with help from caring people, it is possible. I did it. Unfortunately though, since I was raised JW, I still suffer from severe bouts of helplessness, isolation, and worthlessness from time to time, but I am on a long journey to a better place. :-)
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25
Way Back When You Were A Witness.......
by LB inback in the dark ages did you used to come into message boards like this one, or h20 and try to defend the watchtower society?
i did and things didn't work out so well.
actually they worked out fine, i switched teams.
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xjw
Well since we're all sharing "coming out" stories, I might as well add my own...
I think what started the ball rolling in the direction of the KH exit door for me was the uncaring, cold, rigid attitude of certain elders in our old congregation. Then our family moved across the country to Alberta and into an even colder, even less caring congregation. Elders are supposed to be concerned when your field service hours drop to practically nil. I told the PO of this new congregation that my hours had never been that low before EVER, and he just shrugged as if to say "what do you want ME to do about it??" But his apathy was a blessing because it made me start to seriously doubt what kind of an organization this truly was. If people care more about talking about their golf games than the fact that you are losing your faith in the only way of life you've ever known and have made so many painful sacrifices for, then you gotta wonder if they're "God's people" as they so claim. Eventually we moved into a warmer, friendlier congregation, but by then my doubts had already snowballed and were gaining more momentum with every passing day. I really started to resent women's "place" in the organization, and I started to realize how degrading this subordination to men really was. Then at one assembly I got so sick of the constant harping that they do to make you feel like you're never good enough for God that I could feel tears forming in my eyes, and I left the building. From then on I attended less and less meetings, and started to spend a lot of time with my "worldly" friends, who introduced me to the bar scene among other things. This was probably the first step out -- starting to integrate into the rest of the world and stop isolating myself exclusively to JW friends. Then I started to FINALLY, for the first time, explore my sexuality. I felt sooooooooo guilty about it at first, but eventually learned to relax about it. Although there was something inside me that was telling me that I didn't feel as strongly about boys as my other female friends did. Eventually my feelings for my girlfriends exploded like a dam that has burst under too much pressure, and after an initial period of much shame and guilt, I started to identify as a queer woman. I believe THAT was the last straw for me - because we all know that Jehovah hates homos!! Or so we are told anyway. Being a JW and a lesbian are mutually exclusive things.
It's been a long road since then and even today I still struggle with the paranoia, isolation, and alienation that has been pounded into me by WBTS doctrine. Spiritually speaking, I have some theories but no set-in-stone beliefs. I consider myself agnostic now. I am slowly but surely picking up the shattered pieces of my identity with the support of my friends. As for the role of the internet in my leaving, it was only after I had left for good that I summoned up the courage to look at "apostate" sites. At first I was too emotional and angry, angry, ANGRY!! to look at that kind of information and realize how cheated I had truly been. Recently though I have developed a more objective but still engrossing interest in the history of the organization and the flaws that they never tell you about at the KH. I've found both watchtower.observer.org and freeminds.org to be helpful.
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So,what are you do`in on Hallaween eh?
by OUTLAW ini think i`ll just stay home,hand out candy to the neighbourhood kid`s and sip a molson.. the golden rule:the people with the gold, make the rule`s!
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xjw
I might go over to my friend's house and hand out candy while my JW parents hibernate in the back room of their house with all the lights shut off. Then again, I could encourage my parents to go out somewhere for the evening so I can hand out candy at THEIR house heeheehee. :-D Won't the neighbours be surprised!!
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45
I AM NO LONGER A JW STATISTIC
by Cassiline inthis has taken a lot of courage to post.
my life with the jws has been one hardship after another.
i am sharing this to help others see that jws claim to be loving and forgiving people while they are not.
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xjw
Thanks for having the courage to share your story. I am new to the board and yours is the first post I've read so far. It reminded me of how rigid and cold this religion can be even when someone very obviously needs help. It is great that there is so much moral support here - I was kind of expecting to find scriptures being quoted everywhere in defense of the JW belief system, but pleasantly surprised to find "real" people instead.