Posts by outoftheorg

95

Who else went sex crazy?

by buffy in

ok, question for all the non dubs.

am i the only one who went totally wild (sexually) when i got df'd?

well, i actually went wild when i turned 21 and became inactive.

In a situation like this it is foolish to say "wait on Jehovah". We and you are told by the wbts to turn to the elders for help. To turn to them in all matters and they are to keep the org clean and to make it a safe place to worship for all. The elders are to be looked up to as a place of refuge. They are to take actions against wrong doers. They are to protect the innocent. Nowhere are we instructed to just wait on Jehovah and not to bother with going to the elders.

We went to the elders and look at what happened. Nothing. In fact it is a slap in the face of the victims to have that evil man standing at the head of the congregation and spouting off on matters of how we should all be clean and righteous to have Jehovahs approval and several in the congregation know that he is not clean or righteous and is a child molester!

They had 5 accusors and believed 2. There are the required numbers of victims for action to be taken. The same subject came up a few years later and again nothing.

Tell me please, what is it that makes the wbts want to cover up child abuse? Why can it not be dealt with? What is it about child abuse that triggers this wait on Jehovah syndrome? Is it Jehovahs fault? I think not. Is it the fault of the holy spirit? I think not. It has to be a failure of the wbts leaders the governing body. Why? What goes on within that group that they can not deal with this issue. Is it some submerged guilt in the minds of the gb?

There is no waiting on Jehovah in other issues like Smoking-lying-causing divisions- gossip- etc. These issues are jumped right on with df ing etc but this horendous issue of molestation can go to the back burner and some time in the future it will be dealt with by Jehovah.

The lack of action on the part of the elders has caused 5 people to lose all respect for the wbts and leave the organization. If it is true that to stumble someone brings blood guilt on the one causing the stumble, the gb and the elders involved have blood guilt on them all.

Outoftheorg

Re Jesus waiting on jehovah. In times of hurt He acted now to heal the sick and raise the dead. He did not Wait on Jehovah. He took action in throwing out the money changers. He preached to the church leaders . ALL the situations that required action he did not wait on Jehovah. He acted. Are you telling me that my daughters molestation is such a minor thing that it does not need addressed now? Is Protecting the flock from this evil elder so unimportant that it can be left up to some time in the future? What if it was your child?

Edited by - outoftheorg on 24 September 2002 18:38:32

Edited by - outoftheorg on 24 September 2002 18:44:6

95

Who else went sex crazy?

by buffy in

ok, question for all the non dubs.

am i the only one who went totally wild (sexually) when i got df'd?

well, i actually went wild when i turned 21 and became inactive.

outoftheorg

Hello Sword.

One of my sons cousins told her that an elder had molested her. In looking into this it was found that he also molested one of my daughters. It was brought to the elders attention and at the end there were 5 women that lodged complaints against this elder. The elders in their wisdom chose to only believe 2, my daughter and one other.

In the elders supposed wisdom they followed the wtbts instructions and chose to do nothing. This elder remained in good standing, telling all from the pulpit how to live righteous lives. When my daughter displayed how this was hurtful to her the elders said how she accepted this was up to me.

A few years later there were more complaints of improper behaviour by this elder and my daughter was again asked to tell of her molestation. Once again the wbts chose to do nothing and he is still preaching from the pulpit as to what is acceptable conduct and how to be righteous followers of Jehovah.

When I expressed dissatisfaction with their lack of action regarding this elder, the elders chastized me for doing so and began to shun me.

Explain to me please why I or my daughter should look upon this organization as Jehovahs only true representation through the holy spirit on earth.

Please don't make a fool of your self by telling me to leave it in Jehovahs hands.

Outoftheorg

73

The long awaited Dossier on Iraq UK Position

by Celtic in

jw
friends

full copies of the evidence for the case against iraq only published today for the first time are available from number 10 downing street http://www.pm.gov.uk.

http://www.fco.gov.uk.

the ministry of defence http://www.mod.uk.

outoftheorg

It is clear that no nation on earth is free from accusations of brutality and having desires on others wealth and more.

But the more savage rulers of countries are willing to commit violence death and occupation on those they feel are vulnerable with out any limits. (the killing of masses of non combatants) and the use of weapons of mass destruction on entire populations. That is what is triggering the reaction in the US government and others. Also like it or not this is the result at least in part of religious hatred. This hatred is the most destructive evil on earth. It has been here in the past and it is here now.

A nation, any nation facing this fact has the right and obligation to act in protection of its citizens. To not act now and wait until another weapon is available to Sadam (neuclear-more bio or chem and the means to deliver them to more distant countries is an act of insanity.

It will mean the loss of lives. We have a choice. Are the lives lost to be in the US or in Irac? In Irac or the UK. or elswhere. There is no suitable choice in a situation as this. It will be terrible.

But there is one man who can stop all that. His name is Sadam Husein "however that is spelled".

Do you think he will cooperate or will he use the delays in time to give him the weapons and ability to use them on other states, and then use them??

Outoftheorg

19

Knoxville, San Diego, Weymouth Landing

by Windchaser in

i attended halls in these areas, anybody else?

e-mail me, if ya want.

outoftheorg

Hello all you San Diegons.

I lived in the El Cajon area. In what is called La Cresta or Sun Crest area in the hills east of El Cajon. Then moved to the Santee area. Left the area in 1972. Probably I am to old to have known any of you folks. Two of my boyhood friends still lived in he San Diego area. One is da'd the other is back in the borg at the threat of losing his wife if not. I now live in Idaho and haven't visited the San Diego area for over15 yrs. Have a brother and his children in that area still. As usual they do their shunning thing they do so well on me. No contacts for over 11 yrs.

Outoftheorg

46

What is God doing?

by Kagloo in

this is a genuine question... i mean no disrespect to anyone...especially to my heavenly father....but i have this gnawing question in my head that just wont go away...... okay... with that out of the way.... let's take the holly and jessica story that hit the headlines in the uk recently...two innocent kids, murdered and left to decompose in a filthy mud trench....;or worse than that, the story about the two people in the usa who have been busted for running an internet child porn site that features pix of children...babies as young as five months... five months!!!!!!

!.....being sexually abused..... if i start to think about what these poor kids went through it drives me mad!

and then if i start to think about what some kids are still going through even as i write..... welli can hardly bear it!.

outoftheorg

Hello Kagloo.

Read your post and find it interesting. Sorry that you have had such a string of heart rending incidents. It seems sometimes that life likes to kick us when we are down already with another loss.

I agree somewhat with SS and his take on things. I feel sure that there is a creator that created the universe and all things in it. I am not convinced that the bible or other sources describe him accurately. It is my belief that humans have always wanted God to be like their dream of the very best human father. One that would look after them personally and protect them. Which is what a good human father does. It seems apparent to me that God is not protecting us as individuals because of the very things you found happening in your life.

The bible refers to the situation of "time and circumstance" and I feel that describes what happens to people,and our concept of God is why we can not accept a God letting these things happen. It is my opinion that since we are not capeable of of understanding God, we use what we do know and understand to describe him. Ourselves.

I have struggled with the same things you are and I know I still do not have any real grasp on these issues and why these happen. I don't believe the real or self proclaimed heavy thinkers have a grasp on these things either.

I deal with it this way. Life is life and I have very little control over what happens. I do my best at the time, grieve the losses, revel in the gains and successes, enjoy mylife and carry on.

Best wishes to you all. Outoftheorg

26

Honestly, what would you do?

by Tinkerbell4125 in

many of you know, i have siblins that are j.w.s and some that are not.

since i disassociated myself, i am shunned by my j.w.siblins.

my non-jw siblins and my j.w.

outoftheorg

Hello Tink.

Glad to hear that your illness is one that is curable with a small operation. Best wishes.

On the issue of what to do with relatives that shun you. You are the only one who can come up with a course of action for you. I will tell you what I did to hold onto my dignity and self respect.

Some of my siblings told me they would be loyal to the wbts and shun me. So I told them that if they were to do that I am making it easy on you and you are not welcome by me at any time or any circumstance. YOU are to never contact me about anything.

Then if a family gathering comes that "I want to go to" I go and I ignore them completely and only associate with the others. If they speak to me I ignore them. IF and only if they approach me and offer to stop the shunning will I ever speak to them again.

That is MY way of dealing with the issue and may not be the right one for you.

I am not sure, but it seems to me that my actions disturb the relatives that shun me. I think it is due to me not giving them any leverage or control over me & seeing that I can have a life without them or the wbts. When I am at one of these gatherings I go out of my way to show happiness and joy and the close attachments to others in the family. I come away feeling good in many ways. Especially about living my own life and not having others poking-pulling-pushing me and letting them see that the jw's and wbts mean very little, actually nothing to me.

On other posts here I have advised others to be the better person and show all love on the occasion they brought up. I still think that is a good thing to do on the initial times this issue comes up not long after the da or df'd action is taken. I did that, but after a time it was clear who would and would not be the hard line shunners. These are the ones I disavowed completly.

Outoftheorg

27

Shunning your own teenage daughter?

by janiemh in

jw
friends

something just occurred to me that i have never thought of before.

my husband and i are separated currently.

among other things, his anger management problems and rages and my control and emotional neglect and withdrawl issues were key factors.

outoftheorg

Hello again Jan.

Glad you set me straight on the way you talk to your daughter. You have many replies here to draw from. I hope this is of some help to you.

I tend to not suggest taking steps that will put an end to a marriage without at least an attempt to heal the family. If your husband would agree to counseling "not from elders" with a professional counselor that included you and your children I would suggest you try this. At least this way you don"t have to look back with doubts about your actions. This way you have no- if only I had-or we might have made it if- to deal with in the future.

I would not be surprised if you found your husband to be a very confused person due to his association with jw's and what they will indoctrinate in him. This causes illogical thought patterns and makes an angry person even angrier and frustrated. It is obvious that he does not know how to handle this situation in a rational way. It is obvious that he needs help. If he accepts the help he could become a very different person. If he refuses and carries on as he is, you can take any steps you need to protect you and your family.

If the anger gets worse and you or the children are in any way in danger, take imediate steps to protect your selves

I hope this turns out in a way that provides you and the children peace and contentment.

Outoftheorg

27

Shunning your own teenage daughter?

by janiemh in

jw
friends

something just occurred to me that i have never thought of before.

my husband and i are separated currently.

among other things, his anger management problems and rages and my control and emotional neglect and withdrawl issues were key factors.

outoftheorg

Hi Janiemh.

They may or may not have told him that. But they do teach shunning as a way of chastising someone. So He may have come to the conclusion to shun his daughter because of that.

The jw religion is a bad place for someone with anger control problems. The mental confusion caused by a cult adds to the problem. Also their teaching of chastising children "with the rod" is dangerous for one with out control of his anger.

Any stressful event can be the last straw in a sequence of events leading to depression. I notice you use the term "immoral activity" in describing your childs mistake. I would avoid stigmatizing your child with words like that. Immoral describes corrupt-depraved-licentious conduct. Your child made a mistake. It is the rare person that has not made the same mistake your child did. I would advise that you not add to the guilt and shame she seems to have. What she needs now with all that is going on is assurance that she is loved, cared for, and important to her family.

I can see that this is a difficult time for all of you.

You have my best wishes for a healthy healing outcome .

Outoftheorg

57

A Silent Ram

by DakotaRed in

jw
friends

this is probably going to be the most difficult thing i have ever written.

but, since i dont plan on being around [here] much longer, what the hell?

for some time now, we have discussed and expressed our outrage and horror at child molestation.

outoftheorg

Hello again Dakota.

Glad you cleared the question up. I will miss your posts and humor. The insight and humor combined display good inteligence.

A lot of people end up in the northwest don't they? I settled in SW Idaho. Less rain more snow. I wish you the best in your life. I have the same thoughts you expressed about slowing down on the visits here and eventually fading away. It sure has been interesting and I found a lot of documentation here that I copied and gave to others to help expose the wbts.

The wife and I made a trip through vancouver and to st helens area this spring. Beautiful country. I was born in portland and don't like all the rain. We thought we may find something further east of the coast and get a more dry climate. Go very far east and it is wheat growing country and too dry.

Go figure.

Outoftheorg

57

A Silent Ram

by DakotaRed in

jw
friends

this is probably going to be the most difficult thing i have ever written.

but, since i dont plan on being around [here] much longer, what the hell?

for some time now, we have discussed and expressed our outrage and horror at child molestation.

outoftheorg

Hi Dakota.

I am glad you pointed out the issue of litle boys and also some little girls get molested by females. Mothers or sisters or neighbors etc.

It has all the affects you mentioned and is not well known. I know this is hard for you to post this on the forum. You are to be comended for doing so. It needs to be known.

I don't want to be nosey so you need not answer this question if you wish. What do you mean about that "don't plan to be around long" statement? Kind of scares me.

I always enjoy your posts and humor. Hang in there, OK?

Outoftheorg