anonymous brother does it again!
(huge round of applause!!!
(regular) http://www.sendspace.com/file/nzjme3.
I just printed the simplified version and showed it to several of my coworkers. The response was a universal OMFG WTF!!!! It embarrasses me to have ever been involved with this crap.
Instead of turning in my resignation as an elder, I decided not to go to the meeting at all this Tuesday. I had the Bible Highlights assigned, so I'm pretty sure they will figure things out at some point. Of course after looking at this "see spot run" brochure, maybe not...
well here goes... i apologize in advance if this turns into a long and disjointed rant, but i just have to begin typing in order to keep from exploding.
i realize that what im about to say could seriously jeopardize my anonymity, but i think ive reached the point that i just dont care.
i want this to be over.. let me explain what caused me to rip up a letter and get up and walk out in the middle of an elders meeting two weekends ago.. our boe has been embroiled in a nasty fight for the past 2 years over a certain brothers business dealings.
By the way, I read Crisis of Conscience two weeks ago and just finished Captives of a Concept today. I have been lurking here for quite a while, and have learned so much that I wasn't sure I would benefit by reading either of these books. There really weren't any revelations in the books that I had not seen here, but Ray's personal experience is so powerful and his manner so kind, that I have to recommend COC as a must read. Captives was much less personal, but I like the logical way in which the facts are presented. Both books are worth the read.
AD
i finally resigned as an elder.
my conscience wouldn't allow me to continue.
i've battled for years trying to reconcile the fallacies of the wt society with my own personal beliefs.
Way to go Franklin. I know how hard it is to step down as an Elder, as I am tormented with making the same decision myself. Stories such as yours inspire me and give confidence that it can be done.
No matter what, you know in your heart that you have done the right thing. It's great that you did it while limiting influence from outside. That way you know it was your decision.
Best of luck to you.
AD
yes, folks!
you heard me correctly.. of course i'm not going to any jc or discussing the matter as i do not recognize jdub authority.. it'll be nice to get my release papers.
apparently an 'anonymous caller' dobbed me in.. how childish!
Punk - Congratulations. We are all so happified to see you reaching out for the office of overseer DF'd apostate.
Best of Luck to you.
AD
well here goes... i apologize in advance if this turns into a long and disjointed rant, but i just have to begin typing in order to keep from exploding.
i realize that what im about to say could seriously jeopardize my anonymity, but i think ive reached the point that i just dont care.
i want this to be over.. let me explain what caused me to rip up a letter and get up and walk out in the middle of an elders meeting two weekends ago.. our boe has been embroiled in a nasty fight for the past 2 years over a certain brothers business dealings.
Wow, I'm really honored that so many of you have taken the time to read my story and respond. There are so many great replies here that I can't respond to each of you individually in the short time I have free before my wife comes home.
Thank you all for sharing your similar experiences and good advice. The more experiences I read, the more I realize that I am not alone, so many have trod this path before me.
As to the advice to take advantage of the situation and fade, I would if I could. Unfortunately in January of this year I confessed some of my doubts to my wife and she immediately called her parents to come over to "snatch me out of the fire". As I mentioned earlier, my FIL is also an elder on the same body. They believe they have succeeded in bringing me back, but are keeping a hyper-vigilant eye on my "spirituality". A fade is impossible with my current situation, and I just don't think I can continue living a lie. My wife told me back then that she doesn't care if the organization is right or not, she's content to stay and wait on Jehovah because of how much better her mother's life has turned out. She will choose Jehovah over me. I don't want to end an otherwise happy marriage, but conditional love is no love at all. At this point I think I may have a better chance with my children by showing them they don't have to believe in anything just because someone told them they should. I want to be a good father to them and give them the freedom to think for themselves.
1pnt - Thank you for your concern and for reminding me that the "end is near". I hope you realize that if you are in fact right and this is Jehovah's Org, that old Teddy Jaracz (sp) is looking down on you now as you post on an apostate forum and he's gonna send Jesus to kill your disobedient ass along with all the rest of us. Just something to think about.
AD
well here goes... i apologize in advance if this turns into a long and disjointed rant, but i just have to begin typing in order to keep from exploding.
i realize that what im about to say could seriously jeopardize my anonymity, but i think ive reached the point that i just dont care.
i want this to be over.. let me explain what caused me to rip up a letter and get up and walk out in the middle of an elders meeting two weekends ago.. our boe has been embroiled in a nasty fight for the past 2 years over a certain brothers business dealings.
Well here goes… I apologize in advance if this turns into a long and disjointed rant, but I just have to begin typing in order to keep from exploding. I realize that what I’m about to say could seriously jeopardize my anonymity, but I think I’ve reached the point that I just don’t care. I want this to be over.
Let me explain what caused me to rip up a letter and get up and walk out in the middle of an elder’s meeting two weekends ago.
Our BOE has been embroiled in a nasty fight for the past 2 years over a certain brother’s business dealings. His business was featured on the local news as a scam for non-payment of contract workers, and many of these workers were sisters from nearby congregations, so it garnered some amount of notoriety. He was an elder and had many friends on the BOE, so now it is split between those who investigated the matter and know it’s a fraud and those who side with their friend. His FIL is also on the body. The branch was dragged in by the CO, and they immediately instructed the matter to be dropped and not looked into any further (afraid of getting sued, methinks). He was removed due to the notoriety, but insists he did nothing wrong. He is very prideful and is not content to have the matter dropped; he wants the elders who looked into the matter (trying to keep the congo clean) removed.
I was appointed as an elder a little over a year ago, almost a year into this mess, at age 30. Because of this issue, I have never been to a civil elder’s meeting. The division is deep and causes the brothers to speak to each other with contempt. This has caused me to see that the BOE is NOT directed by Holy Spirit, and that realization caused me to give myself permission to begin researching more about the org. So, over the last 6 months or so, I have become convinced that this is not God’s org., and I want out, but it’s extremely difficult due to family in (I posted more of my family story a couple of months ago).
So, with all of this going on, we have an elder’s meeting two Saturday’s ago in preparation for the CO’s visit in June. Things start out as usual, with scriptures read that we remain peaceable and in unity, though everyone knows that won’t happen. About 10 minutes into it, one of the brothers begins handing out letters addressed to each elder that were left on his doorstep that morning. The COBE asked for the letter to be read aloud, but since I am a fast reader, I read to the end long before the reading was done. Basically this brother is claiming that though the matter has been “officially” dropped, the brothers who were out to get him are shunning his family and still looking for ways to harass him. I personally know this not to be true, since my FIL is one of these brothers and the COBE is a kindly older man who just wants this to go away, but this brother won’t be satisfied until he gets his revenge. Anyhow, I knew what kind of shit storm this was going to stir up, so as the letter was read, I quietly packed my things, and when it was finished, I ripped the letter to pieces and walked out the door. I know that I will never attend another elder’s meeting.
I left partly because of the hypocrisy and fighting amongst the local BOE, but more because I just know this is not God’s Org. The funny thing is that the other elders think I was taking a stand for righteousness and many have since told me they wish they could have done what I did. They all feel sorry for me because of being thrown into this situation as a young elder and not having even been involved when it all began. They are all trying to give encouragement to continue serving, but I plan on turning in my KS10 on Sunday.
I know the CO will want to discuss this with me during his visit, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to keep my feelings to myself, nor am I sure I even want to. I know that expressing my true feelings would get me DF’d and with that I stand to lose my family, but I just can’t continue on the way things are. I am even considering beating them to the punch and DA’ing. I have so much respect for those of you who have already ripped of the band-aid. Thank you all for your encouragement and examples.
And thank you for all who have taken the time to read my venting.
AD
who holds the world record for the most disfellowshipings [ an reinstatments] in a single life time?.
i knew of one poor person charleen moss (roy baty's sister) who did it seven times.
she was a classic damed if i do, damed if i don't.
I think "Andre" holds all record related to the WTB&TS.
AD
yesterday i opened my wallet and took a long look at the (no) blood card prominently displayed inside.
i have been convinced that this is not the truth for a couple of years now, and am trying to figure out whether to fade or da.
it hit me hard yesterday that with this piece of paper in my wallet, i could possibly end up dying for beliefs i no longer hold.
R&R - If you don't report field service time Jehovah's doesn't recognize you anyway, so it's not important for you to obey "God's Command" to abstain from blood. Don't you know your publisher record cards make up the Book of Life?
In all seriousness though, congrats on nearing completion of a successful fade.
AD
yesterday i opened my wallet and took a long look at the (no) blood card prominently displayed inside.
i have been convinced that this is not the truth for a couple of years now, and am trying to figure out whether to fade or da.
it hit me hard yesterday that with this piece of paper in my wallet, i could possibly end up dying for beliefs i no longer hold.
Thanks all for the positive comments. Yes, it was a very liberating experience.
FF said
"Getting rid of my blood card was one of the first things I did when I left the JWs."
My point is that even those who have not yet left the JW's need to destroy the No Blood Card. It's easy to get rid of if you have cut your ties, but many here are faders or active members of the "conscious class" who have reasons why they are still in. Those may not find it so easy, or even have thought it necessary to get rid of the card. They may not be ready make a stand for what they now believe, but this is something that can be done relatively privately, and it could potentially save a life.
yesterday i opened my wallet and took a long look at the (no) blood card prominently displayed inside.
i have been convinced that this is not the truth for a couple of years now, and am trying to figure out whether to fade or da.
it hit me hard yesterday that with this piece of paper in my wallet, i could possibly end up dying for beliefs i no longer hold.
Yesterday I opened my wallet and took a long look at the (No) Blood Card prominently displayed inside. I have been convinced that this is not the truth for a couple of years now, and am trying to figure out whether to fade or DA. It hit me hard yesterday that with this piece of paper in my wallet, I could possibly end up dying for beliefs I no longer hold. So, I committed un-suicide by walking to the office shredder and watching the DPA card be cross-cut into ribbons.
I must encourage all faders and lurkers out there; If you don't whole-heartedly believe the blood doctrine, you have to get rid of the Blood Card. If you are involved in some tragic accident and are unconscious, doctors will have no choice but to follow your written wishes. Don't risk it.
Please, commit un-suicide with me.
AD
