Posts by Morbidzbaby

15

The River

by sabastious in

jw
friends

information today runs through the neighborhoods of the world like a raging river and even the watchtower has no power to stop it from reaching their members.

that river is what swept me away.. a river is a two way analogy for my experience.

the apostate in me would say that, although highly painful and far too long, i am happy where the river washed me up and, now that my wounds have healed enough, i am starting to rebuild my life, for the better.

Morbidzbaby

Wonderful analogy, sab. It describes the journey the vast majority of us have had to face. The raging part is what got me...I have tended to be like that when asking questions of my parents as to WHY things are the way they are when the bible clearly states they are otherwise.

The thing I have come to realize is that in life and in situations such as this, when the river is raging and you see your family is in the same river and they're drowning with smiles on their faces, you can try to pull them out on your own but they fight you because they think they are fighting for their own lives. Just as in the coast guard, you would risk your own life and safety to save them...but they will fight you for their own survival and not care that they might drag you back into the current. Rescue swimmers are taught to do whatever it takes to subdue a victim so they can be safely saved without injuring or putting the swimmer in danger. Sometimes being hit in the face with the cold hard truth is enough to get them out. And sometimes they just have to be left behind. There comes a point where all you can do is save yourself and let them go. As sick as it is, they are happy they are drowning. And in my case, I know I just have to let them.

29

Visit from a car group

by Lunatic Faith in

jw
friends

so, yesterday (saturday) i was working on homework while pyramidscheme and his son were outside in the garage.

i hear the doorbell ring, at noon, and go to answer it.

it's a car group!

Morbidzbaby

Sorry Luna... I agree with the above members, though...if it happens again, tell them how you feel about their claim that they miss you and how you realize if one of them didn't have to pinch a loaf, they would never have come to your house.

I haven't been to a meeting in MONTHS. July will be a year officially. Not once has a JW come by who was not an elder and wasn't obligated to inquire after me. Sure, they send messages through my parents, but other than that, they stay away. They don't care. Once you're out of sight, you're out of mind until someone mentions you and then it's "Oh, I remember her/him...*tsk tsk tsk and shaking head* I really don't know what happened to her/him...he/she doesn't come to meetings anymore and I heard that [insert disparaging rumor here]".

Incredibly, as much as I am glad they don't come around so I don't feel pushed into a corner and made to explain, I do send my hello's through my mother and even treats I've made. They've enjoyed my brownies and rice krispies treats on a few occasions and always send along a thank you. Just because I'm an "apostate" in the eyes of those who are aware of my leanings does not mean I am evil and heartless. I'm still the kind person I've always been.

26

is getting a blood transfusion in itself a DF offense?

by oompa in

jw
friends

i know if you join the military it is considered that you have dissassociated yourself...but if you are in an accident and are given blood when you are unconcious...is that in itself reason for df?

or what if you willingly accepted a blood transfusion?

what if you do not show remorse or repentance or even refuse to meet with the elders?

Morbidzbaby

Oompa I wasn't aware of your situation, so that does change things a bit, doesn't it? If you need to get the DF'ing overturned, then go for it. I'd take the advice mentioned above and try to get it overturned. Here's the thing...if they refuse to accept your appeal, would you try to get reinstated? If you can prove that it wasn't intentional, they may overturn it...but you'd have to prove it. Can you?

Here's an aside...sometimes...SOMETIMES you can get a doctor to write something for you to help you out. I had a physician post-date something by over a month so that I could get a procedure done that I decided to do at the last minute...she dated the paper for the previous month when I signed because my insurance would not cover it without 30 days prior signature. So, she kinda lied, but not really because we HAD discussed it a month before, but I hadn't decided yet. You might be able to maneuver something through your doctor.

59

Reality exists in your brain

by Nickolas in

i've just posted the following in another thread whose subject is supernatural experience, but it may deserve its own thread so i'll repost it here.

i don't believe in the supernatural but i do believe that people experience unexplained things.

where i differ from some people is that i perceive the unexplained things exist only in their brains and not in the physical world around them.. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------.

Morbidzbaby

I'm very interested in lucid dreaming. I could swear it happens to me, I just don't know HOW. It's not something I actively pursue. Most often, I am always with my children talking to them and being happy with them. Sometimes they are upset with me because they don't understand why things are the way they are...and sometimes they are just happy to be with me again. I can see them, smell them, touch them, hear their voices...I live for those dreams. They always make me happy. I wake up remembering everything, but knowing that it wasn't real.

23

30 years of bound volumes make it to the curb .....

by troubled mind in

our box of watchtower and awake bound volumes have sat out in the garage the past five yrs .

this week is city wide clean up so we finally toted them to the curb .

those suckers are heavy !

Morbidzbaby

A did this a couple of weeks ago. Any and all "litterature" that was mine was trashed. I've purged myself of all of it, save the NWT reference edition. I don't know why I haven't chucked it. I liked my NIV better, even though I'm a non-believer. I like to read certain passages because, while I don't believe the bible was divinely inspired, it does hold some good ideas. Wisdom can be found in the oddest of places.

26

is getting a blood transfusion in itself a DF offense?

by oompa in

jw
friends

i know if you join the military it is considered that you have dissassociated yourself...but if you are in an accident and are given blood when you are unconcious...is that in itself reason for df?

or what if you willingly accepted a blood transfusion?

what if you do not show remorse or repentance or even refuse to meet with the elders?

Morbidzbaby

Sorry this is going on oompa...

To the best of my knowledge, they consider you DA'ed if you accept a blood transfusion. If you're unconscious, they may not because you had no say, however if they really want to stick it to you they might point out that you should have had your medical directive on you and this should have been in your medical records for your doctor to know. They may argue you should have taken more precautions in order to prevent such a travesty.

However, if you chose to willingly accept a transfusion of one of the four main components (read: no-no blood), then as far as I know from what I have read, they consider you DA'ed.

I personally would just let it go. They did what they did, what does it matter WHY? They are a cult and have their own deluded reasons for their actions.

As for legal action, well, what's done is done. Even if they took back the DF'ing/DA'ing and announced it, you'd still be treated like a social pariah because of the simple fact that the elders "went there"...so you must have done something pretty heinous in the eyes of the congregation to warrant such punishment, even if it is recanted after it was doled out. Defamation of character is important, but not really a big deal unless it has affected your job, your home, or your livelihood. For instance, the things I was accused of by my ex, if they were ever reported to police for investigation, I would have lost all and any means of supporting myself that I am currently certified for even though I am completely 100% innocent. THAT would have been a defamation of character suit (and might still be considering my livelihood was threatened).

Like I said, personally I would just let it go.

30

How to remain sane while being a hypocrite?

by Kensho in

as time goes on i find it a real challenge to keep my sanity while still in "the truth" especially after considering all the rsearch i have been doing about the org.

that i have been very active in for almost 4 decades.

i have managed to be removed as an elder while staying in good standing (prayers-reading,mic carring etc.

Morbidzbaby

As others have put it so wonderfully, you will know when it's time for you to leave. Your heart will tell you.

My breaking point came a couple of meetings after the last District Convention. Up to that point, I had been skipping a few Sunday meetings a month, and when I did go, I'd show up late (after the Public Talk and into part of the Watchtower study). I always used the excuse of needing to get something to eat cause I just got out of work (very true). But this one meeting...I just couldn't do it. I sat out in the lot and ate my lunch, went inside, and the Public Talk was still going on...I sat and listened for about 10 minutes and then got up and went outside. I became SO ANGRY at what was being said. It wasn't anything different than before, it was the same ol' same ol' business as usual talk. But this time I couldn't take it anymore. I stood outside in the scorching summer heat, looking out at the grass and flowers and knowing that I couldn't do this anymore. I calmed down, went back inside after about 45 minutes, sat in the foyer and feigned exhaustion from work. After the meeting, I went home, and soon after I donated all of my skirts to a local second-hand store. I was officially done.

I still have family in (a lot of family, in fact). I know once I leave here, I'll have minimal contact with my family, if any at all. And I'm in a place now where that's okay. That is THEIR choice, not mine.

I hope one day you can get to a place where your conscience and your heart are more important to you than superficial relationships. I learned quickly that family, no matter how loving they may seem, will turn on you once you denounce the org. This means their love is conditional. They don't know GENUINE love. And those people, while painful to walk away from, are not worth having in my life if they don't want to accept me for WHO I AM and not WHAT I BELIEVE.

58

I was an Idiot.

by NomadSoul in

jw
friends

not too many threads like these but i thought this forum could use one.

not going to use the inexperience or ignorance excuse.

nor am i going to excuse that i was a born in.. plain and simple: i was an idiot for believing in the jehovah witness religion.. okay, no cat pictures.. .

Morbidzbaby

Mary- you're awesome...couldn't have said it better...

kjw53- If only you knew how judgemental you sound. JW's are "separate" in their own eyes. They "pledged their allegiance" to the UN for 10 years, so by your own reasoning, they themselves would be condemned. Try doing some REAL research on the Watchtower and see what they're hiding before you go defending them as "the only ones who....". You'll see that they are pretty much like every other religious group, only they are more high-control and brain-numbing and MUCH better at hiding the facts from the rank and file. At least with the Catholic church, the pedophilia has been brought to light with their members and is no longer denied...the WTBS still likes to cover it over in their own ranks and leaves children as lambs to the slaughter.

58

I was an Idiot.

by NomadSoul in

jw
friends

not too many threads like these but i thought this forum could use one.

not going to use the inexperience or ignorance excuse.

nor am i going to excuse that i was a born in.. plain and simple: i was an idiot for believing in the jehovah witness religion.. okay, no cat pictures.. .

Morbidzbaby

I'm of the belief that a person can be quite intelligent, but still be a freakin' idiot lol

18

Where Did You Think You Stood?

by Ding in

consider a scale from 0 to 100.. 0 = if armageddon comes tonight, i am doomed for sure.

100 = if armageddon comes tonight, i will survive into the new system for sure.

back when you believed the wt was the truth, what range on this scale reflects your own assessment of where you stood with jehovah?.

Morbidzbaby

I never once felt I would be petting any lions. Maybe when I was a little kid, but as I got older, nope. I did some things and thought some things that would have gotten me smote for sure (masturbation, anyone?), and I was so guilty over them and "not doing enough" that I just thought I'd be dead as a doornail. I feared Armageddon because it would mean my probable demise. No matter how many times I prayed and cried my heart out to "Jehovah" (even though I questioned that he even existed at all I prayed every once in awhile just in case), I never felt "right with god". I never felt good enough.