It has been a difficult Marriage to say the least, but me getting my tubes tied is not so simple, first of my husband stopped earning an income about 2 years ago, second our Medical Insurance was cancelled about 8 months ago. Thirdly I have some medical conditions which prevent me from getting the surgery due to pushing me into menopause. I have had side effects and used hormone drugs for a while to prevent early onset of menopause. I have damaged my body for over 16 years so that we could have a sex life, personally I feel if he loved me at all it would not be an issue.
What is keeping me here well I hate to admit it but I was so troubled by all of this that I went to visit a Physic...yep I did it, what she told me was that due to all of my husbands issues growing up in an incest home and having sex so early as the age of 10, being exposed wrongly to sex has caused him to carry around a lot of guilt, it is terrible but he is really sick mentally. He really believes that Jehovah wants us to not even have sex, because of growing up with all the sexual issues and never getting any counseling our Marriage Counsler feels he brought those issues over into his adult life. Long story bareable he is sick, he carries around guilt over what happen to him and what he did to others sexually.
Well the physic says that he will die of a massive heart attack because of all of his childhood issues, of course at first I did not believe her, but then she started telling me that it is true and that I should be more concerned about getting my Home affairs in order, such as life insurance (my husband does not believe in it because of the new system coming) mortgage insurance, and the care for my boys after he is gone. Now she had my attention... she went on to add that my Husband would never listen to me because he really does not respect anything I say.
It was difficult to hear but true, I came home in tears it took me days to face my husband, and finally ask him when was the last time he had taken his meds, he told me 3 weeks ago because he did not have the money for the copayment. I was sick to my stomach I dont want my Husband to die I have always pictured him growing old with my boys like a Father should. I tried so many times to get him to take it but he does not care much about his health in general.
Then the Physic went on to tell me that it does not matter what I do he will still die, she said that I may be able to prolong it but it will happen, I feel terrible about it and finally just got the idea out of my head. I feel like I have to do what ever I can and how ever I can do it so I agreed to move back into our bedroom and work it out. Then the one time we did have sex he would not pull out, I was upset but felt ok because he agreed I could get an abortion saying it was my body. Until the test came back positive then he started treating me terrible again.
Right now I have agreed to stay with him with out sex while he goes and jacs off, he recently claimed that having a vasecomy would not only cause him to become gay but the side effects will even cause him bleeding internally and other damage to his body. As if taking Birth Control for 16 f -ing years did not cause me to bleed with extra periods and I still have low blood count.
I can not write more right now but will later.
I just wanted to know if real men thought this shit was ok?